The Risks We Take Duet Box Set

39. Cooper

COOPER

G etting back into the routine with Charlie Team is like breathing to me. You don’t even realize you’re doing it. It requires no effort. No thought. The guys and I work together like a well-oiled machine. And when Trick, Wanda, and I walk in the house Saturday morning from a five-mile run on the beach, Linc and Emerson are sitting in the kitchen, staring at something on the table.

“Hey Em, have you heard from Carys?” She’s been distant since she left for Kroydon Hills. She’s barely responded to my texts, and we’ve only spoken once. That’s not like her.

“Yeah.” She doesn’t lift her head. Doesn’t so much as look my way. “She came home late last night. I think Theo picked her up from the airport.

I still while blood roars in my ears. “What?” Why the hell would she ask him to do that?

She doesn’t say anything.

Linc doesn’t say anything.

“What the hell is up with these two?” Trick asks as he throws me a bottle of Gatorade.

“Em.” I move in front of her.

Linc shoves me away with a hand to the center of my chest. “Back off, brother. You’re not the only one dealing with something right fucking now.”

I take a step back and look at my friend. He’s pale as a ghost with a freaked the fuck out expression on his face. Trick stands next to me, and we both look down at what they’re staring at on the table.

“Holy shit.”

Linc looks up. “You can say that again.”

“I’m gonna be sick.” Emerson bolts for the bathroom with the three of us watching in shock.

Linc picks up the pregnancy test with two pink lines displayed brightly on the screen. “She’s pregnant.”

Trick and I stay with Linc until he gets his shit together enough to go to Emerson. Then we try to give them some space as they work this out.

“Dude, what do you think they’re going to do?”

I shrug and chug my Gatorade. “No clue.”

“What would you do if this were you and Carys?” He sits down at the table, looking at the pregnancy test like it’s a disease he can catch.

“Pretty sure I’d marry Carys tomorrow if she’d say yes. But to get to that point, I need her to agree to telling the family. She’s not there yet. So, I don’t have a fucking clue what we’d do.” The thought makes my head spin. “I didn’t even know she came home last night.”

“You gonna head over there? Try to catch up with her?”

I stand to head to my room. I need to shower and change. “Yeah. I’ll head over before I go to base. See you in a few.”

T hirty minutes later, Carys opens her front door to me, and her face drops—a reaction that’s diametrically opposite to the one I usually get from her. She looks good in ripped jeans, cuffed at her ankles, and a pair of bright-red Chuck Taylors on her feet that match a slouchy sweater, which is falling off one shoulder. Her black lace bra strap is teasing me, and my mouth aches to taste her skin.

“Cooper. Hi. I meant to call you . . .”

Her formal greeting reminds me that I’m frustrated, even if just seeing her eases some of that. I push inside the door and look around. “Where is everyone?”

“Umm... I think Em’s at your place, and Theo and Jack have something at the school. Are you okay?” She reaches her hand out and fixes the collar of my camo polo shirt, then pulls it back quickly. “Are you on your way to base?” She closes the door and walks into the kitchen.

I follow her like a moth to the flame. “What’s going on, Carys? You haven’t returned my calls or my texts. You’ve been avoiding me. And you asked Theo to pick you up from the airport.” I stalk behind her and circle my arms around her waist, drawing her back to me. “What’s changed, baby? Talk to me.”

She tugs free and takes a few steps away. “I... Cooper...” Carys runs her fingers through her hair, then laughs.

“What the hell, Carys?” I force myself to stand still, even if it goes against every fucking fiber of my being to do it. “Talk to me. It’s you and me, baby.”

Carys spins on her heels and exhales a stuttered breath. “Cooper,” she sobs. “I can’t do this right now.”

“Can’t do what?” Fuck this. I take two steps forward and grab her shoulders. “What can’t you do?”

She shoves back against my chest. “I can’t do this .” She shoves me again, but I refuse to let go. “I can’t do us . Not right now, Coop. I just can’t.”

“Why? I need you to explain to me what’s going on in that beautiful brain of yours, baby. Because this doesn’t make sense. I’m yours, remember? I’m not going anywhere. I know you’re going through hell right now, but let me carry some of the load for you. Let me be there.”

“I don’t want you here, Coop. I don’t want you to carry the load.” She shrugs herself free, and I let her go, feeling like I’ve been sucker-punched. “I need some space. I think... I just...” Her lip trembles as she tries not to cry, and I’m at a complete fucking loss.

I take a step closer, needing to fix this, but she takes one step back. “Carys, you were in my arms a week ago. What’s changed?”

“Everything,” she whispers. “Please, Cooper. My head is throbbing. I just want to lie down. Just go.”

“Carys . . .”

“Just go, Coop.” Her words are soft but deliver more weight than any words I’ve ever heard.

“I love you, Carys Murphy. I love you, and I know you love me.” I’m practically begging her to say the words because I can’t imagine my life without this woman who’s falling apart in front of me.

“It’s not enough, Cooper. Not now. Please just go.”

Those words break me in a way that I didn’t realize a man could break.

On a level I didn’t know existed before.

“Carys...” I have no words of wisdom. Nothing left to say to fight for us because I’m so fucking confused. What just happened?

She turns and walks away without looking back, and I just stand there, dumbstruck, watching her. Trying to figure out where we went wrong.