Cursed by Darkness (Once Upon A Curse)

20. Juniper

TWENTY

Juniper

Theran made a plan in secret. He continued sending forces toward the capital of Mesairla, wanting to destroy everything Eryx had built. And then, he went for the ultimate blow. He went after Ronna.

W ith each word out of her husband’s mouth, Juniper grew more and more nauseated.

“You’re going to the valley? To the front lines? I-I don’t…” She pushed to her feet, no longer hungry. “No.”

“I have to.” Bodin stood too. “Even with your father’s help, we’ve lost too many men that. The commanders are meeting to strategize. I need to go help however I can.”

She shook her head furiously. “No. You’re the king; y-you can’t go into danger like that. Especially not without an…” Her words trailed off, and she glanced at the bed. Where he promised they would continue after she ate.

Tears rimmed her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she walked toward the bed.

“June?”

“We need to do this.” She traced a finger over the pale green blankets. Reminding herself that this was what she wanted anyway, she faced him.

He tilted his head to the side, his eyes full of sorrow. This was their duty— her duty—she knew that. She’d hoped for more, especially with their growing friendship, but now… now it felt like they were only doing this in hopes of creating an heir.

Ignoring the pit in her stomach, she nodded to herself and turned back around. “Will you undo my laces?”

“Juniper—”

“Please don’t,” she said, closing her eyes. “I know what this is and what is expected of me. I always knew this would need to happen, and you’ve been gracious giving me time, but we’re out of that now.”

She hadn’t heard his footsteps, but she suddenly felt his presence behind her. His breath stirred her hair. Yet, he didn’t start to remove her dress.

“Do you trust me?” His hands went to her hips.

“Yes,” she breathed.

His grip tightened on her waist. “Then, trust me when I promise you that I’ll make it home. When I swear that making an heir isn’t the only reason I want you on that bed gasping my name.”

Her jaw dropped in surprise at the crass words. Even so, they set a fire low in her belly. She didn’t fight it when he pulled her around to face him once more. Finally opening her eyes, she met his gaze. He brushed her cheeks with a thumb. She hadn’t realized she was crying.

“You can’t promise you’ll make it back,” she said. “It’s too dangerous.”

“I have shadow magic. I can do more than create magical worlds.”

She hadn’t thought about that. “What can you do?”

“Protect myself.” He lifted a hand, and black smoke swirled across his skin, circling his fingers and wrist.

Bodin sounded so certain, so confident, that she wanted to believe him. It didn’t ease the terror churning her stomach though. “I don’t want to lose you, not when we just started to…”

“You won’t lose me with this trip.” He leaned in to kiss her cheek. “I’ll return to you.”

Juniper sighed and wrapped him in a hug. “And tonight isn’t about making an heir?”

“I would very much like for that to happen, but it might not tonight. That’s not what this is about anyway,” he said, his hand rubbing soothing circles against her back. “Besides, if you recall, I was ready to go in the cave earlier, and that was long before I received word of the meeting.”

She did remember. She remembered feeling his hardness through their clothes and the way she’d wanted more. It amazed her, this heat that flooded her. Never did she think she would feel this way about the once-stranger she’d married. “You’re right about it probably not happening tonight. The books I read did say that it often takes more than one try.”

He smirked. “Oh, Sunshine, we’re definitely doing it more than once before I leave.”

“But you said you were leaving in the morning.”

Lifting a hand to the back of her neck, he whispered, “Yes, I did.”

And then, his mouth was on hers, claiming her, tasting her. His tongue swept into her mouth, and she reveled in the connection. As he deepened the kiss, his free hand began tugging at the laces of her dress, and she pulled on his shirt. She wanted to see him. All of him.

Bodin paused and ran to lock the door. She couldn’t help but chuckle. He clearly wasn’t taking any chance this time. On his way back to her, he ripped his shirt off over his head and tossed it to the floor before spinning her around to work faster on the laces. It felt like a lifetime passed by the time he finished and slowly lowered her sleeves, her bodice, and then the skirt. With the lavender fabric pooled at her feet, she faced him on trembling legs in only her shift and pantalettes, both of which were short enough to show a lot of bare skin. In the anticipation of waiting, her worries returned.

“You are breathtaking, Juniper,” he said.

Feeling emboldened, she placed her hands on his chest. She lowered them, feeling the hard muscles along his abdomen. He grabbed both of her wrists before she could reach his pants and lifted them to cross behind his neck. The move made her step forward until she was pressed fully against him. Her heart raced in her chest as he slid his hands down her arms, her sides, her waist. When he didn’t stop there, she bit at her lip.

“That kills me, you know.” Bodin kissed her, sucking her lip into his mouth. He cupped her backside for a second on his way lower. She realized he was bending his legs when he was suddenly at eye level. There wasn’t time to ask questions though. He gripped the backs of her thighs and hauled her into the air as he straightened.

