The Sorrow of Shadows (Crimson & Shadows #1)

Chapter 19

CHAPTER NINETEEN

brEYLA

I awake the next morning with a pounding behind my eyes and a stiffness in my limbs. Normally I sleep peacefully with Elijah, but I spent the entire night in a semi-conscious state, tossing and turning constantly. Elijah is already up and in the bathing chamber getting ready for the day.

According to Aurelius's sources, Prince Ayden is set to arrive today. The thought has my stomach knotting even further. There is so much I don’t know, and the lack of control has me spiraling.

I slip from Elijah’s bed and out of his chambers. It’s early enough that I won’t be seen by many. It doesn’t take me long to reach the royal wing and my chambers. As I unlock my door, Aurelius's swings open.

Before I can voice my displeasure with him, I find myself pinned to my door, an angry-looking Aurelius staring at me. He leans into me and runs his nose along my neck, and I realize he’s smelling me .

His deep voice betrays nothing as he asks, “What are you wearing?”

Then it dawns on me; I’m still wearing Elijah’s clothes. I resist the urge to grin as I realize what’s happening.

“Something of Elijah’s,” I answer boldly, and because I can’t help myself, I taunt him further. “It’s where I just came from, actually.”

A growl escapes him as I feel the pad of his tongue lick up my neck. The feeling has shivers racing up my back, and I fight the arousal I’m feeling from his reaction. It’s completely feral and should be a red flag, but I always did love the color red.

“Go bathe, Princess,” he demands and nips my earlobe. “You smell like shit.”

He opens my door behind me and shoves me in, slamming the door behind him.

I can’t help the full laugh that escapes me as I realize I smell like Elijah. It doesn’t matter that Elijah is more of a brother to me; it would appear Aurelius doesn’t like the scent of any male on my skin.

As tempted as I am to taunt him further by keeping Elijah’s scent on me, a bath sounds amazing. I still have remnants of our activities in the woods yesterday all over me. Small twigs and leaves are wound in my hair, and there’s a slight ache to my muscles.

I quickly undress, dropping Elijah’s clothing to the ground to be laundered and returned later. There’s a fire burning, and I know I have Lyla to thank for still tending to me even when I had dismissed all my servants. I enter the bathing chamber to find the bath already drawn.

I sink into the warm water and let it relax me, washing away all of the events of the last twenty-four hours.

I take my time in the bath and emerge later, ready to face the day. Today won’t be easy, but I’m more prepared to handle it now that I feel alive again .

With my hair wrapped in a towel and a thin black robe wrapped around me, I pad across my chamber in search of clothing. When I pass the fireplace, I notice something odd burning in it. I bend down to inspect it and grab the black metal poker from next to the hearth. I use it to move the mystery item until I can see it clearly.

“Is that...clothing?” I ask aloud.

I drop the poker and look behind me where I had dropped Elijah’s borrowed clothing to find it missing.

That motherfucker. The jealous male had snuck back in my room to burn the other male’s clothing because he didn’t like his scent on me.

I sigh and move to my wardrobe. It’s obvious that this day is going to try me in more ways than I originally anticipated. I select a fitted black tunic and red waist cincher to give me a feeling of security, without being completely confined by a bodice. I need support, but I also need to be able to move freely. I could also easily dress myself in this outfit, so there was no need to call for Ophelia. I slip into my normal black leather pants, savoring how they hugged my hips but allowed me to move fluidly.

Sitting on the edge of my bed, I pull on my boots and lace them up my calves. Lastly, I tuck my knives into their right places on my body—one hidden in my boot, one openly strapped to my thigh, and a smaller dagger tucked into the front of my waist cincher. Their proximity brings me a sense of peace, and I breathe deeply.

I wrestle my waves into a braid down the center of my back, securing the end with a strip of leather. As much as I despise wearing a tiara, I know it’s proper etiquette when welcoming visiting royalty. I choose a modest gold piece with a blood-red ruby in the center. Placing the tiara on my head, I admire how the red and gold play beautifully off the golden strands that twist through my braided hair .

By the time I reach the throne room it’s late morning, and the castle is bustling with activity. My mother is sitting on her throne, my father’s seat next to her lying empty. On her right stands Aurelius, glaring daggers at Elijah as he gives his report. “Prince Ayden and his party were seen entering the city roughly a half hour ago. He should be arriving any moment.”

The Queen’s eyes remain distant, her mind seemingly a thousand miles away. She nods in understanding but doesn’t speak. She’s just as nervous as the rest of us, maybe more so. Her fingers lightly drum on the throne’s armrest. As she glances at Aurelius, a look of understanding passes between them. I’m unsure what their eyes communicate, but I’ll find out soon enough.

