About Time (Broken Vows #4)

Chapter 34

Chapter Thirty-Four

Charlie Present- Age 53

Liam stares into the fire. That period of time was difficult for almost all of us, so it’s understandable that talking about it is like picking at a scab for some of us. I’m sure it’s harder to look back for him because his problems were brought on by himself.

I look over and see Wren sitting alone, with her arms holding her knees against her chest. There’s something so fragile about her like this. She’s proven herself to be a survivor time after time, but that doesn’t mean she’s always impenetrable.

Griffin comes up behind her and lifts her up in his arms. He sits down in the chair and keeps her cradled against his chest. He’s always so attuned to her, and knows exactly what she needs from him.

I won’t tell him this, because his ego doesn’t need any help, but he’s been an example for me in how to navigate my relationship with Hattie. For too long I let other people’s opinions have too much influence over whether or not I took a chance with her. Seeing my best friend not only settle down with a younger woman, but his son’s ex wife, made me wake up and realize I was miserable because I put too much weight on the wrong things.

Of course, I was also afraid we’d somehow turn into my parents, but at forty-two I finally realize that was a bullshit excuse. I wasn’t protecting Hattie, I was trying to protect myself. Considering I ended up causing both of us a massive amount of pain, I think it’s safe to say it didn’t work.

Hattie is still standing a bit away from me. I understand, because telling parts of this story felt like reliving it. Up to now we haven’t ever really discussed what it was like for each other during this time. I know I hurt her, but at the time we decided the best thing we could do was to start fresh and let the past go. The last few weeks I’ve felt unsettled, somewhat adrift, and I realize now that we’re approaching our tenth anniversary, well the one we recognize, I’ve been thinking a lot about time. The years we’ve had together have been so wonderful, but I can’t stop thinking about the twelve years we spent apart.

What is it about milestones that make you step back and take stock of your life to that point? At least now I have an explanation for the unsettled feelings that have been plaguing me for the last few weeks. Shining a light on our past seems to have cleared the dark feelings in my mind. It can’t erase my regrets, but I’m reminded that I have a lot more to feel grateful for.

Hattie looks over at me and smiles. I hold my hand out to her and like I expect she takes it without delay and lets me pull her onto my lap. She relaxes against me and tucks her head under my chin.

Scott is leaning forward in his seat waiting for us to continue. None of this brings up any negative memories for Scott and Harlow, but there seems to be something churning through the kid’s head. For some reason our story seems to be helping him put his thoughts into place.

“Was it hard going back home after being away for so long?” he asks Hattie.

She shifts so she’s facing him. “Yes and no. It was hard going from being all on my own to having people paying attention to everything I did. Only because I was on edge wondering how things were going to go with Charlie when I came back.”

“And how did that go away?” he asks.

“Charlie’s one and only concert at Liam’s party did the trick. It didn’t hurt that my niece was having a baby with her father-in-law while her ex-husband had a kid with her former best friend. That was a much juicier story for the gossip mill than me dating a man only ten years older than me. All that time we were stuck in our heads, and no one gave a shit about us.”

I kiss the side of her head. “We don’t look back at the dark days, Doll. We’re here now, and it’s exactly where we’re meant to be.”

I yawn dramatically. “Well, it’s getting late. Talking about the past reminds me that I’m old, so I should probably head to bed.”

Liam snorts. “Fuck you old man,” he says in a joking tone. “I’ve had to sit through the part where I was a raging dick. Let’s at least hear the part where I was getting my shit together.”

My lips twitch, but I don’t let them curve into a smile. Then he’d know I was just fucking with him.

“I guess we can tell the rest of it. What do you think, Doll?”

She rests back against me again. “We made it this far, we may as well get to the happily ever after part.”

“Are we? Happily ever after that is?” I ask.

Hattie shrugs. “I might as well keep you around. I already tried to divorce you once, it didn’t take,” she jokes.

Subtly, I rub the side of her leg and hip, letting her know she’ll be spanked later for that one. I don’t actually have a problem with what she said, but she only acts like a brat when she wants to be punished. I’m only too happy to oblige her with that.

Charlie Past - Age 42

Hattie and I don’t talk much over the two weeks she spends down in Florida putting in her notice and packing. I’m hardly surprised when I hear from her after she’s already hit the road. I’d hoped that we’d make that trip together, but she made sure we didn’t. The fact that she would rather drive for nearly three days and go through several states alone rather than be stuck in a car with me tells me that I have a lot of work to do to win her over.

I hang around Griffin's house a lot over the next few days. She did text me and let me know that she will be in town late on Thursday, but she didn't give me the address where she'll be staying. Hanging around Griffin and Wren allows me to try and make up for not exposing Liam's cheating and hopefully win Wren’s approval for dating her aunt.

