Come As You Are (Twisted Bard)

10. Vee

Vee

Sebastian continued to hold me as he dozed off. I, on the other hand, remained awake, mortified that I’d climaxed almost as soon as he touched me like some horny teenager and then confessed that I was practically a virgin. Trying to reassure myself that he hadn’t kicked me out of his bed did little to dispel my worry that my lack of experience had turned him off and I’d never get another chance to be with him. The thoughts spun through my head without relief even as I tried to remind myself of the promise Sebastian had made before he fell asleep.

I definitely wanted him and had since the moment I’d walked into Illyria, but another thing occurred to me as I lay in Sebastian’s bed. I remembered being held between both him and Olivia after I’d confessed to working for Orsino and fallen apart. Their combined presence had calmed me, grounded me, made me feel safe and protected, cherished even, and I missed Olivia. Even as I began to relax in Sebastian’s embrace, I felt as if something—or someone—was absent. I might not have been a genius, but it was obvious why I felt that way.

It hadn’t escaped my notice in the weeks I’d been at Illyria that Sebastian was hopelessly in love with Olivia. He tried to hide it, but I saw a lot from my dance platform, and I couldn’t count the number of times I’d seen him gazing up at the window of her office while he mixed drinks, his expression full of longing. Whenever she came into the club, his attention was riveted to her, and when we had entered her office this morning, his nervous energy wasn’t solely caused by how she would react and concern for my future.

And then there was the moment on Olivia’s couch when the two of them were holding me. I felt it when they touched. It might have been accidental—a brush of hands because of our proximity—but it was electric all the same, a jolt that arced between the three of us. It hadn’t only been about Sebastian and Olivia, but all three of us. More than anything, more than Olivia’s words or Sebastian’s solidness, that was what had calmed me and the moment in which I knew everything would be all right.

With that thought lingering in my mind, I finally dozed off.

We were woken the next morning by someone pounding on the front door. Sebastian grumbled, but got out of bed and grabbed a pair of sweats from the floor.

“Don’t go anywhere,” he said as he put them on and left the room, yelling for whoever was continuing to knock that he was coming.

As soon as he opened the door, I heard Maria’s voice along with someone else’s I didn’t recognize. At first, I wondered what they were doing at Sebastian’s so early, but then I realized it was full daylight outside, so it had to have been at least ten. I couldn’t confirm that because my phone was still charging in my room, and I had no idea where Sebastian’s was. As my sleep-dulled brain slowly came online, I realized the bigger issues for me were clothing and getting out of Sebastian’s room without being seen.

My clothes from the previous day were on the floor, and I was able to snag my jeans without getting out of the bed. I dragged them under the covers and was all set to shimmy into them when I heard Maria announce she needed to use the bathroom. Before I could think what to do, she was passing by the open doorway to Sebastian’s room. I froze and thought she hadn’t seen me, but then she backed up and cocked her head to the side as she took me in.

“Fast work,” she said, her tone of voice somewhat icy, and then she called out for Sebastian.

He appeared in the doorway as well, still shirtless, the gray sweats slung low enough on his hips, I could see the twin V-grooves on his lower abdomen. In spite of myself, I blushed.

“Do I need to give you another lecture on interoffice hookups, Bastian?” Maria asked.

“No,” Sebastian said. He took hold of Maria’s arm. “The bathroom is this way.”

I didn’t hear everything they said to each other as Sebastian escorted her down the short hall, but I caught enough to know Maria was telling him not to hurt me, and he was telling her he didn’t plan to. Her incredulity did nothing to help calm my nerves, and I scrambled to get dressed before Sebastian came back.

“Vee.”

My back was to the door as I searched for my shirt. Sebastian’s room wasn’t the neatest, and he seemed to keep his clothing in overflowing laundry baskets rather than putting anything away. I straightened and stood, a handful of shirts in my hands—none of them mine—as Sebastian crossed the threshold, then took them from me. He pulled out a red T-shirt and handed it to me. I pulled it over my head as quickly as I could.

“Vee,” he said again. “You know I don’t have a stellar reputation, but I meant what I said to you. You make me want to try to do better.”