A squeal escaped her, and she tightened her arms behind his head. He guided her legs around him and kissed her again and again. And she realized this might be her new favorite place in the world—in his arms, pressed against his bare torso. She practically melted in his embrace.

He turned and managed to put one knee on the bed while still holding her. Laying her down, he followed, never leaving her touch. His hands explored as they continued kissing, and when she once again felt that hardness, she knew it was time.

“Bo,” she whispered as his lips trailed along her neck. “More.”

He immediately obeyed and slipped his hand beneath her shift. There was no hesitation this time as he pulled her pantalettes down. They hadn’t even hit the floor before his fingers found her center. She felt like she should have been embarrassed, especially when he found wetness waiting for him, but she didn’t. This need for him was too strong and unlike anything she’d ever experienced—anything she’d read about too, for that matter.

When Bodin began guiding her shift up, she took a deep breath and lifted enough for him to remove it. As he took in her naked form, her cheeks flushed. He didn’t say anything, just stared at her, his eyes wide, so she reached for his pants. That seemed to snap him out of his trance. He stood to take them and his boots off.

He gripped himself and pumped his length while returning to the bed.

“Fuck,” she whispered, eying the size. She swallowed past the tightening in her throat.

She’d felt it through his pants when kissing, and she had gripped him that morning when she got him off. But to see it like this without any more barriers between them… She didn’t have anything to compare it to other than sketches in anatomy books, but Bodin seemed much larger than those.

Kneeling in front of her, he reached for her hand and guided it to him as he said in an amused tone, “You look terrified.”

She took over his movements, trying to hide her shock of how it felt against her palm, smooth and hard at the same time. “How is this supposed to fit inside me?”

“It’ll fit,” he said with all the confidence in the world.

“Without ripping me in half?” As she continued with his hand around hers to show her what he liked, he used his other fingers to play with her again. It was so difficult to concentrate on what she was doing when he kept pressing circles around the sensitive area at the top of her sex. It nearly took her breath away.

Bodin pulled her hand off of him and shifted on the bed to lean over her, pressing her fully into the pillows. He lifted both of her wrists above her head and kissed her like their lives depended on it. Which, when she thought about it and the fact that he was leaving in the morning, it very well might… but she refused to focus on that right now and made sure she stayed in the moment, focused. When he started grinding against her, she put her legs around him once more.

Breaking the kiss, he whispered, “Do you trust me?”

He’d asked her this earlier, and she had then too, but now… After their argument and getting everything out in the open, she found her answer to be even truer than before.

“I do.” She smiled, realizing those were the same words uttered at their wedding. At the time, she had meant it in a detached sort of way. She had agreed to marry him and was promising herself to him, but now… she was silently vowing so much more. Her heart, her mind, her body. Her life.

He rubbed the tip of his hard cock back and forth through her slickness, all while holding her gaze. “I do too.”

Juniper wondered if he was thinking the same thing as her. If they were both using the sentiment as a replacement for another set of three words she was too scared to voice.

Bodin brought his fingers to her lips and whispered, “Open.”

She did, and then she closed her mouth around the digits when he told her to get them wet, swirling her tongue across his skin. He pulled them out and lowered them to where he’d touched her before. Rubbing his fingers along her slit, he added to her slickness and slowly pushed one finger in.

“Bodin,” she said with a sigh.

He grinned as he eased in and out of her. Her breaths quickened, her body tensing. That tight coil within was seconds from springing free when he stopped.

“ Why ?” Juniper groaned. “I was so close.”

Her husband let out a deep laugh that reverberated through her. Then, she saw him gripping his length, coating it in that mixture of wetness. To make it easier, she realized.

“Ready?” he asked, once again running the tip back and forth, circling her clit to draw out a moan. She nodded, but that wasn’t enough. Bodin stopped at her entrance. “Out loud, June.”

Finding her voice, she said, “I’m ready.”

He kissed her so thoroughly, momentarily distracting her from what else was happening. Until she felt the pressure. As he slowly pushed into her, she squeezed her eyes shut.

“Look at me.”

Clenching her jaw, she opened her eyes and met his gaze. He rocked into her over and over, each time working his way a little deeper. Stretching her almost to the point of pain. Filling her so much she could barely breathe.

But it was also incredible, this connection with another person. This connection with him . This deep, mutual desire, respect, and… love. Because there was no denying that there was love between them. It might not have been the same type of love, but she could feel it in her soul. And that made this moment perfect.

It wasn’t painful or harsh, like she’d expected before meeting him. It was beautiful.

It was confirming the thought that had been growing louder in her mind for weeks.

She was home. She’d found where she belonged.

Bodin stopped suddenly, and her brow furrowed. Was that it? She looked down to find them fully pressed together. He was seated to the hilt and smiling at her again. He cupped the side of her face. “Breathe.”

His lips brushed her, and then he started moving again. She gasped with the first thrust, but those gasps quickly became moans as the slightly uncomfortable pressure eased into pleasure. Leaning down, he swirled his tongue around her breast before sucking a peaked nipple into his mouth.