With that look, I’m reminded that I’m irritated with Aurelius and decide to play with fire. I stop next to Elijah and smile sweetly. “I’m sorry I’ll have to replace the tunic you lent me. Something unfortunate happened to it.”

Elijah must notice the glint in my eye, or perhaps it’s the way Aurelius is looking at us both, but he seems to know what I’m doing. He grabs me by my hip and pulls me to his side before kissing my cheek softly. “No worries, B. It’s just a tunic. You know I’m always there for whatever you might need.” I know what he means, but the way he says it has Aurelius's jaw clenching.

I move to stand beside my mother on the opposite side as Aurelius. The throne room doors open as the herald enters to announce our guests.

“Now announcing Prince Ayden Mordet II of the Kingdom of Prudia, and his companions.”

Prince Ayden enters the room, and I’m hit with a sense of déjà vu. I’ve never met this male, but something about him seems familiar. He stands tall, even with Aurelius, who stands eight inches above me. Deep brown hair frames his face, shaved closer to the side with longer curls adorning the top of his head. Amber eyes scan the room, and a grin tugs at the corner of his lips. Lips that draw my eyes to the strong jawline covered in a short but tasteful beard. Holy hell, he’s handsome.

He strides into the room and crosses it with the arrogance every royal male seems to master. He comes to a stop in front of the dais, his guards and companions a few feet behind him. My mother rises to greet him. “Welcome to the kingdom of Rimor, Prince Ayden. We were not expecting you for several more days, but we are happy to have you. I hope you find your stay comfortable.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty. I have very much looked forward to visiting your beautiful kingdom for quite some time. How lovely it is that we get to celebrate your engagement to Lord Aurelius. My condolences on the loss of King Raynor. I know how difficult death can be.” He seems genuine, but I sense the bitterness of his words. His father’s death came at the hands of my own. It was in battle, but he still holds that bitterness against our family.

Clearing her throat, my mother changes topics. “Prince Ayden, may I introduce my daughter, and general of our army, Princess Breyla.” She gestures to me, and I step forward on the dais to greet him.

The white of his teeth shines as he smiles widely. “Well of course this beautiful female is your daughter. She is simply dazzling. Queen Genevieve, I could never mistake her for anything but your blood.”

He takes my hand and lays a warm, lingering kiss on it.

When his eyes lift to mine, I smirk. “Do lines like that normally work for you, Prince?”

“Breyla!” my mother exclaims, but Ayden is unphased.

He quirks an eyebrow at me and asks, “I don’t know, Princess, does it?”

I chuckle at his boldness. “It might if I were a softer female. You’ll find nothing but rough edges here. ”

“Oh, I see plenty of soft edges on you, Breyla. At least, where it matters, that is.”

I fight the amused grin threatening to take over my face and hear a snicker behind me. No doubt Elijah finds this as entertaining as I do. We’re the only ones, though, as I hear my mother clear her throat uncomfortably. I glance over to see Aurelius's dark eyes pinning me, the red specks in his irises burning brightly. His hands are clenched, and I can tell he’s exercising all his restraint at the moment.

“You must have had a rather long journey, Prince. Why don’t I show you to your room?” I suggest, trying to ease the tension in the room. “You can rest and bathe before dinner.”

“That would be lovely, Princess.” Ayden offers me his hand as I step down from the dais.

Slipping my arm through his, I lead him out of the throne room and toward the royal wing.

We make our way down the stone corridors, the afternoon sun shining brightly through the open windows. It’s nearly the fall season, and the days are a comfortable temperature. I savor the warmth and take a deep inhale. I’m close enough to Prince Ayden now that I catch a whiff of his scent—a woodsy citrus smell that’s oddly warm.

“I must say, you are not what I was expecting, Breyla,” Ayden confesses.

“So I’ve been told,” I shrug. “I think most males are intimidated by a female in leathers.”

He eyes me up and down. “I think I’d be far more intimidated with you out of leathers.”

“You flirt shamelessly, Prince Ayden.”

“So I’ve been told,” he replies, parroting my words back to me.

I roll my eyes before teasing, “What? No pretty maidens back home to hold your interest?”

“None so pretty as you, darling.”

“Wow,” I say in awe.

“That’s exactly what I thought when I first?—”

“You’re honestly worse than Elijah. I thought he was the biggest flirt in this court. I’m really going to have to keep my eye on you.” I turn down the corridor that leads to my—and now Ayden’s—chambers. Having both Aurelius and Ayden in such close proximity was going to get interesting.

“Oh, please do, Princess. Which one is Elijah?” he asks curiously.

“The one with the long blond hair and more muscles than should be possible.” Kind of like you.

“Ah, yes. He is your mother’s advisor?”

“One of them, yes. And my best friend,” I explain.

“Hmmm,” he muses.

