The Risks We Take Duet Box Set

46. Carys

CARYS

I ’m not sure how I accumulated so much stuff over the past twelve months, but as I tape up the last of my boxes to be shipped back to Philly, I wonder, yet again, where it all came from. When we moved into this place last year, I only had two bins, my suitcases, and a few canvas bags full of stuff. I lost count of the boxes the guys have taken from my room. They’ve been great, carrying it all downstairs for me.

I look around my now-bare room and run my hand over the box I’ve carefully packed my sewing machine in. I can’t believe I’m saying goodbye to California. And as Cooper knocks on my door, it’s even harder to believe I’m saying goodbye to him .

“Hey, you almost ready to head to the airport?” We’ve texted a few times in the three weeks since my brother’s wedding, but it’s been awkward. Stilted. He’s trying to give me the space and time I need to figure out where my head’s at, but I’m no closer now than I was a month ago. I did agree to let him drive me to the airport today.

I take a look around the room and appreciate what living in this house gave me one last time. This past year showed me how strong I am and how fragile life is. I’m done hiding. I’m done holding back. I’m living my life. I wish it could be with this man at my side, but I don’t think that’s how this is all going to work out.

I take a deep breath. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

Cooper pushes the door open, and I walk past him and down the steps.

Emerson’s waiting in the kitchen with a bag of oil and vinegar chips in her hands. This kid is going to come out with a cholesterol issue from the way Em’s been going to town on junk food. Her tiny bump popped and no longer looks like a food baby. Linc and she decided not to find out what they’re having, so we’re still referring to the baby as whatever fruit the books compare it to each month. I think this week it’s an eggplant.

She hugs me with her greasy fingers, crushing the bag against my back. “I can’t believe you’re really leaving me.”

“I’m just a plane ride away. And your dad has a private jet. You can come to Kroydon Hills whenever you want.”

Em starts crying. “I’m going to miss you so much.”

“Love you, Em.” I hold back my own tears, not wanting to make this worse, and the way she’s been emotional lately, it would definitely turn into a sob-fest.

Linc circles his arms around his wife. “You’ve got to let her go, babe. You’ll see her again soon.” He looks at me for support.

“Absolutely,” I agree.

Linc hugs me to him with his free arm and kisses my cheek. “Stay in touch, Carys.”

“Come here, CC.” Jack tugs me from Linc and hands me a notebook.

I turn it over in my hand. “Jack,” I gasp. “This is your notebook.” I run my thumb along the worn pages. “You can’t give this to me. Your songs are all in here.”

“They are. But you promised you’d help fine-tune them. I still need your help, and we can work it out over FaceTime or Zoom.” He hugs me, whispering, “Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

I know what this means to him and can’t believe he’d give it to me. “One day, I’m going to say I knew you two when.” I look over at Theo and open my arm for him to join us. “Thanks for letting me sing with you guys. I’ll never forget it.”

Theo chuckles. “We’d never let you stop if we could. Your voice is one in a million, Carys, and so are you. Promise you’ll call if you need anything.”

“Promise,” I push the word out, perilously close to losing it.

Cooper must see that I’m struggling because he clears his throat. “We’ve got to go, Carys.”

I step back and look around at the makeshift family I formed here.

Completely unexpected but absolutely perfect.

“I love you guys.”

Cooper places his hand at the small of my back and ushers me through the front door to a chorus of goodbyes and love yous before I climb into the Jeep and let the tears come.

I know this is the right move, but saying goodbye always sucks. And as I watch Coop walk around the Jeep before he gets in, I know saying goodbye to him will be the hardest.

W e’re quiet on the quick drive to the airport, neither of us talking and instead choosing to sit in the heavy silence surrounding us. Not sure what’s left to be said.

When Cooper pulls up to the terminal and shuts off the Jeep, I hop out and grab my carry-on as he picks up my suitcase. We meet on the sidewalk, and I can’t help but feel like this is it. “Thanks for the ride, Coop.”

Jesus. Could I sound more pathetic? I might as well have told him I carried a goddamned watermelon.

“I’ll see you in two weeks at the wedding.” His arms circle around me, holding me tight to his chest, and I melt in his embrace, fearing this is the last time I’m ever going to feel this. I’m still so utterly fucked up over all of this.

I kiss his cheek, then look up at those eyes I love. “Two weeks.”

Coop grips the back of my head and crashes his lips to mine, and chills break out, covering my body. I hate how much I love him because that’s how much I want to protect him from me and my life.

When he pulls away, his fist wraps in my hair and tugs my head back, forcing me to look up at him. “Text me tonight when you land. Let me know you got in okay. And remember, this isn’t over. I’ll see you at the wedding.”

I purse my lips together and nod. “Okay.” Then I turn to leave.

“Carys . . .”

I stop and look over my shoulder. “We’re worth it, baby. I love you.”

I blow him a kiss and walk into the airport. Alone.

Carys

I landed. Flight was fine. Chloe’s picking me up from the airport.

Cooper

Thank you. Are you going straight to Chloe’s or stopping at home first?

Carys

Just going to Chloe’s tonight. I promised Mom I’d come over for lunch tomorrow.

Cooper

See you soon, baby.

Carys

Be safe, Coop.