Wrath (Dirty Soul MC: Long Beach #2)

Chapter 21

“ A re ya sure about this?” Raze checks as I start heading along the balcony toward the room where the woman he wants me to talk to is staying.

“Of course, I’m sure. If she knows something about Cliff that can help you find him, I want to help.”

“What if it’s too traumatic? What if what happened to her is the same as–”

I stop walking and stare up at him. “Raze, I’m fine, you asked me to do this for a reason. I like that I’m not the helpless, younger sister for once.” Continuing to walk to her room, I smile at Sasquatch who’s sitting on a chair outside her door.

“A private bodyguard, why don’t I get this special treatment?” I glance up at my brother and smile. I know that what I’m about to do won’t be easy, but I want him to at least believe that I’m strong enough to handle it.

“He’s here for your safety too, Anita ain’t quite wired right,” he tells me under his breath.

“I heard she killed her husband,” Sasquatch adds, in his low, monotone voice.

“Apparently, he deserved it.” Raze quickly clears his throat and knocks on the door. “If you need me, I’ll be right out here. Be calm and…well… just be yourself.” He smiles at me, and when the door opens I’m very surprised by the sight of the woman who answers.

“Anita, this is Eden, my sister. She thought you might like some company.” Raze practically pushes me through the door, and I look back over my shoulder at him and scowl.

“I’d love company, here take a seat.” The smartly dressed middle-aged woman leads me over to the two-seater couch that's on the other side of the room. “It’s lovely here, isn’t it? And we're just high enough to see the ocean over that building. I’ve only ever seen the ocean once before.” Anita seems so cheerful and friendly, I find it very hard to believe that she could ever have committed a murder.

“It’s pretty, once you see past the rusty old clubhouse,” I laugh nervously as I take a seat on the couch. “I heard you traveled a long way to get here?” I ease into conversation. Raze has briefed me on what he needs to find out, and I’m hoping this woman is gonna make it easy. “Did you like where you were staying before?” I do my best to sound casual.

“I love it, there's a beautiful garden there. I grow my own flowers, really pretty ones. I noticed you have some flowers here, did you plant them?” She takes my hand in hers and starts to inspect it.

“No, I’ve only just got here, myself,” I admit, still struggling to believe that this lovely lady could be dangerous even if she is a little odd.

“Very clean.” She releases my hand when she’s satisfied. “Did they break you out of somewhere too?”

I shake my head and smile back at her.

“Actually I came running to them.” The words sound so ironic when I think back to how long I spent avoiding this place.

“Mmmm. The men here are different from Cliff. They look scary, but there’s a kindness inside them.” Anita seems confused by her own observation.

“You knew Cliff well?” I dive right in, despite my fear of what this conversation could unravel.

“He never used to be mean, there was a time when he was kind.” She closes her eyes as if she can transport herself back to that time. “I never thought a man like him would pay me any attention, I was so plain, and boring. My parents were strict. Mom used to make me wear silly dresses like I was still a child. But somehow, Cliff noticed me.” Her eyes open back up and although they look sad, she’s smiling. “This club was barely anything back then. It had just been put together in Colorado, and Cliff was so excited about being a part of it. He’d pick me up on his motorcycle a few blocks away from our house so my parents wouldn’t see, and we’d ride for miles. He always knew the prettiest places to take me, and we’d stay there for hours just talking.” Her smile doesn’t falter as she recalls her memories with that monster.

“What would you talk about?” I ask, trying hard to picture a younger, less evil Cliff in my head.

“Everything, and then sometimes nothing at all. We just enjoyed each other's company.” It’s much easier for me to imagine a young, na?ve Anita because it feels like she’s right here in the room with me.

“So, what happened?” I hate to strip away the good stuff, but the good stuff isn’t what led us here.

“He didn’t want to admit it at the time, but I knew we couldn’t be together. And my parents weren’t the only problem, the club he’d sworn himself to was doing all kinds of illegal things. I didn’t want to be part of that. I was falling in love with him and I knew that if I let myself go all the way, there would be no coming back. I just wanted a happy life, with a husband and children who didn’t have to visit their father in jail.” Her smile slowly starts to fade as she leaves the young, and in love, Anita in the past and returns to the present.

“Telling him we couldn't see each other anymore was awful.” She stares down at her hands and when I notice that they’re shaking, I place mine over the top of them.

“He didn’t take it well, did he?”

“Better than I expected, he was sad, but he understood my reasons. I was devastated, but I knew I’d done the right thing. I just wanted a peaceful life, a happy one like my own parents had.”

“And had the two of you…? Did you ever…?” It’s awkward being so invasive, but I’m curious by nature. Raze tells me Cliif was obsessed with this woman.

“Were we intimate?” She laughs. “No, I was a good Christian girl, just kissing him made me blush.”

“Okay, so if he accepted that it wouldn’t work out back then, where did it all go wrong?” I know this isn’t how the story ends, she wouldn’t have ended up in the care home if it did.

