A Miracle for the Confident Cowboy (Love in Sweet Bloom)

Chapter 15

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

It was clear that Duke was struggling with a lot and it was more than Sophie thought she was capable of helping him with. It didn’t help that she’d always felt a little at odds with him. Nor did it help that she was hiding something from him.

They were both responsible for the distance that had grown between them and she didn’t know how she was going to be able to get past it.

Sophie cared for him—deeper than what should have been possible. Part of her wanted to hate Pippa for putting each of them in the other’s path. At this point, she felt she already knew what was going to happen. She’d take the gig, move out of the country, and when she returned, they wouldn’t be able to pick up where they’d left off.

Not even the optimistic side of her could come up with reasons to have faith. Sometimes relationships didn’t have a chance. Timing was everything and they simply weren’t blessed enough to let it play its crucial role in their lives.

She spent the next couple of days in communication with her manager and avoiding Duke. While Sophie kept telling herself that she had one foot in staying in Texas and one foot already on that plane, deep down she knew she had made her choice. In a few weeks she’d be leaving.

The decision weighed heavy on her chest. Logically, she couldn’t stay. She knew that. Pippa, Rob, even her parents would be disappointed in her if she chose to let this opportunity slip through her fingers.

When there was a knock on her door, she hesitated answering it. She wasn’t sure she was ready to tell Duke what was about to happen. She didn’t want to break things off with him. Her heart had been slashed and was now being pulled into two directions. If she stayed in Texas, one part of her would have still gotten on that plane, leaving her feeling left behind. If she left, the other side of her heart would remain in Texas with Duke.

Another knock on the door, this time with more impatience drew Sophie’s attention. She just needed to enjoy the rest of the time she had with him—even if all of that time was spent looking for Gus and being there for him in the way he needed her to be.

She took a deep breath and exhaled as she headed for the door. When she pulled it open, she froze. “Pippa?”

Her friend entered, a grin on her face. “So? Have you made your decision?”

Sophie nibbled on her lower lip. “Yeah.”

Pippa jumped up and her grin widened. “You’re taking it. I knew you were. I knew you couldn’t give up an opportunity.” When she noticed that Sophie wasn’t excitedly jumping up and down with her, she pursed her lips together. “What’s the matter?”

Sophie didn’t know what it was Pippa was seeing on her face, but it must have been enough to give away everything Sophie had been keeping from her friend.

Pippa’s eyes widened and she gasped. “Duke.”

The single word carried all the weight of a falling redwood. Sophie grimaced and her friend’s brows creased.

“You two… when… how?” Pippa moved closer to Sophie and shut the door behind her. “How far has it gone?” When Sophie didn’t answer, Pippa sighed. “Oh, sweetie.”

Sophie looked away. “It’s still new. It’s not serious enough that it should even be an issue.”

Pippa’s look of disbelief made it clear she didn’t buy that for a second. “You can’t lie to me, Sophie. I know you don’t think we’re that close… and I know I’ve been a little absent lately… but seriously, even I can tell something is bothering you about this whole thing. Is it Duke? You did tell him, didn’t you? He didn’t seriously get mad at you for it, did he? I can’t picture him being like that?—”

“I haven’t told him yet.”

Pippa’s frown deepened. “But I thought…” Her eyes searched the floor as if she’d find the answers to her confusion there. “Have you decided what you’re going to do? You’re still taking the opportunity, right?” The concern in her voice made it clear she might be worried about Sophie giving it all up.

Sophie turned from Pippa and moved into her small kitchen. “Are you thirsty? I’m thirsty.”

Pippa followed her into the kitchen. “It’s been almost a week. You said you were going to make a decision by now. Did he say something? I swear, if he?—”

Sophie shook her head. “He didn’t say anything. Like I said, I didn’t tell him yet.”

“Why not? Based on that look on your face, I think you two have gotten close enough to warrant that sort of conversation.”

She turned to face Pippa, heart aching. “Because I’m scared .”

Understanding flooded Pippa’s face. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Sophie wheezed, “Oh.” She dragged a hand down her face and heaved another sigh but her lungs still ached as if she hadn’t been breathing since the moment Pippa had arrived. “Everything was going so well. We were so close. I could see…” Her eyes darted to Pippa. “I could actually see a future with him.” This time she covered her face with both of her hands. “It sounds so ridiculous now.”

Pippa’s soft touch on Sophie’s shoulder grounded her. “It’s anything but ridiculous,” she murmured. “Sometimes love comes quietly, growing slowly over time. Others…” she shrugged. “Sometimes it hits us in the chest like buckshot, knocking us over and setting our world on fire.”

Sophie fought the emotion she’d been holding back. All of this felt so strange to be talking about. She’d expected Pippa to laugh at her and tell her that she was being ridiculous. Pippa was a romantic in a lot of aspects. Sophie wouldn’t have been surprised if Pippa told her that she could have it all. She just needed to play her cards right.

Instead, Pippa was being so… understanding.