I nodded, intending to tell him that I believed him, but what came out of my mouth was something entirely different. “What about Olivia?” I asked.

Sebastian stilled. He’d been about to reach for me, and his hand paused in midair. “I don’t think we need to say anything yet.”

“That’s not what I meant.” I turned to face him and squared my shoulders. We were almost the same height, and I only had to lift my chin a bit to meet his gaze. “You love her.” It wasn’t a question because I didn’t want him to think there was room to equivocate. “I see you watch her, know you look up at her window hoping to catch a glimpse of her. I see the look on your face whenever she walks into the room.”

Sighing, Sebastian let his hand continue its trajectory until it touched my face. He cupped my chin. “It’s been three years,” he said. “If there was any hope of a future with Olivia, it would have happened by now.”

I nodded. “Just don’t lie to me,” I said. “If all you want is what happened last night, tell me straight up. I’m not fragile. I won’t break. I only want to know where I stand.”

My declaration made Sebastian smile. “I promise, but I expect the same from you.” He leaned forward and kissed the tip of my nose, then lifted my chin a bit more so he could kiss me.

“All right, lover boy,” Maria said from the doorway. “Let’s see if we can make you look like a credible drag queen.”

I felt Sebastian shift and was pretty sure he was giving Maria the finger behind his back, but he never took his eyes off me. “We okay?” he whispered, and I nodded. He gave me another quick kiss, then turned to face Maria. “Do your worst,” he said.

Two hours later, Sebastian’s living room looked as if the dressing room at Illyria had exploded all over it. There were gowns and heels, makeup and wigs, and weird pieces of undergarments—of whose purpose I had no clue and wasn’t sure I wanted one—tossed over every available surface.

Maria had brought one of the other drag queens with her, and she and Lexi had whipped Sebastian in and out of outfits so quickly, my head was spinning. Ultimately, though, they found something that worked for him: a slim, red sequenced sheath dress that hugged his flat abs and muscular thighs. It set off his dark hair and coloring beautifully, but that was just the beginning because Lexi sat Sebastian down on the couch and started doing his makeup.

Although I’d seen the queens at Illyria in various stages of dress, I’d never seen the entire process from start to finish, and it stunned me how much went into creating a look. I was thankful all I had to do was oil myself up and slide on a pair of cutoff denim shorts and my boots. Sometimes, I added some glitter, but most of the time I didn’t bother. It didn’t seem to make any difference one way or the other to the guys who stuffed money in my shorts.

“If we had time, we’d wax your chest,” Lexi said as she added contour lines to Sebastian’s cheeks.

“Thank fuck you don’t,” Sebastian growled.

I silently agreed because his chest was just the right amount of furry, and I hadn’t had nearly enough time to run my fingers through it.

Maria and Lexi moved on from makeup to wigs. Some were outrageous towers that would have looked at home in the court of Louis XVI, and some looked like the ones they sold at my mom’s salon in Twin Falls. They finally settled on a relatively tame one that matched Sebastian’s natural hair color and made him look quite glamorous. I was kind of taken with Bast’s queen persona.

By that time, I had to head out for my shift at Illyria. I contemplated calling in sick, but Sebastian nixed that idea.

“With both Maria and me off tonight, someone’s got to keep an eye on things,” he told me as I stuffed my “work clothes” into my backpack. “Just be careful.” He crowded into my tiny bedroom, teetering on the heels Lexi had given him.

I put my hands on his arms to steady him. “I’m not going to do anything stupid,” I said.

“No, but the customers can get handsy sometimes.”

“That never bothered you before.” I smirked at him.

“That’s because you weren’t mine to worry over before.”

The possessive growl in his voice sent a shiver through me, but I resisted asking the obvious question of whether I was really his. No matter how much I wanted to believe that was true, it was something that only time would prove. My history whispered that all love was temporary and conditional, but I pushed it aside.

I kissed Sebastian, trying my best not to smear his lip gloss. The sensation was interesting, at once slick and sticky, but the taste was an awful mix of Vaseline and artificial cherry. Sebastian laughed at the face I made as I searched for a tissue and wiped the disgusting mess off my lips.

