Hero for the Holidays (Four Corners Ranch #9)

Chapter Nineteen

CHAPTER NINETEEN

B EING NEAR F IA without touching her was torture. But at least it was familiar. That was what he told himself as he brought another box up the front steps and into the farmhouse at Sullivan’s Point.

If his dad could see him now. Changing his whole life for a woman.

Two females, in fact. His daughter and Fia.

His dad would think he was weak.

That made Landry all the more confident in his decision.

King’s Crest had been home his entire life. But it had begun to feel fractured these past few weeks. Because it wasn’t complete. Because he and Lila weren’t complete when Fia wasn’t there.

Lila had been thrilled about the move, which had been a huge relief to Landry. He knew that it might have added to that anxiety she had about instability in foster care, and that was the last thing he wanted. But the idea of having her parents together...

He had been quick to make sure she knew they weren’t together. Not like that.

Though, the memory of their last time together, of kissing her, touching her, played out in his mind without his permission frequently. At all hours of the day, in fact.

“Moving is boring,” said Lila, hefting her own box into the house and setting it down on the ground before dramatically sinking into one of the bright turquoise chairs at the kitchen table.

Landry had to wonder if moving was more than boring for a girl who had been taken out of her home after losing her parents, and then shuffled around the system before having to make another big move out of the city she had grown up in.

Right at that moment, Fia appeared in the doorway and looked at him. He had a feeling they were thinking the exact same thing. They often were. As long as the topic was Lila.

It was refreshing to be on the same page as her at least.

“Let’s take a break,” said Fia.

“Really?” Lila asked.

“Yes. I think that we should pack up a picnic and go get a Christmas tree. Because this is going to be our first Christmas in the house together, and I want to get started with it as soon as possible.”

She shot Landry a questioning look. Holidays had been complicated so far. Birthday, Thanksgiving, because while Lila enjoyed them, they were also tangled around a lot of grief.

He moved over to where she sat in the chair and squeezed her on the shoulder. “I have an idea,” he said. “We can do things exactly the way your parents used to do them, or we can do something totally new. And that’s up to you. Whatever you want. Whatever feels right.”

“Something new,” Lila said. “Something different.”

“Okay,” said Landry.

“We can get a Christmas tree from our own property. Would you like that?”

“That sounds fun. We always used to go to a tree lot.”

With that decided, Landry and Lila helped Fia pack lunches. He made a note of where everything in the kitchen was so that he could be of help after he moved in. They might not be in a romantic relationship, but they were blending their lives together as a function of this new living arrangement. Roommates. They were roommates.

He felt his mouth flatten into a grim line.

But even if it was a strange way to find himself cohabitating with his ex-girlfriend, he intended to be a good...partner. They might not be partners in the romantic sense, but they were partners in parenting. And they would be partners in the day-to-day running of the household too.

He helped Lila get bundled up, and then they got into his truck and took a drive deep into the property. There were mountains on the back side of McCloud’s Landing, and he knew that they might find some snow there, which would make it both festive and fun.

“This is all still the ranch?” Lila asked, sounding dumbfounded.

“Yeah,” he said. “It’s the size of a town. I mean, technically it’s four different ranches, but only technically.”

“How did you get started again?”

“Well,” said Landry, “Fia is the best to tell that story. I’m the youngest in the King family. I didn’t have anything to do with establishing all of this.”

“And I was the youngest to be part of forming the board,” said Fia. “And the only woman. I was eighteen. It all happened not long after you were born. My mom was still around, but my dad had left, and she didn’t have any interest in running the place. So I...”

“You were seventeen?”

“Yeah. Still in high school. Trying to figure everything out. But I had already been through so many big changes in my life...”

“You could never have done all that if you had me, I guess,” said Lila.

He watched Fia’s face crumple, then it went smooth. “I worried about that. I had no idea how profoundly I was going to have to show up to represent Sullivan’s Point at that stage. But I did know that I had to take care of my sisters. My mom got better after my dad left, but even then, she was struggling. The responsibility was daunting.”

He wanted to touch her. Wanted to comfort her.

“Gus McCloud and Sawyer Garrett had been running McCloud’s Landing and Garrett’s Watch for a while. Denver had taken control of King’s Crest right before then too. But really it was... It was my dad vacating that kind of opened everything up. For us to try to reimagine it. I think we realized at that point we couldn’t really do it alone. Our parents had left things in a bad state. We had to figure out how to make it better. We all got together in the barn that we needed now on Sullivan’s Point. Sawyer led the discussion—it’s why he leads all the meetings now. Our families always had agreements, we always had certain things that we shared, but not on the level that Sawyer wanted us to try. He wanted us to share our finances. To support each other. And that’s how the official collective was born. We all chose which strengths we wanted to focus on.”

“I hope I’m like you,” said Lila.

