Until the World Falls Down

Chapter 29 .2

Why me?

I couldn’t stop my thoughts as hot tears rolled down my cheeks.

Why me?

Why was I the one who had to lose everything?

“You promised,” I choked out, trembling again. “You promised the labyrinth would give me what I wanted if I completed it. So why—why am I alone? Why did everyone else get what they wanted but me?”

I shook my head, catching my reflection again. I ripped at the dress, tearing it off my body. “I don’t get a playful, deep love like Paloma and Neima have. I don’t get familiar love like Dio and Luliana. I don’t get an enduring love like Aki and Cas. I don’t get a desirous love like Morgan and Karim. I don’t get an obsessive love like Silas or a self-affirming love like Rielle. I don’t get a platonic love like Isla… ”

I wrapped my arms around myself, letting out a shuddered breath as I stood vulnerable in my room.

“I don’t get your love like Evangeline does,” I whispered, the words hurting worse than anything else had.

My tears came harder, faster, blurring my reflection.

“It’s not fair. Why, out of all these kinds of love, do I not even get one ?”

I fell back a step, nearly slipping, glancing down to find a silky piece of lingerie under my foot.

My first instinct was to run. To get far away from this place. To ignore reality and convince myself it was okay.

You deserve to be surrounded by those who cherish you, not those who take you for granted.

Enver’s words rang through my mind, and a choked sob came out of my mouth. He was right. I deserved more than this. But I couldn’t just let Enver tell me I deserved better. I had to believe it myself, too. I had to want it for myself.

And I did. I wanted it desperately.

Which meant I couldn’t run anymore. If I wanted to start over, I had to face heartbreak head-on.

Tears still streamed down my face as I took a deep breath and a shaky step forward and began to clean up. I found a trash bag and threw out all the evidence of Julian’s cheating, threw out every gift I’d gotten him, threw out every photo and every memory. It hurt. Hurt to breathe, hurt to relive every memory as I sorted through our belongings. But I kept going. The heavier the trash bag grew, the lighter my heart did.

By the time I finished, night had fallen, and my outside trash barrel was full. My tears had dried, and my hands no longer shook, but the hollow ache in my chest remained. I wasn’t sure it would ever disappear. But I knew Julian didn’t cause it. No, that part of me belonged to Enver. And it would never heal because I would never see Enver again.

I stared down at the garbage’s overflowing contents for a moment before slamming the lid shut, locking the pain and the past away.

Once back inside, I went straight to my laptop. I opened my e-mails to find over fifty waiting for me from the design company I worked for, each one getting progressively angrier than the last. I didn’t bother reading them. I was getting rid of everything that reminded me of the person I was.

Including this shitty job.

I sent off my resignation e-mail and then signed out of everything company related. I had enough money saved up to get through as long as I needed until I figured out what I wanted to do next. Especially now that I wasn’t funding Julian, Veronica, or my mom.

A weightless feeling washed over me. For once in my life, I had no responsibilities, no obligations. No one depended on me, and I wouldn’t depend on anyone else again. And even though my heart was shattered and my soul was heavy, I felt…

Not quite happy, but like I could get there.

I stood in the kitchen, absentmindedly reorganizing some of the decor, when my gaze passed over my fruit bowl.

Peaches.

A pang shot through me, and I turned away, my hands trembling.

Don’ t, I warned myself. He’s with Evangeline . He will have his happily ever after with her. He deserves it.

And I deserved…

A knock at my front door tore me from my thoughts. My heart raced as I approached it. Was it Julian? My mother? What did they want?

I cautiously opened it, blinking in surprise at the sight of Liana standing on my doorstep. “Liana?”

“Nell!” she said and smiled widely, the relief in her voice evident. “Thank goodness. I was worried about you.”

My grip on the doorknob tightened .

Her mouth fell open, her hand shooting over it. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I looked up your address in our system. I didn’t mean to intrude on your privacy, but I was worried something was wrong. You always come to the library three times a week, so when you missed this entire week without warning, I got concerned. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

A lump formed in my throat. “I’m okay.”

Her gaze softened, a frown crossing her face. “Are you?”

“Yes,” I said, choking on my words, tears falling down my cheeks again.

“Sweetie, what’s wrong?” she asked, not hesitating to wrap her arms around me. “It’s okay.”