“This color really suits you, it brings out your eyes.” Anita strokes her hand over the sleeve of my top and puts on a fake smile.

“Anita, what happened?” I squeeze her hand a little tighter, hoping that she feels comfortable enough to open up.

“I met Peter at church a few months later. He was new in town and very handsome. He had a stable job and just the right amount of charm. My parents liked him. Everyone liked him.” She exhales slowly.

“Did you like him?” I furrow my brow.

“Yes, I liked him very much. So much, that when he asked me to marry him, I said yes.” She looks down and when I notice that her wedding ring is still on her finger, I’m even more confused, who the hell kills their husband, then continues to wear their ring?

“We were going to be so happy.” A tear drips onto her hand and when I wrap my arm around her shoulder to offer her some comfort, I can’t help remembering how much hope I had for me and Wrath.

“Cliff must have found out about the wedding.” Anita snuffles and quickly dries her tears. “He broke into my bedroom the night before and begged me not to go through with it.”

“And did–”

“He raped me.” She turns her head to look at me, and the blank expression she’s wearing puts a lump in my throat.

“I’m so sorry.” Tears of my own threaten to release, and when I glance at the door, I fight against the temptation to run to it.

“He took me like a whore, he stole what I’d been holding onto for my wedding night as if it meant nothing to him. And the whole thing was nothing like what I expected. It made me look back at our time together and hate myself for ever wanting it to be him who I gave it to.” Flashes of the night Aaron was forced to take my virginity start to distract me. It appears Cliff likes taking things by force. I remember all the loud jeers and the way Aaron looked at me while the moment that was supposed to be so special was stolen from us both.

“Once he’d done that, he turned me on my front and pushed my face into the pillow, I thought I was gonna suffocate. I thought he was going to kill me, and then when he pushed himself into my…” She takes crisp white tissue from her watch and dabs her eyes. “...I started to wish I was suffocating just so I could know it would end.” She bursts into tears and I have to remind myself to breathe as I continue to hold her. There were many nights I’d spent at the house after he took me when I’d have those same dark thoughts.

“He just got up and left when he was done. I lay on the bed feeling numb until the sun rose, and Mom came to my room to wake me up. Then I put on my wedding dress and walked up the aisle.” She blinks back more tears as she explains.

“I married Peter and I smiled at all the people who came to watch.” My heart is breaking for her, and it sinks to my stomach when I start to realize that nothing about what she’s telling me is gonna help lead the club to Cliff.

“That night, when Peter and I went to bed, I was so sore but I knew I had a duty. I pretended to enjoy it because it’s what a wife should do.” Her eyes narrow and her voice gets weaker. “He kept asking me over and over if I'd lain down with someone before. He wanted to know why I hadn’t bled for him. I had no answers, I couldn’t tell him the truth. Our wedding night was the first time Peter struck me.” Her hand lifts up to touch her cheek as if she can still feel the sting. “He called me a liar, told me I’d misled him. He beat me so badly that I had to stay indoors for two weeks.” The laugh she makes is a sad one. “I pushed everyone I cared about away because I felt so humiliated. That’s when it really started.”

“When what first started?” I ask curiously.

“My journey to hell.” I watch her tuck her tissue back in place and pull herself together again, “ First, I let Peter isolate me, he quickly moved us to a new town, where I didn’t know anybody. Then I let him control me because I started to believe all the things he was telling me were true.”

“And Cliff? Did you ever hear from him again?” Raze told me Anita is convinced he’s been watching her, we need to find out if that paranoia is part of her illness or if he really is still in contact with her.

“Yes.” She swallows thickly. “He showed up at our house about two months after the wedding while Peter was at work. He raped me in our kitchen. Then he came again a year later, dragged me up the stairs, and raped me in our bed. He’d show up at random times; sometimes I’d go months, even years without seeing him, and just when I started to believe I’d never have to suffer him again, there he would be.”

“That’s… I’m sorry.” I have to keep reminding myself that this all has a purpose. Something about this woman was special to Cliff any clue could help.

“He always seemed to know when Peter was out of town, it was like he’d been watching and knew I’d be alone. The worst time was when I was pregnant with Richie. I was always scared, but knowing that it wasn’t just me he was hurting... That time was the worst.” She nods as more tears form in her eyes.

“It must have been awful.” I can see that she’s zoned out. There's nothing in her expression anymore, not even sadness.

“He’d walk into our home as if he expected me to be pleased to see him. Then he’d pin me down and force himself on me. He’d call me such cruel names. Sometimes, he’d get so mad at me that he’d spit in my face, but then he’d lie beside me, and hold me like we were lovers again.” Her face wrinkles with confusion.

“Did Peter ever find out?” I question her.

“Never, Cliff was too smart for that.” She shakes her head.

“And was Cliff the person who killed your husband?” I know that I’m moving into dangerous territory. This woman is supposedly unstable, but I can’t help wondering if all these years she’s been suffering the guilt of a crime she didn’t commit.

“No, I killed Peter.” She gives me that same blank stare and I realize she’s not at all remorseful for it.