That's how I find out that the plan is for her to stay with Griffin and Wren for a few days while she goes apartment hunting. So I pull a page out of Martin's playbook and convince Griffin that we need to have a barbecue.

“C’mon man she's been gone for a long time. Let's give her a good old-fashioned Harriston welcome. It doesn't have to be big, just the four of us would be perfect. Nobody should be gone for over a decade and then not have anyone make a fuss when they come home.”

Her car pulls in front of the house as the sun is setting behind the far-off hills. I’m trying not to be too obvious that I’m excited that she’s made it, but Griffin is noticing a lot more now than he did years ago.

“Dude, you’re acting like a Chihuahua that needs to piss. Do I need to let you outside?” he asks me.

“Ha ha, asshole,” I grumble.

Usually, he’s the one who is communicating through grunts and growls, but I think I get it now. He’s been bottling up his feelings for Wren for so long, hiding all of that makes you choose your words very carefully. I think that’s why he’s a lot more observant now. The restrictions on him have finally been cast off.

Luckily, I have no plan to hide my relationship with Hattie any longer. In fact, having everyone know is essential to my plan to win back more than her body.

“Seriously, what is up with you? It’s like you’re excited to see Wren’s aunt,” Griffin accuses.

I shrug. “Why wouldn’t I be? She’s hot. You have to admit that, she looks a lot like her niece, only at least she isn’t married to my kid.”

He rolls his eyes, taking my words for the playful ribbing we always do and not as a judgment of his choices. I already went down that road, and he did something I was never strong enough to do. Griffin followed his heart. He was a little slow at first, but the weeks he dragged his feet is nothing compared to the years I’ve lived without Hattie.

He doesn’t notice the wince I make when he mentions kids. I don’t think about it every day, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t occasionally wonder what our kid would have been like. He or she would be entering their teenage years now. Griffin and I could be sitting out here, him manning the grill while I hand him a cold beer from the cooler at our feet, and we could be groaning over the difficulties of raising a teenager.

Now, he’s got a second chance at having a family. He gets to experience fatherhood again, and I’m speeding through middle age with one failed marriage and no kids. I know people think I like being a bachelor. They bet on if I’ll ever settle down, but that’s just because they have no idea that I would love to, but there is only one woman who can fill that hole in my life.

Outside, we hear Hattie’s car turn off, followed by a car door opening and closing. I lose my cool at this point and practically sprint for the door.

“Don’t be weird. Wren would like her aunt to stick around this time,” Griffin warns. “If you hit it and quit it with Hattie, I’m going to let my pregnant woman use your balls for target practice.”

“Just marry her already. You know you want to, and honestly, you trying all these nicknames is making me want to barf. I swear to God, if you call her boo or bae or any of that other dumb ass shit I’ve heard Liam and his friends say, I will junk punch you,” I say to change the subject.

While Griffin stands around trying to figure out what to say back to me, I hurry out front. Hattie is exhausted from the trip. I can tell by the way she is moving slowly, getting her bags out of the back of the car.

“Here, let me get those for you,” I offer.

I’m glad that she doesn’t immediately turn down my offer to help. Instead, she steps aside. “What good is there to having a husband if he doesn’t carry heavy things for you.”

It’s surprising that she is making light of our marital status. I guess I expected her to ignore it completely. “So I’m your husband now?” I ask.

Hattie purses her lips. “Well, according to public records, you’ve been my husband for the last twelve years.”

Together, we walk toward the house. I want to be gentlemanly and open the door for her, but I grabbed a few more of her things, trying to impress her, and I don’t have a free hand.

Hattie grabs the door and holds it open for me. “After you,” she says and sweeps her hand out in front of her.

“You know it’s going to be a pain in the ass when I eventually move this stuff to my house,” I say. I know she’d say no if I asked, but I am playing a longer game now than I previously have. Eventually, I’ll wear her down, and she’ll be back in my home and in my bed, where she belongs. For now, I guess I can be helpful and show her the way to the guestroom.

I set her bags down, and she immediately starts to unpack. I grab her hand and pull her out of the room. “There’s plenty of time for you to settle in. Just come outside and socialize with us.”

“I’ll be out in a little bit. I’m going to freshen up first. I wasn’t really expecting a party the moment I got here.”

“It’s hardly a party, Doll. It’s just the four of us,” I point out.

She exhales. “What’s the point of this, Charlie?”

“I want them to get used to the idea of us,” I tell her.

“Like you actually want to tell anyone. Look, Charlie, you don’t have to pretend that someday this is going to be different. I’ve come to terms with it, so you really don’t need to try this hard. What we have is physical, and that’s okay.”

“It’s not okay. I want more,” I tell her.

Hattie goes back to unpacking her bag. “I don’t know if I have more to give you. I won’t let myself be hurt like that again.”