The sound of his laughter and his suddenly protective warning for me to stay safe wrapped around me as I left the apartment and headed to the club. It felt nice to have someone who cared about me again. Even if it was only a passing thing, there was still a person who knew where I was and would be waiting for me when I returned. I hadn’t been aware it was something I missed until I had it again, but it made me smile all the way to work and kept me smiling as I got up on my dance platform for my first shift.

The club wasn’t terribly full when my first shift on my dance platform began, but little by little it started to fill as the night wore on. I’d gotten some regulars who came to watch me and shook my ass at them then squatted down, my legs splayed open so they could see my package through the tight denim. The other boys had taught me to use a cock ring and tease myself before I went out on the floor so I looked bigger and harder for the customers. In appreciation, my regulars stuffed money in my waistband and the pockets of my shorts. A couple stroked their hands up my thighs and snuck bills under the dangling threads of the cutoffs legs. Sometimes I even got a slip of paper with a phone number or crude suggestion of what they’d like to do to me.

At first, it was strange, but I’d gotten used to it—enjoyed it, even—but tonight my eyes kept turning to the bar. Toby and one of the other bartenders were busy keeping the patrons in drinks, but without Sebastian to keep my gaze anchored, I found myself taking in more of the club than I usually did. I also felt more exposed on the platform than usual even though I knew Festus and our other bouncer would be on anyone in a flash who touched me. Andrew had told me that right from the start. Still, I felt unmoored and my attention wandered.

Olivia’s office was dark like it usually was. The smoked glass meant you couldn’t see in, but when the lights were on inside, you could sometimes see shadows as she moved around or watched the crowd. Tonight, though, she wasn’t here as far as I could tell. Mal was, though, and at first I couldn’t put my finger on what was different about him, but then I realized he’d gotten a haircut. Mal’s usual style was pretty much undetectable with his hair hanging down in a way I supposed he thought…attractive, but it really just looked like he couldn’t be bothered to do anything other than run his fingers through it. This, though. The sides were shaved, but the top had been left longer and flipped into a kind of pompadour. It was glossy with product. He was also wearing black trousers instead of jeans, and a blue, linen button-up. I had to admit, he looked pretty good, and from the appreciative looks from some of the patrons, they did, too.

When my first break came, I headed to the bar to grab a bottle of water, and Toby nodded toward Mal who was skulking around the edges of the dance floor. “Looks like he found ‘Olivia’s’ memo,” he observed.

“Looks like it.”

He grinned at me. “I sent Maria a pic to show her how it’s going.”

“I’m sure she’s thrilled.”

Toby didn’t have a chance to answer me because one of my regulars sidled over and slid his arm onto the bar top in front of me, then angled their body in a way that cut off my view of Toby.

“You didn’t call me,” the guy pouted. “I think that means you owe me a drink.”

I shifted away from him and glanced at Toby, who raised an eyebrow at me. Did I want him to rescue me? Not really. I wanted to handle this on my own. Was that stupid of me? Probably.

“I’ve got a boyfriend,” I told the guy. “A really jealous and possessive boyfriend.”

To my surprise, the guy shrugged. “So do I. That’s what would make this so much more fun.”

He put his hand on top of mine and squeezed it while I suppressed a shudder at his touch.

“I’m not interested,” I said and turned to go. My break was almost over, and I wanted to grab a snack from the staff room before I got back on my platform, but the guy hadn’t let go of my hand.

“Will you dance with me later?”

I shook my head. “Sorry. Not allowed.”

“Hey, dude,” Toby said. “How about letting the kid go, okay? He’s got a job to do.”

I slid out of the guy’s grasp as he turned, mouthed a “thank you” at Toby, and made a beeline for the staff room. Jeffers, one of Illyria’s other dancers, was already there guzzling a bottle of water before his shift, but he stopped as I slumped onto the ratty sofa that took up space beneath all the posters the state required employers to post.

“Rough night already?” he asked.

