Wasted Time (The Steel City #1)

17. Penny

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

penny

Declan stopped trying to get a hold of me around dinner time. I avoided my phone, but I could hear each ‘buzz’ of his text messages throughout the day. Thankfully, with Avery being so submersed in her own excitement, she didn’t have the capacity to clock how differently I was behaving. And I was. I was acting like I was hiding a damn body in my trunk.

When I am in town, Gavin and I usually check-in non-stop. She hasn’t seemed to notice that I have not touched my phone since I stepped through the door. The issue was never that he and I didn’t get along. We got along too well, to be frank. I think we probably should have just stayed friends.

Gavin might not be the funniest person in the world, but he’s sturdy. He is the absolute best person to have near when you need advice. He has the wicked ability of seeing every situation from every angle. He is pure practicality and logic, and I loved that support and reliability at the start. Now, looking back at it, we always missed each other when there was a bit of distance between us. But never nearly enough .

I finally crawl into Avery’s spare room after going for ice cream and grabbing my bags from my parents. I had to endure my mom fawning over the ring while watching me carefully out of the corner of her eye. She knows, of course. I told her not to bring it up and ruin Avery’s news. She’s worried. My dad’s crushed. It was exhausting watching them put on a show for her.

I pull the blankets over my body and muster the courage to look at my phone.

Declan left no messages, but he called a handful of times, hanging up the second my voicemail message hit.

And he did text.

Sighing, I brace myself and open the thread.

Declan

Where did you go?

Lucky.

Talk to me. Please.

Just let me know you’re not dead or something.

Please don’t make me call Ave.

Real mature sneaking out before I wake up. Even more mature, letting me worry while you’re eating ice cream.

Don’t worry about starting over at twenty-nine. You still behave like you’re nineteen— you’ll be fine. I won’t expect to be followed back on Instagram anytime soon.

Shutting my eyes, I let the sting of his words engulf me. I press the corner of my phone to my forehead.

Ouch.

That was probably deserved, but my god, did he aim to kill.

That dull ache sprouts in my chest again. I assume he talked to Seth because I was with Avery all day and she never mentioned him. I hope he kept his cool enough to not give away what happened last night. That is the last thing I need while the rest of this mess explodes at my feet.

I might have snuck out while Declan snored. I might have gathered my things like a ghost in the night and slid out of the hotel room without leaving a note. Like an idiot, I might have ignored his calls and texts. But I was overwhelmed. I was heartbroken and scared and I was staring at a picture of my best friend’s ring on that finger.

I had been vulnerable with him last night. I told him things I’ve never told another soul. Bared myself in a way I’ve never been able to do before.He threw it back in my face the second he was angry with me.

Twenty-nine and alone. Yeah, it sucks even worse hearing it from someone else’s mouth, used as a weapon to maim me.

This feels even worse than that night at The Swan Dive when he went off on me about Gavin, worse than that last text he had sent me when he was angry with me. Even though he turned out to be right about all of it, none of it was necessary. The things he says are never necessary.

Now, he picked up the sharp little broken bits of my heart that I let him look at and tossed them back at me, piercing my skin and drawing blood.

I shouldn’t have crossed that line with him last night.

This is exactly why.

Declan Lowes may be in my orbit, but I can still keep my distance. I feel like that might be the only option left to save us from strangling the life out of one another.