I shook my head, trying to get the tears to stop, but it was useless. “My boyfriend and I broke up,” I told her, knowing no one would believe anything I said about the labyrinth.

“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry,” she murmured, holding me closer. “You must be devastated. If you want to talk about it, I’m here for you.”

I didn’t say anything, standing in her embrace, basking in her comfort. I didn’t know I needed it until she offered it. She rubbed my back until my tears dried, then pulled back and smoothed my hair. “Sorry,” I apologized, my voice scratchy.

“Don’t apologize. We all need someone to comfort us sometimes.”

“Thank you for worrying about me,” I said, my voice catching again. “It means more than you know.”

She smiled at me, warm and caring, and then her face lit up. She opened her side bag, digging around until she pulled out a book and handed it to me. “Here. I saw this at the bookstore and thought you’d like it.”

I took the book, a wobbly smile taking over my face. I couldn’t remember the last time someone had bought me something. “Thank you.”

“I heard it’s really romantic. ”

“I might hold off on reading romance for a bit,” I replied honestly, clutching the book to my chest. “I’m having a hard time believing in happily ever after right now.”

Liana placed her hand on my arm. “Happy endings are not always about love, dear.”

“I know, but…”

“Have you ever heard the saying, the sun is still shining even when clouds hide it from sight? Your happily ever after is still out there, Nell, even if you can’t see it right now. It will reappear. Don’t give up hope. I truly believe you will have the happy ending you desire.”

I swallowed hard. “What if I gave up my happily ever after instead of losing it?”

“Then that would be a tragedy, dear,” she said softly, “because your happily ever after is something worth fighting for.”

“It’s too late,” I whispered.

“Is it?” she asked. “Your story isn’t over, Nell. You’ve spent so much time putting others first. Now it’s time to prioritize yourself. Have courage.”

Have courage .

My hand went to my neck, where Dio’s faded bite mark lay imprinted in my skin. Dio had found courage. I could, too.

Liana squeezed my arm gently before letting go, smiling at me again. “I should go. If you ever want to talk or just want some company, you know where to find me.”

“Liana, wait,” I called as she began to walk off, my heart pounding in my chest. “I might not be at the library for a while.”

Her smile grew. “I’ll see you when I see you, then. Go get your happily ever after, Nell.”

I needed to get back to the club.

I rushed back into my house, searching for my purse and phone, and it hit me belatedly that they were both left and lost in Enver’s castle. My keys, too. I groaned. Shit . My car. It was still at the club—if it hadn’t been towed yet.

I found my spare key and hurried out the door, not wanting to waste any more time. Who knew how much time had already passed in Enver’s world? The thought had my pace quickening until I was half-running back to the club. When I arrived, I sighed in relief, finding my car still parked there. A handful of brightly colored tickets were tucked under the windshield wiper, but that beat paying an impound fee. I stashed my key under the wheel well before turning to the club’s entrance and walking up to it.

To where I’d first met Enver.

My steps faltered, my throat closing up. What if I was setting myself up for more heartbreak? What if I was too late?

Shaking my head, I swallowed my fears and forced myself forward. I hadn’t given Enver a chance to see if he would choose me. I’d run, like I’d always done, even if it was with good intentions this time. I hadn’t fought for him—I’d let him go.

That was something the old Nell would do. I wasn’t going to give up so easily. I wanted to at least try to fight for my happily ever after.

My pulse quickened as I entered the club. It was nearly empty, too early in the night for a crowd, and no one paid any attention to me as I walked around, unsure of what to do. I tried calling for Enver under my breath, standing about where I thought I stood before, but nothing happened.

Maybe he couldn’t sense me yet. I settled into a booth, waiting.

And waiting.

The minutes ticked by, and I started to fidget. Enver had found me through the labyrinth’s curse last time. What if he couldn’t now because the curse had been lifted?

My heart sunk further with every passing hour, and as eleven o’clock hit, the club started to fill up. Couples came together on the packed dance floor, the speakers playing a slow, sensual beat. I watched, trying to ignore that hollow ache within me, pushing aside the whispering voice in my head.

He’s not coming.

He won’t ever come.

I shook my head, trying to disperse the cruel voice.

He’s gone.

“No,” I said out loud.

Gone.

Forever .

I didn’t know when I started crying again. All I knew was that it hurt. It hurt to know he was gone. To know he wasn’t coming back no matter how much I waited, no matter how much I cried.