“Just an overly friendly regular.” I shrugged. “Nothing I can’t handle.” We all had them. It was one of the reasons why I envied Sebastian and the other bartenders. They could flirt all they wanted in order to get better tips, but the bar protected them from guys like the one who had followed me from my platform.

“Make sure you get Festus or Davis to walk you to your car.”

I snorted. “Like I have a car. Dude, I walk to work.”

“Maybe tonight you should splurge on a Lyft.” He contemplated me for a moment, then quirked a sly smile at me. “Rumor has it you’re living with Sebastian now. Nicely done.” Before I could sputter out a response, Jeffers shrugged. “He’ll give you a good time once, but he’s a bit…self-centered and full of himself. Not really boyfriend material, if you know what I mean.”

Again, my response was cut off, but this time by Mal stalking into the staff room. Jeffers let out a wolf whistle. “Hot date tonight?” Jeffers asked.

Mal gave him a withering look, then glanced up at the clock. “You’re late.”

“Pleasant as always.” Jeffers drained the last of the water and tossed the bottle into the recycling bin. “Be kind to Vee here, he’s got a regular giving him a hard time tonight,” he said, and then shimmied past Mal who still stood in the doorway.

“Are you all right?” Mal asked. “Is this something that needs to be reported?”

I shook my head, stunned by his concern. We had a no-fly list for customers who were no longer welcome at Illyria, but I didn’t think the guy’s behavior rose to that level. At least not yet. “I’m good,” I said.

Apparently satisfied with my response, Mal nodded at me, and then withdrew from the staff room leaving me alone with my thoughts. I have to admit, they were fairly jumbled at the moment. So much had happened in just the past twenty-four hours, and now Mal was acting almost human.

I crossed to my locker and retrieved my phone, intending to send Sebastian a text about the recent developments at Illyria. Jeffers’ comments niggled at the back of my brain, but the photos that lit up my screen made me forget all about them. Maria and Lexi had worked a miracle on Bast. In that red dress, with his hair and makeup done to perfection, and posed with one hip canted while one gloved hand rested over his head against the doorjamb, he almost looked like Jessica Rabbit. There were other photos, other poses, but the one in the doorway was the one I liked the best.

you look gorgeous , I typed. back to work now

Powering my phone off, I returned it to my locker, then grabbed a quick snack before heading out onto the floor. Fortunately, the guy from earlier had disappeared. Whether he’d been told to give it a rest for the night or lost interest all on his own, I didn’t know, but I was grateful he was gone. Still, I took Jeffers’ advice and called for a Lyft to take me home when I was done. It almost killed me to do it since it took a huge chunk out of my tips for the night, but it was better to be safe than sorry.

When I got home, I opened the front door as quietly as I could in case Sebastian was already asleep and found him dozing on the couch, some sci-fi movie on the television. His eyes opened as soon as I closed the door, and a big smile broke across his face as he reached out a hand for me and drew me to him until I was standing between his spread legs. Not content with that, I climbed onto his lap and straddled him.

“Did you miss me?” I asked.

“Toby texted me about the asshole at the bar,” Sebastian growled, and I have to admit, being the object of his possessive side caused a jolt of arousal to run through me.

I rocked my hips slightly, amused at myself since I was usually wiped out when I got home from Illyria. Maybe this was what happened when I had a few good nights of sleep behind me. Or what happened when I had a sexy man beneath me.

“It was fine.” I wrapped my hands around Sebastian’s neck. “I told the guy I had this very jealous, very possessive boyfriend at home.”

“You do, huh?” Sebastian’s hands rose to my hips. “And that’s what got him to back off?”

“Yeah. But, Toby and Mal took care of me, too.”

“Mal?” Sebastian’s eyes went wide.

“Yeah, I know. Maria’s plan may be working better than we expected.” I nuzzled into his neck. “I loved the pics of you in drag. You were very sexy.”

“I felt ridiculous,” Sebastian said, but there was no heat in his words. His hands were in my hair, thumbs stroking gently against my scalp, and it felt amazing. I arched my back like a cat and pressed deeper into his grasp.

“Well, you looked amazing. It wouldn’t surprise me if you made it into the pageant and took the top prize.”

