The Risks We Take Duet Box Set

52. Carys

CARYS

I t’s late in the night by the time Declan drives Coach and me to the small private airport just outside the city, where the Kingston family’s personal jet is fueled and waiting to take us to Saarbrücken Airport, which is about twenty-five miles from Landstuhl, the military hospital where Cooper and his team have been airlifted. Coach and Declan sit in the front seat of the SUV, talking quietly while I stare out the window behind them. Thinking.

We say goodbye to Declan, and Coach and I sit on opposite sides of the jet as we settle in for the eight-hour flight ahead of us. I take out the Kroydon football hoodie I stole from Cooper’s old bedroom at Coach’s house and slide it over my head, then tuck a blanket around my legs and close my eyes.

That’s how Coach and I spend the first few hours of the long flight.

Quiet and on opposite sides of the jet.

At some point over the Atlantic Ocean, my phone vibrates, and my heart skips a beat at the incoming call from Jessie. I slide my thumb across the screen, and my voice cracks. “Jessie...”

“Carys, I just heard from Ford.” She sounds as tired as I feel.

“How is he? What did he tell you?” Coach stands and crosses the aisle to sit next to me. He takes my empty hand in his, and I put the phone on speaker between us. “Jess, I put you on speaker. Cooper’s dad is next to me.”

“Ford couldn’t tell me everything. He didn’t have much time or much information, but he wanted me to hear it from him. Something happened, and an op went really wrong. A building they were in was blown up and collapsed. But there had to be more to it than that. Ford took two shots to his leg. The guys are all hurt. Cooper’s in surgery now, and so is Trick. He didn’t know everything, but Cooper was shot. He doesn’t think Trick was. He told me to tell you that Coop was awake during the flight to Landstuhl, and he was asking about you.”

Tears flood my eyes, imagining him hurt and asking for me.

Please let this man forgive me.

“Did he say anything else, Jess? Does he know anything else?” I’m grasping, desperate for information to cling to.

“No.” She sighs, exhaustion no doubt trying to yank her under. “But I’ll call you back as soon as I hear anything else.”

“Okay. Coach and I are flying to Germany now. We should be there in a few hours.” I swallow my fear and try to put on a brave face. “How’s Emerson?”

“The doctor gave her a sedative earlier, and she went home with Jack and Theo. They didn’t want her staying at her place alone, so they took her to your old house.” Another piece of my heart breaks for my friend, and it’s hard to believe there are any solid pieces left.

“Thank you, Jessie.”

“Love you, Carys. Stay strong. That’s what he needs from you now. Give him all the strength you have and call me after you see him. We’ll cry together when no one else is around.”

I look up at the ceiling of the jet and blow out a breath, trying to control my emotions. “I’ll call you as soon as I can, Jess.” When I end the call, I look over at Coach, who’s staring at me.

“Are you ready to talk to me, kiddo?” His soft voice relaxes me slightly, but I’m all too aware that this is Cooper’s father and I just admitted to hiding something from him for a year.

“I love him, Coach. I have for years. But I knew I wasn’t supposed to. I knew everyone would think it was wrong.” I knew in my heart it wasn’t, but everyone else would have tried to push us apart.

“Love is never wrong, Carys. It’s complicated.” He sighs. “Between the two of you, more so than most. But it’s not wrong.”

“It seems easy to say that now that it’s out there, but that’s not what it felt like in the beginning, Coach. We were already figuring things out long-distance. In the first six months, I don’t think we spent an entire week together. It felt insurmountable as it was, and yet, falling in love with him—real love, not a teenage crush—that was the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”

Coach’s deep-blue eyes crinkle in the corners as he smiles a small, soft smile for the first time since we got the news earlier. “According to Declan, Cooper is very much in love with you too. He told Dec he’d give the rest of us up before he gave you up, if he had to.”

I bite down on my bottom lip, holding back the sob that catches in my throat. “I messed it up though.”

“I’m sure whatever happened can be fixed.” Coach always exudes strength and confidence, just like his sons.

“I pushed him away. After my diagnosis, I was scared. I didn’t want to force him into taking care of me for the rest of my life, knowing I wouldn’t even be able to give him kids. Knowing that my life could be shorter than his.” I wipe my eyes and shake my head. “It sounds so stupid after today. He begged me not to. He told me it wasn’t the end of us.”

Please, God, let him be right.

“My son is the strongest man I’ve ever known, Carys. He’s going to pull through. He’s going to be fine. And you’re going to be by his side while he does it. Leave your brother and Nattie to me.”

I lean my head on Coach’s shoulder and offer up a silent prayer, begging for him to be right.

H ours later, we land in Germany and are taken directly to the hospital, where we wait for another two hours in a freezing-cold waiting room before the doctor finally comes out to talk to us.

“Mr. Sinclair?” a man in blue scrubs asks as he enters the waiting room.

Coach stands. “I’m Joe Sinclair.”

The doctor joins us in the quiet corner of the room. “Petty Officer Sinclair is out of surgery and awake. He sustained a grade-three concussion from the blast as well as a gunshot wound to his abdomen. He lost a lot of blood but is doing as well as can be expected now. A nurse will be out shortly to take you back to see him.”

The doctor stands as if to leave, and I jump in front of him.

“Is he going to be okay?” I move in front of him while I try to get control of my shaking hands. “You didn’t say he’d be okay.”

“The next twenty-four to seventy-two hours should tell us more.” He nods his head and walks away.

Before I sit back down, a nurse in green scrubs with her hair back in a low bun joins Coach and me. “I can take you back to see Petty Officer Sinclair now.”

“Thank you,” we both say as we follow her down a stark white hall.

The hum of the fluorescent lighting gets louder with each smack of my sneakers against the dark linoleum floor.

I’m not sure how I got to this moment.

A year ago, I was in his arms. We were happy. He loved me.

And I suddenly fear what’s waiting on the other side of that door.

Coach knocks once and steps in ahead of me while I linger in the hall, steadying my nerves before I follow him in. My breath wooshes out of me when I see Cooper in the hospital bed. Bruised, battered, cut, and stitched. His skin is a pale gray instead of his normal golden glow. There are stitches by his brow and a bandage taped around his wrist.

But he’s here.

He’s alive.

He’s breathing.

The rest can be fixed.

We can be fixed.

Tears stream down my face as I walk around to the other side of his hospital bed and lay my hand on top of his before he violently yanks his away.

His eyes pinch as he looks at me in a way he’s never done before. “What are you doing here?”

His voice is full of anger.

His eyes and the way he’s said the words leave no room for discussion.

But I still don’t move.

My feet are stuck in place as I stand, frozen, staring at him. “Cooper...”

He pushes a button on his bed, and within seconds, a different nurse appears in the doorway, and Cooper looks at me for just a moment before moving his attention to her.

“I want this woman removed from my approved list. I don’t want her here.” He looks at me one last time. “Get out.”