“Here we are,” I state as we arrive at his chambers. “This is where you’ll be staying. My room is just across the hall.” I motion to my door. “And Lord Aurelius is just next to me.”

“Lord Aurelius does not stay closer to the Queen’s chambers?” he questions, somewhat confused.

“Obviously.”

“Why?”

“I suspect he enjoys making my life hell,” I joke.

“So, she has a sense of humor,” he says with a chuckle.

“She does. But in all actuality, I don’t know. You’d have to ask one of them that question.”

“I don’t actually care that much,” he drawls.

“Hence the reason I don’t know the answer.”

Prince Ayden steps into his room and looks around. “I think we’ll get along just fine, Breyla.”

“We’ll see,” is all I say before shutting the door and leaving him to prepare for dinner.

Dinner that night is nothing less than I expected: an utter shit show.

Due to Prince Ayden’s early arrival and the large party of people accompanying him, we are forced to have dinner in the formal dining room rather than the private room reserved for the royal family. It easily sits thirty rather comfortably, and nearly every seat is filled when I enter. The queen sits at the head of the table, Aurelius to her right while the spot to her left is left open for me.

I cross the stone floor, the slight heel of my shoe clicking as I walk. I had changed out of my previous outfit and into a floor length blood-red dress. It’s made of silk and hugs every curve down to my hips, then flares out into a flowy skirt. The neckline is a sweetheart cut with lace details that accentuate my breasts. Full-length sleeves made of the same lace end in a design that loops around my middle fingers.

I left my hair as it was, my gold and ruby diadem still sitting in place atop my braid. As I reach my seat, I notice that instead of Elijah to my left, Prince Ayden occupies that spot. To his left sits Ophelia, then Elijah with his arm slung across the back of her chair, his fingers tracing the curve of her shoulder. Across from Prince Ayden, a beautiful golden-haired female sits next to Aurelius.

She smiles sweetly then casts her gaze on Aurelius. “Hello, Aurelius,” she practically sings. Her voice is sweet and smooth like honey. It rings with a tone of familiarity that catches my attention. Who is this female?

“Princess Breyla, I don’t think you’ve been properly introduced to my cousin, Lady Charlotte,” Prince Ayden announces. “ Of course, you’re already well acquainted with Lord Aurelius, Charlie. No need to introduce you.”

Both Aurelius's and Lady Charlotte’s eyes narrow at Prince Ayden. Prince Ayden just smirks as he takes a sip of his wine.

A blush creeps up Charlotte’s cheeks, and she clears her throat. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Princess.”

“Please, just Breyla. Or General if you prefer. And likewise,” I force out as evenly as I can. The heat I feel coursing through my veins would suggest it is not a pleasure to meet her.

Her blonde hair shines in a way that I know it would be silky to the touch. Her eyes are a shade of blue that reminds me of the baby’s breath that grows outside the palace walls. Alabaster skin, so smooth and flawless, serves as a reminder that mine is scarred and calloused by years of battle and training. She’s lean with a petite frame, not an ounce of fat—or muscle—on her. While I’m above the average height of women in our kingdom, she stands several inches taller than me and has the legs any male would want to part. Ones that, apparently, Aurelius has already parted.

Charlotte is everything I’m not. Her resemblance to my mother doesn’t escape me, and it has my gut churning. Where Aurelius is dark like my shadows, they are both bright. They contrast him in a way that’s beautiful and just seems so natural. They’re both graceful, soft spoken, and carry themselves in a gentle manner. I’m loud, mouthy, and sometimes brash. I’ve never been insecure about my looks, and honestly, I shouldn’t even care when it comes to him, but I can’t help but wonder why he pursues me. He clearly has a type—a mold I don’t fit.

“Though she doesn’t look like it, Charlie has quite the mind for strategy. She serves as one of my advisors. From what I hear about you, General, you might find you have more in common than you think.” I don’t miss the insinuation in his statement. I immediately tense, because there is no way he should know that we have that in common.

I glance around to see if anyone else understands what he is suggesting. I see Elijah giving him a curious look, but he doesn’t say anything.

“Ah, so we have her to thank as well for the attacks on our border villages?” I challenge. Everyone stiffens, as if they didn’t expect me to call him out over our evening meal.

Prince Ayden lets out a loud laugh as he turns to me, draping an arm around the back of my chair. “I’m quite sure I don’t know what you’re talking about, General.” His amber eyes stare directly into mine, almost urging me to continue my accusations.

Before I can let my mouth run wild, I’m interrupted by the servants entering with the first course. I turn my attention to my wine, drowning my unease in the crimson liquid as a warm, hearty vegetable soup is placed before me. The smell has my mouth watering as I patiently wait for everyone to be served.

As the warm broth fills my belly, I hear my mother speak for the first time this evening. “So, Prince Ayden, when might we expect to hear of a coronation ball for yourself?” Her tone is polite and inquisitive, but I know she’s probing for information.

