The Risks We Take Duet Box Set

72. Cooper

COOPER

O nce Ford and Jessie leave, Rook walks over to the fridge. “What are we doing for dinner?”

Emerson yawns from the couch, while she feeds Elodie under a light blanket Carys laid over them for privacy before going upstairs. “I’m actually starving. Can we order out? I don’t want any of that funeral food. I could go for pizza.”

“Thank fuck. I thought you were going to say sushi or some shit like that.” Rook pulls out his phone and calls it in. “I’m gonna go grab my bag from the truck.”

Emerson’s nearly purple eyes sharpen, focused on me. “Why is Rook getting a bag? What’s in it?”

“He’s going to crash here for a few days. That way, one of us can always be with you girls.” Judging by the venomous expression on her face, I’m glad I’m not within reach right now.

“Do you think one of you assholes could check with me before you make decisions for me?” She asks the question quietly to not upset the baby, but she’s definitely pissed. “I know I’ve been a mess, but I’m an adult. I’m a fucking mother. Do not handle me, Sinclair, or you won’t be happy with the result.” She pulls Elodie out from under the blanket and throws it over her shoulder as she burps the baby. “And I’m not going to smother my baby under a blanket just because two grown men can’t handle boobs.”

Rook walks back in and rolls his neck before a wicked grin stretches across his face. “Those aren’t boobs. Those are watermelons on steroids, woman.”

I expect her to catapult herself over the couch and attack, but Elodie exhales a burp that puts the rest of us to shame, and we all burst out laughing.

Emerson looks at her chest, like it’s the first time she’s seen it, and pulls some little circular pad thing from her bra, then throws it at Rook, smacking him in the face. “Asshole. They’re the best goddamn watermelons you’ll never get to taste.”

He holds up the soaked circle. “What is this?”

Carys walks back downstairs with her sketch pad in hand. She grabs the circle thing from Rook and winces. “Why do you have Emerson’s nursing pad?”

“Her what?” Rook’s expression transforms from confusion to mortification pretty damn quick.

Carys bites her bottom lip, trying to mask her laughter, then pats Rook’s chest with her free hand. “When a woman nurses a baby, her other boob leaks. This sucker...” She holds it up in front of Rook’s face. “Is drenched with breast milk.”

“Fucking gross,” he gags.

“It’s nature, Rook. Get over it.” She slaps the pad back into his hand, then moves next to the couch. “I’ve got to get some sketching done.” She trails a finger along Elodie’s black hair. “Do you need anything, Em?”

“No, thanks. I’m going to try to put her down for a bit and crash until the pizza gets here.” Emerson rises from the couch and adjusts the baby. “On second thought, I’m going to sleep until she wakes up. I can always heat the pizza up. Just don’t let the guys eat it all.”

Carys leans in and kisses the top of Elodie’s head, then heads for the back door.

“Hey, where are you going?” Not my smoothest line.

Her brows shoot up, and she cocks her hip. “I was going outside to sketch. Is that a problem?”

I haven’t told her about the picture I got this morning.

Guess there’s no time like the present.

“We need to talk, Carys.” I reach for her, but she takes a step away, her sharp eyes questioning me.

“That doesn’t sound good, Coop.” She looks around as Rook escapes upstairs.

When I step closer, she stays put and allows me to wrap my fingers around her delicate arms. “I’m concerned Axel is going to use you to get to me. He’s already approached you at the hospital, and he?—”

My girl doesn’t cower when she cuts me off. Her glittering green eyes dance between mine. “Why?”

“What?” I have no idea what she’s getting at.

“Why would he use me? I’m nothing, remember?” She dares me to correct her, and I take the damn bait.

My hands slide up her arms and neck, then into her hair. “You could never be nothing, Carys, and you know it.”

One side of her mouth tips up into a cautious smile. “I had my hopes.”

“He threatened you this morning.” I hold her head possessively and wait for her to freak out. But it doesn’t come.

“He threatened me at the hospital too, didn’t he? I might not have known it then, but I figured it out after you told me what was going on. I’m safe here with you. You won’t let anything happen to me.” She turns her head and kisses my hand. “I’ll go sketch in my room.”

“So you’re not mad then?” I wasn’t expecting her to take this so well, but like always, she continually surprises me.

“Mad? No . Do I have the heebie jeebies about this whole thing? Yes , I do. But it’ll be over soon.” Glad she’s so sure because I’m not there yet.

“Stay inside, okay?” I think of the picture, and my adrenaline pumps with fury. “Make sure your balcony door is locked.”

“You know how I love bossy Cooper.” Her teeth dig into her bottom lip, and the little brat practically skips up the stairs.

T he rest of the night is uneventful.

Carys has decided to sleep in Emerson’s room to help her with Elodie.