“What do you want to do?” Pippa asked quietly. “If everything worked out the way you wanted it to, what would happen?”

Sophie thought for a moment, her heart fluttering at the thought of trying to have it all. But that wasn’t possible. Duke had already said he didn’t like the idea of long distance. He also wasn’t a fan of her career. She shook her head. “Duke wouldn’t?—”

“I didn’t ask what Duke would do. I asked you what you would want. If you threw a coin in that wishing well, what would you say?”

She let out a sad laugh. “That wishing well is the most foolish thing in this town. I don’t know why you insist on throwing away your hard-earned money on?—”

“I’m not going to debate the good or the evil of the wishing well with you again. Please answer the question.”

Sophie started at her friend’s firm voice. Pippa wasn’t pulling any punches with her line of questioning. “If I could have it my way, I’d beg him to try to make us work.” The words were a whisper as if saying them out loud would take away any possibility of it coming true.

Pippa’s expression softened. “So ask him.”

Once again, Sophie shook her head. “You don’t know him like I do. He’s going through something right now. For me to ask him something like that… to put more on his plate—” She knew she couldn’t do that. Duke didn’t need that right now. He needed support.

“You never know unless you ask.” She said it softly, quiet enough that Sophie wasn’t sure she’d heard it. “I know about his family,” Pippa continued. “And I heard about Gus. If what you’re saying is true and you two are that close, then I think you need to tell him. And make sure you tell him how you feel. It takes two people to make a long distance relationship work and it takes two to let it fail. It’s not like you’re moving away. And it’s only a short trip in the grand scheme of time.”

“I don’t know that,” Sophie muttered.

Pippa’s eyes widened. “Really?”

The excitement in her voice was unmistakable.

“Sophie! That would be amazing.”

She knew that, which was why this issue was so problematic.

“Hey,” her friend murmured, drawing her attention. “Whatever you decide, you need to give him a chance to be part of the decision. You can’t throw up your walls and push him out. That’s not fair to him. It’s not fair to you.” Those words reverberated in Sophie’s head, bouncing around and making her feel even worse about holding back this information.

“I just wanted this Christmas to be fun. I wanted to spend it here with you and Rob with no complications.”

Pippa chuckled. “What fun would that have been?”

Sophie gave her a wan smile. “I guess you have a point. I wouldn’t trade what we have for anything. I don’t want to lose it, either.”

“Maybe you won’t.”

“Maybe.”

They chatted about other topics for another hour or so before Pippa had to get to the restaurant for work. By the end of her friend’s visit, Sophie had made her plan. She’d resolved herself to paying Duke a visit, to tell him what was going on and how she felt. Pippa had been right. Duke deserved to know what was going on no matter how new their relationship was.

She gathered up her jacket and keys, then she turned out the lights and headed for the door. When she pulled it open, she stifled a yelp when she came face to face with Duke.

His forearm was rested above his lowered head as he stood outside her apartment. There was no telling how long he’d been there. The agony she read in his body language was just as deep as it had been during their last interaction. When he lifted his eyes to her, Sophie’s breath hitched. “I’m so… sorry .”

Sophie didn’t know what to say. A myriad of questions flittered through her head as she waited for him to continue. What was he apologizing for? Was he here to break things off before she could ask him to give them a chance? Her heart hammered with anticipation.

“Can I come in?”

She nodded, gesturing into her apartment. “Sure.”

He moved past her and took a seat on her couch. Sophie moved through the apartment, turning the lights on again before she settled beside him on the couch and took his hand in hers.

“What’s going on?” she whispered. The weight on her chest was almost unbearable. Between her concerns about their relationship and the opportunity out of the country, her head already swam. Now there was something else to add to it.

Duke peered at her, guilt written in every line on his face. “I’ve been a jerk.”

“Duke—” Understanding washed over her, lessening her concerns slightly.

“I’m dealing with a lot of issues—they come to the surface every December, but that’s not an excuse. I should have never…” his voice trailed off.

“It’s okay?—”

“No, it’s not. I need you to know how much I appreciate you. You’re the one thing I could count on while I was dealing with my guilt over my family. You were there for me when Gus went missing. You’ve always been… so good to me, and I don’t want to risk losing you.”

His words echoed in her quiet apartment. Everything he said tugged at her in a heart. She wasn’t as good as he thought she was. Sophie had even winced at the implication he’d made that she was someone he could count on. That wasn’t how she’d felt even moments ago.

Sophie squeezed his hands as she let him talk, getting his frustrations off his chest. If this was how he felt, maybe they had a chance for something long term. Hope flared to life within her as that thought crossed her mind. But suddenly she realized he’d stopped talking and she shifted her focus to what he was looking at.

On her coffee table were several printed pages of restaurants she had confirmed for her tour in Europe. Beside them was the schedule—one she’d added hand-written notes to. He leaned forward and picked it up. His eyes flicked to meet hers, question and accusation easy to read in their depths. “What’s this?”