The spymaster, Lord Craylor, sits several seats down from Charlotte, but I see his gaze snap to my mother at the question.

“Well, seeing as it requires that I take a queen before I can take the throne...” Ayden’s voice trails off, “I imagine it will be about the same time Breyla takes her throne.” The number of details he seems to know about our court is unsettling.

“So, the fifth of never? That’s fantastic news,” Aurelius snaps, his tone dripping with disdain.

“You seem to have lost your diplomacy, Lord Aurelius.” Ayden is clearly not amused by Aurelius right now.

“Well, it’s a good thing I’m not acting in the capacity of a diplomat presently.”

The animosity between them is clear, but the reason is not. Ayden has been pushing buttons all day, but he’s been pushing everyone’s—not just Aurelius’s. No, there’s something more to this .

I glance down to my hands, tightly gripping my silverware, to see shadows creeping down my hand and weaving between my fingers. Now is not the time for me to lose control.

“Tell me, Breyla, when do you plan to take your place as queen?” Ayden turns the questioning back to me.

I feel my pulse quicken and more shadows crawl down my skin as I fight to gain control of the panic taking over. I glance across the table at Aurelius to see him looking at me with something that looks suspiciously like concern.

As our eyes connect, I instantly feel my heart rate slow. All at once, I can breathe again, and my panic recedes. I close my eyes, taking a deep breath, and call my shadows back into me.

“Oh, probably the sixth of never, seeing as it requires that I take a husband. But you know how that goes, Prince,” I chuckle. “There aren’t exactly a lot of males lining up for the job of being tied to me.”

Ayden leans close and whispers in my ear, “They’re all fools.”

I turn my head to him and whisper back, “Oh, don’t mistake me, Prince—I don’t want the job. What would be foolish is assuming I want anything more than what I have right now.”

He says nothing, but just smirks and leans back into his seat.

The first course is cleared from the table, and the main course is served. I hear Charlotte engaging Aurelius in conversation about trivial matters, but he smiles at her and carries on as if they are old friends. Which, of course, they are if Ayden is to be believed. I find myself wishing it were me he was giving that smile to.

It’s a question from Ophelia that has my attention. “Prince Ayden, I’ve heard rumors that there is no shortage of willing and appropriate matches in your kingdom. What keeps you from marrying?”

Ayden turns his attention to Ophelia and takes a moment to appraise her before responding. “Willing? Yes. But the rest of your statement is wrong. I would not consider them...appropriate for my kingdom.”

“And what would make one the right fit for your kingdom?” I can tell Ophelia is just genuinely curious and perhaps trying to keep the topic of conversation away from me.

“For one, they would need a brain. I’m fairly certain most of the interested parties are missing that. I need a queen who isn’t just a pretty face, but someone who is my equal. I don’t want someone to bear my children; I want a female who strengthens and pushes me. Power and beauty are nice, but my kingdom needs character.”

I’m taken back by his answer, not because of what he says but because it seems like the first genuine thing he’s said so far. This is the first I’ve seen of the true Ayden, and it’s not what I expected.

“Why so many questions, Lady Ophelia? Are you interested in the position?” Ayden quips, his mask firmly back in place.

Ophelia blushes, and Elijah shifts uncomfortably next to her.

It’s my turn to laugh at Ayden. “Pardon me, Ayden, but Lady Ophelia is far too good for you. Besides, you can’t have her. She’s one of the few females I care for. You’ll have to find another.”

He laughs with me and agrees, “Well, you’re probably right about that. She seems far above my station.”

This has the entire table laughing and the mood shifts to something lighter as we finish the main course.

As dessert is served, Charlotte is deep in conversation with Aurelius, and she places her hand atop his. “Would you care to show me the town tonight, Aurelius?” she asks with a coy grin plastered on her face. He takes notice of the offer in her eyes. There is no heat in the look he gives her.

I’m unsure if I’m more pissed that she’s touching him or that she’s offering herself in front of everyone in the room, including my mother—his future wife. The pure audacity of this female.

Before he says anything, I let my shadows creep under the table and wrap around his leg, their cool presence a reminder there are other people watching. I feel his muscles tense, and he turns his gaze to me. There is heat in the look he gives me as he blatantly ignores Charlotte’s offer.

“General, there are some things for the ball that I need to pick up from a shop in town. I heard you were headed there after dinner. Would you care to join me?”

I have no such plans, but I play along. “Yes, I need to see a male about a sword. I’d be happy to accompany you.”

Next to me, Ayden rolls his eyes. “I’m sure you can find some other male to give you a tour, Charlie.”

Charlotte stays quiet, but her eyes shoot daggers at her cousin.

I pull my shadows back and the rest of the meal continues without incident.