So I chose to sleep on the couch tonight. She offered me her bed, but it didn’t feel right, and I’m not sure why. Hours later, as I lie here, staring at the ceiling, I realize it’s because I want to be lying in bed with her.

It will always be her.

Was I holding back to protect Carys? Or myself?

The thoughts consume me as I try to sleep.

I’ve only just closed my eyes sometime after midnight, when movement on the stairs wakes me up, and my eyes strain to see who it is. I sit up as my eyes adjust and realize it’s the woman occupying my thoughts. “Carys?”

She’s walking toward me in my old high-school football shirt, with Elodie curled into a tiny ball against her chest, and she’s singing softly to the baby.

She stops in front of me, and I reach a hand out. Unable to stop myself from touching her, I run it up the back of her bare thigh. “Is everything okay?”

“Shh... Everything’s fine,” she whispers. “Em just fed her, and Elodie was fussing, so I thought I’d give her a break and take the baby.” The moonlight filters in through the windows, bathing her in a silver glow. Her messy hair tumbles around her shoulders, and her green eyes sparkle. She looks angelic as she stands in front of me, swaying with an unhappy baby.

“Does she have one of those binky things the twins had when they were little? The things they suck on?” I try to keep my eyes on hers, but the shirt barely comes to the tops of her thighs, and there’s no way I can’t notice when those bare legs are right in front of my face.

“Oh, she does. Let me go find it... Here.” She lays Elodie against my bare chest, then steps back and sighs a sweet sigh. “I think my ovaries just exploded.”

“Is that bad?” Fuck. What if she gets sick now?

Carys giggles, and damn, what that sound does to me. “No, Cooper. It’s not bad.” Her eyes soften, and she licks her lips. “I’m going to see if the hospital sent home a binky.”

Her ass cheeks peek out with each stair she climbs, and my mouth waters.

Elodie farts, then makes a noise that sounds like she’s laughing at herself.

Can babies laugh?

I look down at her, and her violet eyes are staring back at me, wide open. “So that’s what you think of me, huh, kid?” I stand from the couch and sway side to side the way Emerson and Carys do when they’re holding her. Hoping it keeps her happy. “Your dad used to laugh when he farted too. He liked to make us all laugh, and he was good at it. He was good at a lot of things. He loved you. Your mom sent him pictures of you in her belly every week. Just so he wouldn’t miss a thing. He wanted to give you all the things he never had. Talked about it all the time.”

He should be here now, holding her. Not me. “I promise I’ll tell you all about him, okay?” I kiss her head when she fidgets against me, and my heart melts as she stills. Those eyes are Emerson’s, but man, she looks so much like Linc.

By the time Carys comes downstairs with a green binky in her hand, Elodie has fallen asleep, and I’ve fallen completely in love with this tiny human.

“You’re a natural, Coop.” She stands in front of me and covers Elodie in a tiny pink-and-white blanket. “Want me to take her from you?”

“Nah.” I sit down in the corner of the couch and kick my legs up on the ottoman. “I’ve got her. Let her sleep.”

“You look good holding her.” She sits down next to me, and our legs touch, sending an extra buzz of awareness through my skin. “How’s your incision feel?”

“Better every day.” Mostly . “The headaches are still there, but they said that could take a few more weeks.”

Carys moves her hand behind my head and starts massaging the base of my skull, and I moan. “Tell me about being home before...” I leave off the rest.

We both know I mean before the op.

Before the call.

Before Linc died.

“Chloe and I are working on a new line, using the most gorgeous French lace I’ve ever seen. It’s teal and black. It reminds me of the feather I found on the beach that night last year.” Her fingers stop for a second. “Do you remember?”

“Like I could ever forget.” I turn my head to her. “That feather’s been on every mission with me since you gave it to me.”

“Coop...” Her hand drops away, and she stands, pulling away emotionally and physically. “I’m going to take Elodie back upstairs.” She scoops the baby out of my arms and doesn’t look back.

I stand and follow her to the stairs. “Who’s running now, Carys?”

Carys turns slowly toward me. “I’m right here, fighting for us. But you need to figure out if you love me or hate me, Coop. Because this...” She motions between the two of us. “This back-and-forth, where I think I’m getting somewhere with you and then you push me away... That hurts. And I’m too tired tonight for hurt. Honestly, I don’t know how much more of it I can take without breaking.”

She leans in on shaky legs and kisses my cheek. “I know what I want, and I’ll fight for it, but don’t keep giving me hope and then tearing it away.”

“I wasn’t trying to do that . . .”

Carys places a hand on my chest. “I know. But that’s exactly what you’re doing. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. And I love you. Now, it’s time for you to figure out how you feel.” She drops her hand and turns around, taking Elodie back upstairs.

I watch her as she slips back into Emerson’s room and closes the door behind her.

I already know how I feel. It’s time to stop holding back.

I’m done watching this woman walk away.