About Time (Broken Vows #4)

Chapter 36

Chapter Thirty-Six

Charlie Present- Age 53

Harlow groans, and starts rubbing her back. She’s about six months pregnant, but Scott is a big guy, and her bump looks like Hattie’s did much later in her pregnancy with our oldest, Morgan. Scott jumps up and hovers over her.

“Do you need to go lie down? Are you cold? What can I get for you,” he asks her frantically.

Griffin snickers.

“Please, like you weren’t a mother hen when Wren was pregnant,” I point out.

“You were worse. You bubble wrapped the edges of your furniture,” he shoots back.

I stare at him while I wait for the realization to sink in. His mouth falls open, and I can practically see a cartoon lightbulb turn on over his head. “But that was probably because?—”

I nod my head. “Because we lost our first baby? Yeah, I drove Hattie crazy for seven months.”

“I dreamed of duct taping you to a chair so I could have a moment of peace,” Hattie tells me.

“If you want to try out more bondage all you need to do is ask. I won’t be the one restrained though,” I tease her.

Just as I expect, Hattie’s face turns bright red. She clears her throat and turns her attention back to Harlow. “You guys don’t need to go back to the apartment. We have a guestroom. This story has waited this long. It won’t hurt to let it wait one more night.”

Scott grabbed one of the pillows off the patio furniture and stuck it behind Harlow’s back. “Are you okay, Low?”

Harlow nods, then turns her attention to me. “I want the rest of the story. Just because we all know the ending doesn’t mean we have a clue how you got here. Don’t leave me on a cliffhanger. I’m pregnant and very hormonal. I need to know how you got from Hattie ignoring you to—” she waves her hand back and forth between Hattie and me— “one of the most stable couples I’ve ever met.”

“Apparently, the secret is he’s kinky as fuck,” Griffin quips.

“Like you have room to talk, Daddy ,” I reply.

“I really wish I didn’t understand that reference,” Liam mutters.

“I blame your mother for making you so vanilla. You certainly didn’t get that shit from me,” Griffin tells him.

“As much fun as it is seeing who is the dirtier old man, I’d love to get my wife to bed, but she won’t go until you finish the story,” Scott grumbles.

“Okay baby Dom. Don’t think we don’t know about you. I’ll finish the story. You want to know how we got here? I’ve got twelve steps and the Goo Goo Dolls to thank for where we’re at today.”

Charlie Past- Age 42

Griffin runs around the party he’s hosting for Liam. Liam started renting Griffin’s old house after Griffin and Wren moved to Centralia. Liam wasn’t particularly thrilled with having a party, but Griffin pushed it because he thinks it’s important for Liam to recognize his achievements and not just focus on his mistakes. Six months being sober is a pretty amazing accomplishment after the way he was throwing away his life one drink at a time.

“Do you think there’s enough food?” Griffin asks me.

At first, I think he’s joking because it looks like there’s enough food to feed half the town. It’s odd because he didn’t invite that many people. “Yeah, there’s enough food,” I tell him when I realize he’s serious.

“I just want him to know I’m proud of him. Things have been so rocky between us, and I just need him to know that I’m still here for him,” he says.

I gesture around us. “I think a giant tent speaks volumes,” I say about the rental he got to make sure the weather wouldn’t ruin the party.

There are a lot of other things I could say. I’ve already made an ass out of myself trying to talk him out of pursuing Wren, but I can see now how wrong I was. They belong together.

“You have to stop blaming yourself for Liam being an alcoholic. You didn’t make him drink, and you didn’t make him abuse his wife. You could no more have stopped yourself from falling for her than I could?—”

Hattie walks into the tent, and like always, I’m speechless.

Griffin slaps his hand down on my shoulder and squeezes. “What is going on between the two of you?”

“Hopefully, everything,” I admit. “I’m crazy about her.”

He chuckles. “I was wondering when you were going to admit it. Did you think we didn’t notice you’ve been seeing each other for the last six or so months?”

“Six months is a decent amount of time to wait to propose, right?” I say without thinking.

He never reacts the way I expect. Rather than lecture me, he just shrugs. “It’s longer than I was with Wren before I knew she was the one.”

“A baby on the way didn’t hurt,” I tease him.

