No Ordinary Love (A Modern Vintage Romance #5)

9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Amara

A s much as I'd enjoyed living in Basil's house to regroup, now, nearly five months since I moved out of the townhouse, I had finally found a home. I'd stumbled upon it while house-hunting with Jax. He was looking for something sleek and modern, a statement piece in the heart of Charleston's historic district. This house was entirely wrong for him—too small, too humble, not nearly flashy enough. But for me, it was perfect.

Nestled just a short walk from South of Broad on a quiet, tree-lined street, the little two-bedroom cottage had a charm that wrapped itself around me the moment I stepped inside. It wasn't big or fancy. The white-painted brick, the dark green shutters, the small front porch with just enough space for a couple of rocking chairs—it was all so different from the grandeur of the townhouse I'd shared with Lucas. There were no ghosts here, no lingering memories to trip over at every corner. Just a fresh start.

The best part, though, was the garden. When I first saw it, overgrown and wild, my heart skipped a beat. It was a hidden gem behind the house, a tiny oasis enclosed by a weathered wooden fence. The previous owners had let it go, but I could see its potential. There was an old stone path leading to a small, worn bench beneath a sprawling magnolia tree; there were patches of wildflowers fighting to reclaim their space.

Since I moved in a week ago, I'd dedicated as much time as I could to planting new life and hoping to restore my backyard to its former glory. It was healing to get my hands dirty and coax beauty from the soil. It gave me a sense of control, of peace—all of which, I desperately needed.

Because even now, months after Lucas and I ended things, I was still struggling to patch up the wounds he'd left behind. I thought I'd been making progress, finally starting to rebuild my life without him. But that incident at the bar turned my world upside down all over again.

I didn't tell Jax what happened by the restrooms, but he guessed and didn't probe. I had talked to Gemma about it, and she was ready to knee Lucas in the nuts.

" Men are douchebags. They only want what they can't have. "

Ain't that the truth? Amen!

I felt like every time I thought I'd healed, Lucas would appear from left field. I felt his presence before I even saw him—like a shift in the air, a pull I couldn't ignore.

I still remembered how good it felt to be held by him again when he'd cornered me, his eyes dark and intense, full of everything I'd been trying to forget. Before I could process what was happening, he was leaning in, his breath warm against my skin.

I wanted to kiss him. I wanted him to kiss me .

My heart had lurched in my chest, confusion and anger warring with the part of me that still ached for him, that still remembered what it felt like to be his. But the moment passed as quickly as it came. I pulled away, the hurt slicing through me sharper than before. Jax and Kath were right out in the bar, oblivious to the turmoil happening just feet away.

How dare he?

Lucas had made his choice, and who he wanted in his life wasn't me. I had to remind myself of that as I had pushed him away and forced myself to walk back to the table, pretending like I wasn't seconds away from crumbling.

That night had sent me spiraling, undoing weeks of progress. I'd fallen into despair again, questioning everything—how I'd let Lucas get so close, how I still let him affect me. But the new house had been my salvation. It was a place to pour all of that pain, all of that longing, into something tangible, something that wasn't Lucas Fucking Covington.

As I stood in my little garden now, the late afternoon sun casting a warm glow over the freshly planted roses, I felt a sense of accomplishment, of quiet pride. This was my space. I'd built my beautiful sanctuary out of the rubble of what Lucas and I once were.

But even as I admired what I'd already achieved in the garden, I couldn't stop thinking about Lucas—about the kiss that never was, the moment that almost happened. It was infuriating how much power he still had over me, how he could shatter my peace with just a look, a touch, a near kiss.

I wiped my hands on my jeans, determined not to let those thoughts take root. This was my life now, and Lucas wasn't in it. I'd built my life again from the ground up, just like this garden. And no matter how many times Lucas tried to pull me back, I wouldn't let him ruin my hard-won calm.

I was moving forward, one step at a time, and I wasn't about to let him drag me back into the past. Not when I was finally starting to believe that I could be okay again.

My garden and my house weren't only a fresh start; they were a promise to myself, a recognition that I deserved better.