I remained in the booth even as the club emptied. I barely heard the bartender’s words when he came to escort me out. I declined his help when he asked if I needed any. Said no to a ride home. Ignored him when he asked if there was anyone he could call.

It just made me cry harder.

I walked away from the bartender, not caring where I was going. My feet brought me to the alleyway Enver had led me to before. To the door that didn’t exist anymore. Only a brick wall remained now. I placed my hand against it, the rough texture scraping against my palm. My lips trembled as I let out a harsh breath. There was no evidence Enver even existed. No way back to him.

Only my memories and the dress on my bedroom floor that belonged to his lover remained.

I put my back to the brick, feeling it dig into my back as I sunk down to the pavement, the tears still flowing.

I knew what I was doing made me more pathetic. I knew this wasn’t the person I wanted to be anymore. That I didn’t want to be desperate anymore.

But I was. I was desperate and lonely and hurting and pathetic.

Just for now , I told myself, leaning my head back against the brick, my eyes falling shut as I tilted my head up toward the night sky.

I would allow myself to fall apart just for now.

Then, I would do as Enver told me to do. I would put myself back together and move on. I would forget him. I would try to be happy without him. I would wait for the clouds to part and the sun to shine.

But for now, I would miss him.

I would miss him entirely. Endlessly.

Desperately.

“Enver,” I sobbed. His name was the only part of him I had left, and I clung to it, repeating it over and over as the tears fell faster. “Enver…”

A gentle caress on my cheek made my heart aching harder. The wind resembled his touch, how he dried my tears. It brushed against my other cheek and I leaned into the invisible sensation, allowing myself to imagine it was him, that he was here with me now, soothing me.

Fingertips stroked my skin, and then a phantom caress of lips followed, tracing the path of my tears, kissing away the wetness.

My breath caught.

A hand cradled my cheek, a thumb skimming it gently.

“I told you not to give into your desperation again,” he murmured.

I trembled, unable to gather the courage to open my eyes. Too afraid I was imagining it all. Not wanting to lose the illusion yet. “You said you wouldn’t come even if I did.”

“I lied, my little lover,” he said, his confession tickling my lips. “I lied because I knew I would be too weak to stay away from you if you called for me again.”

His answer encouraged me to open my eyes, needing to see him, risking the illusion for the chance that he was truly there. His black, tousled hair that curled at the nape of his neck met my gaze first. Then the sharp curve of his jawline, the contrasting softness of his lips, the slope of his nose, the thickness of his dark lashes…

Then, as if he could not wait any longer for our eyes to meet, he tilted my chin up, forcing me to gaze into his obsidian ones.

“Enver,” I whispered, my voice cracking.

He was here.

I wanted to kiss him. To touch him. But as my head moved toward his, and his eyes fluttered shut, I stopped myself, pulling back.

He wasn’t mine anymore.

His body tensed, like I’d made him uncomfortable, and shame filled me. I had almost kissed an engaged man. I wanted to break away from his touch, but he held onto me, refusing to let go. He looked exhausted as he looked down at me, dark circles under his eyes, his skin paler than usual. Unable to keep eye contact, my eyes trailed down to his chest, finding his scar, and suddenly my throat was closing in alarm. If Enver was here, then…

“You’re still cursed?” I asked, stricken, meeting his gaze again, my heart hurting for a different reason now. “No! That can’t be. You have your heart back. Why are you here? Why did the labyrinth lead you to me again? You can’t still be trapped, Enver, that’s not fair?—”

“I am not,” he cut in, his voice gentle and soothing as he took my hand in his own and placed it against his chest. “Evangeline undid the curse. I am free of the labyrinth. ”

I went still, feeling his heart’s steady, comforting beat under my palm. It really was back.

He was free.

“How…?” I started, overwhelmed with awe and confusion.

“I do not have long,” he told me, his grip on my hand tightening. “This magic will not allow me to remain here for more than a few moments.”

So, I’ll lose you again? The thought burst into my mind, the pain returning, but worse than before. One goodbye had been hard enough. How would I survive two?

His gaze softened, and in a heart-stopping moment, I recognized the expression on his face—the affection in his eyes, the tenderness, and the longing. It was the same look he’d given Evangeline when Kayn had poisoned her, and she lay limp in his arms, now directed at me. One that could mend shattered hearts and make broken dreams come true. One not meant for me.