“When are you going to propose?” he asks.

“Do you think Liam will mind sharing the spotlight?” I ask.

“Fu…fudge, no,” I hear from behind me.

I turn around to see Liam holding his daughter, Natalie. That explains the really pathetic job of cursing. “Are you sure? I don’t want to be one of those assholes that turn someone else’s big moment on themselves.”

“Turn away. I don’t like the spotlight. I really don’t feel like celebrating that I’m not as big of a fuck-up anymore.”

Liam’s sponsor, Frank, comes over. “I think this is a good time.”

He groans. “I really don’t feel like giving a speech.”

“Don’t think of it like that. Everyone is here to support you. It would be good for you to acknowledge them and thank them for how much they’ve helped you get to this point,” Frank says.

I reach my arms out for Natalie. “Hey, pumpkin. Want to come with Uncle Charlie?”

Liam reluctantly goes to the head of the tent to address the dozen or so guests gathered around. My nerves swell up inside of me, pulsing like the beat of my heart in my ears. I know I should be listening to his words of contrition and gratitude, but all I can focus on is Hattie.

Over a year ago, she moved back to Harriston. On our first date, she asked me to prove to her how I feel. Like everything else, it took me far too long to figure out how to do it. Even now, the words I need don’t come to me. That’s not who I am. If she wanted me to build her something, I could do it without a problem.

I’ve always lived behind a wall. On the outside, people see a happy guy, simple probably, and the life of the party. When you are abandoned by your mother into the care of an alcoholic father, you learn how to deflect attention. Sometimes, the best way to hide something is in plain sight.

So when Hattie asked me to prove to her that I wanted her in my life, I bungled my first few attempts. I’m comfortable in the shadows. Before Hattie, I was happy to show people the image I wanted them to see. Griffin knows me the best, but even he buys the bullshit about me being a carefree manwhore. She’s the only one who has ever managed to get behind the wall. The only one I want to see me as I am.

It isn’t just the words she wants from me. She needs the grand gesture. God knows I’ve put her through enough shit that she deserves one. Putting on a display is so contrary to who I am that it’s been a hard thing to come to terms with. But, time after time, she’s gone out on a limb for me, she needs to see that I’m willing to do the same for her.

My problem has been trying to figure out what to say to her to prove to her how I feel. I hope what I’ve come up with will work. The words aren’t mine, but I mean every one of them. When Liam rejoins us, I know it’s time to be brave. I haven’t taken a lot of chances in my life, and all of the ones I have taken have been in pursuit of one woman.

For my plan to work, I need to get her on her own, but she’s talking to the new teacher I heard some people talking about earlier. I wasn’t seeking out the information, but Griffin sent me to the grocery store for ice. That’s all it took for me to learn that there’s a new, single, kindergarten teacher renting the guest house Wren used to rent after she left Liam.

That gives me an idea of how to get Hattie alone while not making her feel bad for abandoning the new girl. All I need is one baby to help me break the ice. Just so happens I know where to find one.

Dolores, an octogenarian most of the townsfolk view as their adopted grandmother, stops me before I take a step toward Hattie. “Did you ever try to pick up girls while holding a baby? Makes them weak in the knees. Might help you win over that pretty blonde you’ve been checking out.”

Very little shocks me, but Dolores does manage to surprise me every once in a while. “Mrs. Howell, I don’t think Liam would appreciate me using his daughter to charm women,” I say as she hands me Natalie, the daughter born as a result of the affair Liam had while married to Wren.

She bats away my concern. “Bah, he won’t complain much if he gets to meet the cute little tenant of mine, Claudia. Besides, you’re going to bring him his daughter and take Griffin and Wren’s little one. Griffin thinks he’s being subtle, but I think he’d like some time alone with his wife. Why don’t you trust an old woman and take Parker for a little while?”

I’ve lived in this town long enough to know not to argue with Dolores. I look down at Natalie. “You’re pretty cute kid, but I don’t actually need your help getting the girl.”

I look back over my shoulder and think about what Dolores said. Natalie could help me get Hattie by herself by occupying Claudia. “What do you think, want to help your dad find you a mommy?”