“Oh, goddess above.” She groaned over and over with each new sensation. Her fingertips dug into the back of his shoulders as she gripped on to him, moving in sync with him, her body taking over on instinct. She needed more friction, more pressure. As if knowing exactly what she wanted, Bodin quickened his pace. He pulled out almost to the tip then slammed back into her. She let out a scream before she could stop herself.

He repeated the motion over and over, dragging out noises from her throat she didn’t know she was capable of making. Their ragged breathing mixed as he lifted his face near hers and lowered his hand to her clit.

“Bodin.” She couldn’t hold it in anymore, the incredible pressure building inside.

“Let go,” he said against her lips.

She wanted to. She was so close. But she couldn’t help but remember what happened earlier.

“It’s all right,” Bodin said, as if reading her mind. “Let go for me, Juniper. Let your light shine.”

The moment the words were out, she fell over the edge, no longer afraid to show her true self. The climax hit hard. She arched her back and yelled his name as she clenched around him. A white glow radiated from her skin, lighting up the room brighter than she’d ever seen it. He grunted and followed her over that cliff, spilling into her with a low rumbling growl. “ Fuck .”

She agreed but couldn’t form the words.

“Fuck,” he repeated quieter than before as he slowed his movements, easing her down from the state of euphoria she’d reached.

When he rose above her, she met his soft smile with her own. Her light reflected in his eyes, along with an emotion she couldn’t quite name, but as soon as she started worrying about it, he put a hand to her cheek.

“Don’t. You’re safe. I promise.” He touched a thumb to her lip. Her chest heaved still, brushing against his with each breath, and she nodded, believing him.

“That was…” She trailed off, still unable to find the right words.

Bodin seemed to understand though. “Perfect.”

She nodded again. “So perfect.”

He kissed her for a long minute before sliding out of her. Rolling over, he got out of bed to grab a cloth. He wet it in the basin near the wardrobe then brought it over to clean her up then himself. As he tossed the cloth aside and grabbed a blanket from the end of the bed to drape over them, she moved to his side. He pulled her into his arms, and she hooked an arm around his waist. Lying against him, she basked in what just happened. In all her reading and spying on maids to eavesdrop, she never heard about sex being this enjoyable. Not for a woman, and definitely not the first time, at least. Yet another difference between the two kingdoms, it seemed.

“How are you feeling?” Bodin asked in a quiet tone.

“Wonderful.” Yes, she was a little sore, but it wasn’t too bad. She wondered briefly if the effects of the Lumen magic helped with that as well. If she had a small amount of healing ability like many from Gilarn. She’d never been seriously injured before, so she wasn’t sure. Her light lasted longer this time, slowly fading as her heart calmed down. “I think we’ll need to try for an heir a lot. It’s very important for the kingdom, after all.”

His chest rumbled beneath her. “Oh, yes. We should do it as often as possible to help our chances.”

Juniper grinned, but it quickly vanished along with his dying laughter. “I don’t want you to leave tomorrow.”

“I know. But I’ll be back as soon as I can. I promise. I shouldn’t be gone for more than a couple of months.”

“Months?” she screeched, sitting up. “No. Absolutely not.” Her chest tightened.

“June—”

“No, Bodin. It’s too much.” She splayed her fingers over his heart. “Unless you want to take me?—”

“No.” His tone mirrored hers.

She’d expected that answer though. “Then, please, don’t be gone that long.”

He sighed. “Four weeks.”

“One.”

Gripping the back of her neck, he pulled her into a bruising kiss. “Three weeks,” he said, pulling back just enough to say, “It takes at least two days just to get there on horseback.”

“Two weeks, and you send a messenger at least a few times to let me know you’re all right, unless you’d like for me to come join you after that point.”

“Burning hells, woman.” He kissed her again, and again. “Next time I need to make negotiations with a pesky merchant or a foreign kingdom sending aid, you’re coming with me.”

Juniper narrowed her eyes, refusing to give in until he agreed. Though, internally, she was thrilled about the compliment.

“Fine,” he said. “Two weeks and a messenger.”

She leaned down to press her lips to his, and he hooked a hand behind her thigh to pull her on top of him. Straddling his waist, she felt him getting hard once more. He held on to her hips as the kiss deepened. His fingers tangled into her hair, and he pulled her head back so that he could brush his lips along the column of her throat.

“Two weeks,” she repeated as she slowly rocked on his hips.

“I promise. Now,” he guided her onto her knees to line him up with her entrance, “are you ready for round two?”

As Juniper sank down onto him, she wondered if they could go all night. She didn’t want to sleep because when she woke, it would be time for him to leave. Here, like this, she could pretend the rest of the world didn’t exist for a little while.

She could pretend that they would be together for the rest of their lives, that nothing would ever tear them apart.

She could tell herself that her husband loved her as much as she was falling in love with him.