Why are you looking at me like that ? I wanted to ask, but the words clogged in my throat, the intensity of his expression taking my breath away.

“Come with me, Nell,” Enver murmured, his request quiet and sincere.

Come with him ? As in…

His warm breath washed across my lips as he moved closer, his hand crushing mine to his chest, forcing me to feel how his heartbeat quickened.

“I cannot stay here,” he told me, “but I cannot leave without you. My heart may have been returned to me, but my chest still feels hollow. A part of me remains within you. I have told you before—I will not be whole without you. I need you. Come with me. Please.”

My heart stuttered in response to his words, its pace matching his own heart’s rapid tempo. “But you’re engaged,” was all I could say .

“No,” he said quietly. “Verofer was engaged. I am not that man anymore. I will never be that man again.”

“What? But Evangeline?—”

“She understands what you are to me. Even before I was cursed, I realized—” Enver cut himself off suddenly, distracted by shadows that began to dance along his skin. He glanced down at them, then our entwined hands, and then back at my face, a grave look crossing his face. “The magic is fading. Do not worry about Evangeline. You have to make a decision. Quickly. I will answer all your questions later.”

My heart pounded. This wasn’t an easy decision. I had so many questions, not enough answers, and not enough time. He was asking me to leave my world behind. To leave my life behind. Everything. For him.

It hit me then—I barely knew Enver. Even more so now that he had his heart and memories back. If I thought about it, the majority of our relationship had been based on lust. Yet, even so, I’d been so ready to stay in the labyrinth with him. I’d felt the same draw he said he’d felt toward me. The same sense of knowing. Of need.

“Will I ever be able to come back here if I go with you?” I asked, my mouth going dry.

“When Evangeline recovers, it should be possible,” he responded, a slight edge to his tone as if displeased by my question. “You will not have to leave your world forever, but I cannot guarantee when she will be able to transport you back here again. She needs to regain her strength first. Breaking the curse has exhausted her magic.”

I considered it. If I said yes, it wouldn’t be forever. I could come back eventually and settle things I would need to settle. If I said no, I would lose Enver forever.

“I want it to be your decision this time,” Enver said, his hand tightening around mine. “I have chosen you, but I will not force you to choose me. ”

I already knew my answer. I already had thought I lost him once. I wouldn’t lose him again.

“Say yes. Come with me, my little lover,” Enver coaxed, the shadows growing thicker, the seconds slipping through our entwined fingers. He was so close to me I could taste his breath as he spoke and feel his pulse thrumming rapidly under my palm, betraying his calm exterior. “I have chosen you, so choose me. Let me be selfish and steal you away. Let me love you the way I could not before. The way I wanted to before.”

A rush of air left my lungs, his words filling the hollowness I carried, lifting the weight that bore me down. That was right. Enver could love me now. No longer would it be an empty promise—it was a vow. He would be mine, and I would be his.

“What if I can’t love you properly?” I asked, the last of my worries slipping through my lips. “Would you still want me?”

“There will never be a time I do not want you, my little lover,” Enver responded, his gaze steady, his voice firm. “Heart or not. Love or not. I will always want you. I will always be yours.”

“Until when?” I whispered.

“Until the world falls down,” he promised.

And I gave in to him, as I always did.

Willingly and without hesitation.

But this time, he was giving himself to me, too.

Enver sensed my answer before I even opened my mouth. His lips descended on mine, my breathless yes swallowed by his kiss. It was hungry, greedy, and claiming. And as his arms and shadows wrapped around me, dragging me into him, the world fell away around us, replaced by the overwhelming sensation of being complete—the one only Enver could provide me with.

“Yes, I’ll come with you,” I told him between kisses, and he drew me closer, holding me like something precious.

“My favorite word,” he breathed, then rose, gathering me against his chest .

I wrapped my arms around his neck, and the shadows responded to our embrace, weaving around us, binding us together as we kissed once more.

“We will both learn how to love each other,” Enver promised softly against my lips as the darkness swirled and deepened around us. “Together.”

“Together,” I echoed as the shadows finally engulfed us entirely, ready to spirit us away.

To begin our happily ever after.

I smiled in the dark, realizing the labyrinth had given me what I wanted in the end.

Enver.