I wiped the dirt from my hands, standing back to admire the small herb garden I'd just finished planting. It wasn't much yet—just a few neat rows of basil, rosemary, and thyme—but it was a start. The house had become my little project, an outlet for my energy whenever memories of Lucas crept in, threatening to overwhelm me. It was mostly working. But there were still moments when I felt it all slamming down on me like a heavy fog.

I pulled out my phone, snapped a picture of the garden, and sent it to Basil.

My phone rang almost immediately. "Holy fuck, you've done some work out there, Sunshine."

I grinned. "It's looking really good, isn't it?"

"Show me more," he demanded. I hit the video call button and waited for him to accept, the screen filling with his grinning face as he appeared.

"Amara, that's impressive," Basil exclaimed as I angled the camera to give him a better view of my handiwork. "I didn't even know you gardened."

I laughed, feeling some of the day's tension melt away. "I didn't know either. But I'm spending an inordinate amount of time on YouTube learning the intricacies of planting bulbs in early Fall. It's been nice to have something besides work to focus on, you know?"

He nodded, his expression softening as he looked at me through the screen. "How are you really doing, Sunshine? Gemma told me about Lucas making a pass at you."

Making a pass made it sound tawdry, which it was.

I sighed, moving to sit on the small bench by the magnolia tree. "Honestly? It's been hard. Some days are better than others. That day when Lucas…you know…and days after were not good. This house has helped. It's nice to have a place that's all mine, without any memories of Lucas lurking in the corners."

"You deserve a fresh start, somewhere that's just for you. And this place looks perfect. But you know, Sunshine, you can't hide in your garden forever."

Basil just knew how to push my buttons. "I'm not hiding," I heatedly protested, though we both knew it was true. "I'm just…taking my time."

"Taking your time is one thing, but you also need to start living again. What about Jax? He seems like a good guy. Have you thought about giving things a real shot with him?"

I hesitated, biting my lip as I considered his question. "Jax is great. He's fun and easy to be around. I tried, but there's no chemistry for anything more than friendship. I don't want to lead him on or hurt him."

Basil's eyes narrowed thoughtfully. "I get that, Sunshine. But maybe you're overthinking it. It's okay to explore what's there, even if it's not fireworks right from the start. And as long as you're honest with him about where you stand, I don't think there's anything wrong with seeing where it goes."

"Are you saying I should use him as a rebound?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

He shrugged, a mischievous smile tugging at his lips. "If that's what you need right now, then maybe. Rebounds get a bad rap, but sometimes they're exactly what you need to move on. You know the saying about getting under someone to get over someone, don't ya? And Jax seems like the kind of guy who can handle himself. Just be upfront with him and see what happens."

I mulled over his words, letting them sink in. Basil had a point—maybe I was overthinking it. Jax was good to me, and I enjoyed spending time with him. Maybe it didn't have to be so complicated. Perhaps I could let myself have a little fun and explore a new relationship without the pressure of it turning into more.

"I don't want you to get a big head," I chuckled. "But, I think you're right. I've been so caught up in what might happen that I haven't allowed myself to just be in the moment."

"Dr. Dearden's pop-psych skills are always at your service." His smile widened. "And call me whenever you need to, okay? I'm always here, even if I'm all the way across the country."

"Ditto." My heart swelled with gratitude. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

"I'm glad you and I never have to find out what we'd do without each other," he said somberly. "Now, go text Jax and invite him over for dinner. You've got that new kitchen—you might as well put it to good use. And maybe…your new bed too?"

I laughed as I ended the call. Without allowing myself to ponder further, I pulled up Jax's contact and started typing.

Me: Hey, how about you come over for dinner tomorrow? I'll cook, and you can finally see how the garden is turning out.

I hit send before I could second-guess myself, and within moments, his reply came through.

Jax: Been dying to see it, darlin'. What time should I be there?

I smiled, a sense of anticipation bubbling up. This was a step forward into something new and just for me. It didn't need to be serious, permanent, or anything more than what it was.

Me: Let's say 7? Anything you don't eat?

Jax: I eat everything. But my favorite is…starts with P sounds like hussy.

I rolled my eyes at that. He was a consummate flirt and just what I needed right now. A little bit of fun and a man like Jax to pay me attention and heal my bruised heart and ego.