“Cliff had visited that morning after Peter had left for work and Richie went to school. He’d raped me in our bed then he kissed me and promised he’d be back. He always did that. I swear he got off on knowing how much it scared me. When he left I was at my worst. My Richie was growing up so fast, every day he was needing me less and less. So my entire existence seemed to revolve around these two men, who both terrified me.” She shakes her head. “I spent that day making the house perfect for Peter to come home to, he always had to have it that way. I’d made him and Richie something for dinner so they could both eat when they got home and when all my jobs were finished I went outside to his shed. I’d heard some folk from church talking about the man who took his own life by drinking weedkiller. Peter kept the yard so well, I knew he'd have some.” She smiles at me as if she’s telling me a bedtime story and feel myself getting more and more drawn into her nightmare. “What I found in that shed was the work of the Devil himself.” Her skin turns cold under my hand and her face goes white. “There were so many of them, all of them naked and pale.” She closes her eyes and shakes her head. “He’d kept Polaroid pictures of them all. This man who had to have everything so clean, and sterile, who I’d been married to for all those years, was a monster. A worse monster than the one who’d been raping me.” She shocks me when she starts to laugh hysterically.

“He’d make Richie recite passages from the Bible, he never let me forget that I wasn’t pure when we got married. For years and years, I let him abuse me and my son.” She stares at me as if she expects me to say something. “To everyone in our congregation, I had the perfect husband, a stern but fair father, and a good man. In reality, he was a cold-blooded killer. I had to save us from him.” She startles me when she stands up and starts to pace the floor. “I headed back inside the house and I called his office. I told the receptionist that there was a family emergency at home and that he was needed here, then I took the carving knife from the block.” She holds up her hand and clutches her fist as if she’s holding it right now. “Then I waited for him,” she whispers.

“Richie, he’s your son, right?”

“Yes, he’s a very special boy.” All the tension in her face relaxes.

“Was he at home when this happened?”

“He was so brave when he came home from school.” She shakes her head. “It was done by then. It was over. Richie walked in and he could see what I’d done. I can’t remember what happened after Peter walked through the door. All I remember is the blood. It was on the walls, and on the rug my parents gave us as a wedding gift. None of it was there when I came downstairs the next morning. It was as if nothing had happened and Peter had just vanished.” She shrugs.

“What happened to the body?”

“It was gone, he was gone. We carried on with our lives, and some days would be perfect. Like Peter and Cliff never existed. I still have days like that.” She looks across to me and smiles hopefully.

“And did people ask what had happened?”

“Of course, Peter Carter quickly went from being the town hero to the man who ran out on his family. Rumors started about affairs he had and I didn’t deny them. I just went to church on a Sunday and prayed to God to forgive me and make Cliff stay away.”

“So, how did you end up in Forestb–”

“I don’t blame Richie for taking me there,” she interrupts me abruptly. “I forget things. Important things, not just about them. I couldn’t take care of myself. He didn’t want to do it, he felt bad, that day when he left me there was the first time I ever saw him cry.” She wipes away more of her own tears. “but he made the right choice, I was a danger. He had to work and I couldn’t be left alone. I never wanted to be alone, in case Cliff came back. I think I might have killed him too if he had.”

“And Richie knows nothing about what was happening with you and Cliff?”

“No, and he can’t. Richie can never find out about Cliff or that I ever had anything to do with this club. They were just reckless days that I want to forget.” She looks down at the picture she’s picked up from her bedside table and smiles at it lovingly.

“He’s handsome, isn’t he?” She passes it over so I can see for myself, and I’m quite surprised by how he appears. Richie is handsome, in his own unique way. His features are chiseled, and although he’s smiling in the picture, there's malice in his eyes.

“His girlfriend, Evangeline, took that for me. She’s good for him.” She carefully takes the picture back.

“When I moved to Forestbank, I was sure it was all over. I’d convinced myself that I’d never see Cliff again. But he found me.”

I sit up a little straighter when suddenly, I feel like we’re getting somewhere.

“Anita, when was the last time Cliff visited you?”

“I don't know, I struggle with days and times. I wake up some mornings thinking that Richie is still a little boy who needs me to make his breakfast.”

“Was it recently?” I can feel that I’m onto something. If Cliff has been visiting her, he could have at least mentioned something that could give us a clue into where he’s been hiding.

“I think the last time was just after Richie visited me for my birthday. He and Evangeline bought a cake, she’d baked it herself.”

“That’s lovely, Anita, but I need you to try and remember Cliff’s visit. Did he say anything to you?”

“He was different, a little on edge. We…he brushed my hair afterward.” She smiles at me sadly as she rises to her feet. “I think I should get some rest now, it was a long drive here.” I can tell from the look on her face that her nightmare is still ongoing. That fucker is still hurting her.

“Anita, when Cliff came to Forestbank, did he mention anything about where he was staying?”

“He never tells me anything, just that he’ll always find me.” She smiles like that young girl who enjoyed going for rides on the back of his bike as she lies down on top of the covers, and rolls onto her side.