Fia looked at him, her eyes wide, wild.

“Because you’re pretty badass. To be able to figure all those things out. I had it really easy for a long time, but things have been really hard the last couple of years. It makes me feel better. Knowing that I’m related to somebody who knew how to solve her problems. Even as young as you were.”

Fia’s gaze was watery now. “Thank you,” she said.

They reached the top of the mountain, where the trees had started to get substantial enough. They parked the truck and got out. He and Lila explored around the snowy area, looking for trees, while Fia hung back and set up the picnic in the bed of the truck. Though he had a feeling she was working to get her emotions straight. Hell, he was feeling a little wobbly himself. Lila had really seen Fia for what she was. Strong. Determined. Resilient. And that Lila saw those traits as things to emulate made him feel...proud of them both.

“What about this one?” Lila asked, standing in front of a bushy, misshapen beast that looked like the patriarch of the Charlie Brown Christmas tree.

“It’s lopsided,” he said.

“It’s imperfect, and I like it. It’s weird and unique, and I think it will be beautiful.” She leaned forward and gripped his arm, shaking it. “It’s us, Landry.”

She said it silly, but it still touched him. Deep in his soul. “Yes. It is.”

Fia came over just then. “What is it?”

“It’s the Gates-Sullivan-King tree,” said Landry, gesturing to the tree.

“Well, I love it,” said Fia. “Why don’t we eat first.”

They trundled back to the truck and got into the bed, where Fia had set out a blanket, hot chocolate and sandwiches.

They sat there in relative silence, with the cold air pressing in all around them and the snow making a cocoon around them.

The pine trees were capped with white, the mountains down below green.

“‘Have yourself a merry little Christmas,’” Fia started to sing.

He felt the corners of his mouth lift up. “‘Let your heart be light.’”

The three of them started singing together, their voices echoing around them. It was the most simple, glorious song he’d ever heard. The most perfect moment.

Landry had never given much thought to Christmas one way or the other, though Denver made a pretty big deal out of it because he had always tried to make life at King’s Crest better and more normal in the absence of their father. But nothing had ever been like this.

This simple carol, sung with his family.

His family.

After they finished, they got out of the truck and walked back over to the tree. Landry brandished his ax. “Get it, Landry!” Lila shouted.

Landry rolled his eyes, then started to cut down the tree.

“Very lumberjack,” said Fia.

“Stop objectifying me,” he said.

He turned around to look at her, and their eyes clashed. Heat flared between them, and he turned away again. Because this was supposed to be a wholesome family outing. Dammit. They were singing carols.

They got the tree chopped down and loaed into the back of the truck.

And began their journey down the mountain, singing “Jingle Bells,” and he tried to ignore all of the conflicting feelings in his chest. The deep emotion and the intensity, the heat that he felt when Fia looked at him.

They made it down to the house and carried the tree into the house and put it into its stand.

Fia got out all of her ornaments, and they began stringing lights and decorating, with Christmas music playing in the background. The music eventually got changed to Taylor Swift, which he insisted on singing, and loudly, because it horrified Lila.

They finished the tree, and Lila stood back, looking conflicted. “There is something I want to do,” she said.

“What’s that?” Fia asked.

“We had stars on the tree. With our names on them. They were made out of paper. I want... I want paper stars.”

He and Fia looked at each other, and the lump in his throat was so intense he was afraid to move. He didn’t want to go crying. In front of anybody. Not even himself. But this whole experience with Lila had been an exercise in getting in touch with emotions he liked to pretend he didn’t have. Turned out he had them.

Fia got down her kit filled with craft items. He really wasn’t surprised to find out she had that. She was handy, and made all kinds of decorations for the farm store. She knitted, she crocheted, she baked. Basically, if you could make it yourself, Fia did it. So she got down beautiful paper, scissors and glue. They sat at the kitchen table, which was brightly painted.

He touched its top. “You did this, didn’t you?”

He looked around the kitchen at the cheerful yellow cabinets. Red accents, bright everywhere.

“Yeah,” she said. “I couldn’t stand it being so dark anymore. I needed it to be different. I needed it to be ours.”

Yes. If Fia could make it, she would. She did.

They assembled 3D stars using ribbon and paper, putting patterned paper in certain sections of the stars, while leaving the other sections bright red. And on each one they wrote their names. Fia. Lila. Landry.

They hung them on the tree, just like that. With Lila between them.

Lila wrinkled her nose, and he could see that she was holding back tears.

“It feels like Christmas,” she said.

Landry put one hand on her shoulder. Fia put her hand on Lila’s other shoulder. “Yes,” said Landry. “Yes, it does.”

When Lila went up to bed, Landry and Fia sat in the kitchen for a while, saying nothing.

“Landry,” Fia said, looking up at him. “We need to get her a dog.”