It’s pretty easy to bait Liam when I get over to where he’s having a very awkward conversation with Griffin and Wren. “This little one is a chick magnet. She’s even better than you were, Liam.”

“Stop using my daughter to pick up chicks,” he says, but it sounds more like he just thinks he has to protest.

I take Parker and drag Liam away. “C’mon, Liam. Let me introduce you to the new Kindergarten teacher. She loves babies—“ I hope— “and she’s got kind of a naughty librarian vibe.”Wren’s best friend, Bess, comes up to me when Liam and Claudia start to hit it off. She holds out her arms, and Parker practically jumps into her arms.

“I saw Griffin leading Wren out into the woods, so this is my chance to monopolize this little cutie for a while.”

With my excuse gone, I know it’s time for me to put it all on the line. There’s one last thing that even Hattie doesn’t know about me. I want to change that. I want her to know all of me. I want her to be the only one who does.

From under the table, I retrieve my guitar case. Playing has always been a private thing for me. I practice all the time, but it has always been my escape from what was going on at home. It’s what kept me going all the long nights I’ve spent alone since Hattie’s been gone. Now it’s the way I prove to her that she can have all of me out in the open.

I turn a chair around and take a seat. The first chords of “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls fill the tent.

I pause strumming the strings for a moment and address the crowd that’s gathering around me. “Harriet Parker, a while back, you asked me to prove to you that I wanted to be with you. I’m so sorry that you ever questioned how much I love you. I know that it’s my fault. I let my demons convince me that you were better off without me. Really, I was afraid of how much you made me feel. Not because I didn’t love every second of it but because I was afraid of losing it. Ironic, since my response was to push you away.”

My fingers slide up the neck, and I strum the strings again for a few more chords. “I know I’m older than you, but you’ve always been more wise than me. It took me far too long to catch up to you. I’m still not there, but I’m smart enough to know that my life will be infinitely better with you by my side than alone. For some reason, you still seem to want me in your life, and I’m done trying to convince you otherwise.”

“What are you doing?” she asks. I can see tears filling her green eyes, and one slips down her cheek.

“I’m proving it, Doll. I’m not a man with all the words to make you see how I feel, but I found someone else’s. This tells you how I feel better than I will ever be able to put into words.”

I try to tune out all of the people and focus only on Hattie. She’s the only one who’s ever mattered anyway. I start playing again and singing the words.

My mother once told me that I had a beautiful voice when I sang. I think that’s part of the reason I’ve never sung for anyone since. This is just another thing I’m taking back from the destruction of my youth.

When I play the last notes, I carefully set my guitar back in the case and pull out the other thing I’ve put in there. Hattie is still standing there, silently crying. I know her well enough to know that these aren’t tears of sadness. Now, she knows every part of me, and most importantly, she knows that she is everything to me.

Standing in front of her, I slowly lower to one knee. Her hand shakes as she lifts it to cover her mouth. One of the mistakes I made the first time was that I never gave her a ring. Years ago, after Elisa and Martin passed, I got her a ring. I’m not even sure why I did it. I knew she was going to leave, and I also knew I wasn’t going to stop her. I guess buying it was my way of holding on to the hope that someday I would be able to get out of my own way.

Today is that day. These are words I have practiced. I won’t ask her to marry me because we’re already married. Even our failure to get divorced is a sign that we are meant to be together. Instead, I hold up the ring, an emerald set inside a platinum band. I wanted something to match her eyes and to be as special as she is.

“Hattie, I have loved you for what feels like a lifetime, and I know I will love you for the rest of this one. Be my wife.”

Everyone who is listening will hear me propose, but Hattie and I know I’m asking her to come back to me and be my wife again.

She drops her left hand from her mouth and holds it out to me. I slip the ring on and pull her into my arms. For the first time in all the years since we first got together, I kiss her in front of others.

“Come home with me,” I whisper in her ear.

Hattie takes my hand. “Forever.”

That is the moment where our story would end if this were a novel, but that’s too bad because it would skip the best part. It would miss all of the mornings I get to wake up with her in my arms. One day, hopefully not too far away, those lazy mornings will be interrupted by kids climbing into bed with us. In short, the best part is the life I get to build with her. I can’t wait for every moment.