Sebastian chuckled, his hips bucking up so his erection rubbed against mine. I groaned at the feel of him, then whined as he sat up, but I didn't have long to miss our contact. Cupping my head in his strong hands, he rocked me backwards until I was all but lying on his thighs. Dancing had made me more limber, so my muscles only protested a bit, but their dismay was drowned out by pleasure as Sebastian leaned over me and began to feast on my neck, nipping and sucking on the tender skin of my throat and teasing at the line of tendons that stood out on my neck as I tried to get his mouth on me everywhere at once.

My cock protested its confinement, so I reached for the button on my jeans. If Sebastian was going to keep me in a position that made it impossible for me to touch him, I'd touch myself instead. Sebastian had other ideas, though, and lifted his head long enough to tell me to stop.

“That’s mine,” he said.

I met his eye. “Then do something about it,” I said, then suppressed a shiver as Sebastian’s gaze went feral. It thrilled me that I could affect him so strongly, that he wanted me so much. I’d never experienced anything like this in my life, and it was amazing.

Without breaking eye contact, Sebastian shifted me enough to undo my jeans and slip his hand inside. I sighed as his fingers closed around the head of my cock, and he began to play with me. When my eyes started to close, Sebastian told me to open them again. The commanding tone in his voice made it impossible for me not to obey him.

“Look at me, Vee,” he said. “Be here with me.”

I nodded, my eyes focused on his, gasping as his grip became tighter, his tugs on my cock harder. Of their own accord, my hips thrust forward, wanting to feel his hand enclose all of me in that rough circle of callouses, muscles, and bone. It felt so good, but I was determined not to tip over the edge as quickly as I had the previous night. I might not have a lot of experience being with another guy—especially one as hot as Sebastian—but I knew how to control myself, to edge myself until I absolutely couldn’t stand it and my orgasm practically ripped itself through my body.

At the thought of what Sebastian and I could experience, I felt that telltale tension begin to gather at the base of my balls.

“What are you thinking?” Sebastian asked with an evil grin.

“About you. Wanting to touch you, taste you.” With each phrase, I rocked myself into the confines of his fist, quickly finding a rhythm.

“And?”

“And how good it will feel if I wait.”

Sebastian gave a firm stroke down my length, and then back up to tease at my slit. The precum he gathered on his fingers eased his way downward until his fingers tightened around my base, and he squeezed just hard enough to make me gasp.

“ If you can wait,” he growled. “I could put a cock ring on you and tease you for hours.”

My hips punched forward of their own accord as a cry left my mouth. “That…that sounds…amazing,” I managed to say.

“Mm hm.” Sebastian leaned forward and captured my mouth in a blistering kiss, his tongue pressing against the seam until I had no choice but to allow him inside. He took full possession, exploring and teasing, teeth grazing against my lips, his stubble abrading my cheeks and chin. All the while, his hand stayed firm on my cock, stroking in time with his tongue’s thrusts into my mouth, gripping me tighter whenever he felt my balls begin to draw up.

I was dizzy with endorphins and the rush of being so powerfully desired. My body, already worked to exhaustion by my shift, became supple in Sebastian’s hold, my muscles lax, my mind devoid of all thought. Only feeling remained. Sensation and surrender. My body became both completely relaxed and unbelievably aroused, while my mind focused on the places where Sebastian burned my skin with his touch. I was lust drunk and couldn’t get enough of the way he alternated firm strokes with light, almost teasing caresses. The sounds Sebastian drew from me should have been embarrassing, should have had my face flaming red, but all that was going up in flames was every single nerve in my body.

With a frustrated growl, Sebastian shifted me again, but this time he rocked me forward into his arms and stood. Instinctually, I wrapped my legs around his hips and locked my ankles, while my head descended to his shoulder. I wasn’t much smaller than him, but he carried me easily the short distance from the living room to his bed. Along the way, I ran my fingers through his hair and teased at his ears with my tongue, captivated by a part of his body I hadn’t explored yet.

Sebastian dumped me onto the mattress, and I immediately scrambled to my knees as he went for the tie on his sweats, but I got there first. I stared at him and didn’t look away as I slowly pulled the drawstring loose.

“Mine,” I said, my voice husky and breathless as Sebastian’s nostrils flared and his eyes turned molten. “I want you in my mouth.”

“Do it,” Sebastian said.

I made short work of releasing his sweats, letting them pool at his feet while I scooted to the end of the bed and got myself into position. Sebastian was thicker than anyone I’d ever blown before, and even his velvety head stretched my lips as I took him inside my mouth.

“That’s it,” Sebastian murmured. “Go easy. Breathe through your nose.”

With my mouth full, I nodded, and did as he told me, relishing the moment I got him to the back of my throat and heard him sigh.

“So good, Vee.”

He thrust lightly, steadying himself with his hands on my shoulders as he rocked back and forth, and I appreciated that he didn’t grab my head and ram himself inside. I wanted this to be good for him, wanted to show him I could take him as easily as anyone else despite my lack of experience. Hollowing my cheeks, I sucked hard on him and began to use the movement of my tongue to massage his length. When Sebastian groaned, I knew I’d done well, and when he suddenly moved his hands to my hair and tightened his grip, I stilled, letting him fuck my mouth with shallow thrusts.

Each time he pulled back then slid forward ramped up my arousal, the fire of it traveling through my body to my own cock. I was hard, my hips rocking forward, seeking friction for my dick, but finding only the lightest of touches from the fabric of my briefs because my jeans were unzipped and loose around my waist. It made me ache as my balls drew up tighter against my body, and I was almost frantic with need by the time Sebastian pulled all the way out of my mouth.

“Lie down,” he growled, and I scrambled to comply.

When I made to strip my jeans off, Sebastian leaned forward and grabbed my hands. He straddled my legs and knee-walked his way over me until his groin was directly above mine, his balls hanging low enough to touch the tip of my cock. When he leaned down to kiss me, I tried to grind against him, then whined as he pulled his hips back far enough all I got was a ghost of a touch.

“Patience.” He smiled against my lips. “You had your fun, now let me take care of you.”

The gentleness of his voice confused me, and I frowned. “I wanted to make you feel good.”

“You will.” Sebastian’s chuckle was low and filthy, and it made a shiver run down my spine. “Do you trust me, Vee?”

All teasing had gone from his voice, and I lifted my chin to stare into hazel eyes that were watching me intently. The air seemed to still around us as Sebastian waited for my answer. I wasn’t stupid, and knew this might not be anything more than physical attraction, a need to get off and get on with life, but it felt like more. With the way Sebastian touched me, the way he looked at me, and the way my body responded to him…no one else had come close to making me feel like this. So, I decided that was good enough for me and nodded.

“I trust you.”

“Good.”

This time, when Sebastian leaned down to kiss me, he let our bodies connect. I wrapped my legs around him as his mouth plundered mine, and we ground against each other, gasping and moaning into each other’s mouths.

About the time I felt like I couldn’t stand anymore, Sebastian worked his hand between us and tugged my jeans and briefs over my hips. I nearly wept with relief as I felt cool air on my cock, and pushed all the clothing down my legs, twisting to rid myself of them completely and not caring where they landed because as soon as I was free, Sebastian grasped both our dicks in his hand and began to stroke.

“Oh, fuck,” I said and let my head fall back onto the pillows.

Sebastian leaned closer and whispered in my ear, “Next time.” Then he began to work us over in earnest.

As strung out as I already was, it didn’t take long for my orgasm to build. I struggled between wanting to fall over the edge and holding off as long as I could, but it was no use. My climax barreled up my spine, and I closed my eyes as the world turned white, the sound of my cries echoing in the small room.

My peak waned, but Sebastian was still holding the both of us as he used my cum to smooth his way. He grunted, took in a deep breath, then let out a deep-throated groan as he spilled between us, searing my skin with his heat, and then collapsing on top of me while he caught his breath.

I lay beneath him, my hands trailing over the smooth planes of his back, tracing circles and squiggles as our bodies cooled. In the back of my mind, I heard Jeffers’ warning about Sebastian, but pushed it away. I was too happy and content to worry about what this all meant.