No Ordinary Love (A Modern Vintage Romance #5)

14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Lucas

T he low hum of cicadas filled the warm evening air as I walked up the familiar path to my grandmother's house. An old Charleston home that had been in the family for generations, it stood with a grand porch and towering oak trees draped in Spanish moss. I'd spent countless afternoons here as a kid, and every step felt like slipping back in time.

Grandma was on the porch, reading through some reports. She glanced up at me and grinned. I'd told her I was coming, and despite Rena Covington's hectic schedule, she never turned me down. If I needed her, she was there.

As usual, she looked elegant. Her silver hair was neatly pinned up, and her sharp eyes watched me with that knowing gaze that seemed to see things inside me I couldn't even see myself.

"Lucas," she greeted me as I reached the top of the steps, her voice warm.

I leaned down, kissed her cheek, and settled next to her on the couch. "Thanks for agreeing to see me."

"Always. What's on your mind?"

For a moment, I stayed silent, watching the fireflies dance in the garden, the scent of jasmine thick in the air. It was peaceful here.

"I'm freaking lost," I finally said.

"Hmm!" She mused, her tone measured, almost casual. "I have been hearing things about you and Amara, about you and Kath."

I nodded, not surprised. Nothing stayed secret for long in this family, and Rena Covington had a way of knowing things.

"What have you heard?" I asked wearily, my voice heavy.

She chuckled softly. "Your mother tells me that you're going to propose to Kath by Thanksgiving. Hugh says the same thing. But Jax tells me that you and Amara had an interesting conversation."

"Is Jax your spy, Grandma?"

She laughed and set the papers aside on the coffee table. "You want a drink?"

I shook my head.

"Jax is one of my favorite people, you know that," Grandma said.

I nodded.

Grandma and Jax's maternal grandmother had been close friends.

"I didn't like how you treated Amara, how Patsy did, how Shelby…apparently, still does," she continued. "At the Magnolia Ball, I made sure Amara would be in attendance, and I asked Jax to take care of her. I also wanted to wake you the hell up."

"I didn't know I was asleep," I murmured.

"You have been about Kath."

"It's complicated, Grandma," I protested.

My feelings for Kath were muddled. The past feelings were honest, but they were not my present, and it was taking me some time to figure that shit out.

"Oh, Lucas. Life's always complicated, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. But that's what makes it worth living."

I sighed, running a hand through my hair, the frustration building up inside me. "Kath, Hugh, Mama…they've all been pushing me to commit, to make things official with Kath. But it doesn't feel right. It doesn't feel like it used to. And then there's Amara. I can't get her out of my head. I miss her. I think about her all the damn time."

She turned to look at me, her eyes sharp but not unkind. "Lucas, did I ever tell you about my first husband?"

I frowned. "Your only husband, you mean? Grandpa?"

She took a deep breath. "I was married once before your grandfather. It didn't last long, but it taught me some hard lessons."

I stared at her, shocked. I'd never heard anything about a first marriage, not from her or anyone else in the family. "You were married before Grandpa?"

"Close your mouth, darling, before you eat a bug or two," she teased, and then her expression became pensive. "His name was Otis, and I married him because it was expected of me. Our families were close, and everyone thought we were the perfect match. But it wasn't love, Lucas. It was convenience. And it was a mistake ."

She paused as if letting the memory settle before continuing. "He wasn't a bad man, but we weren't right for each other. The marriage was miserable. We hurt each other. It was an excruciating year. Finally, we divorced, and I was left with nothing but regret and the realization that I had let everyone but myself decide my future."

I didn't know what to say. This was a side of my grandmother I'd never seen, a vulnerability she'd never shown before. "I'm so sorry, Grandma."

She smiled a little sadly. "I'm not. The experience taught me an important lesson. Life is too short to live it for someone else. You have to follow your heart, even if it leads you down a path that others don't understand."

"And what if you don't know what you want?" I wondered.

"You know what you want, Lucas; you're just afraid to admit it because it goes against being a Covington. When your father married Patsy, I tried to tell him not to worry about mergers and acquisitions and to marry for love. But you know how business-minded he was. So, he married your mother, and that was another miserable marriage."

I shrugged. "At least they never fought."

"They lived separate lives," Grandma all but growled. "Calvin slept around and Patsy became one of those desperate housewives who spend their time gossiping and manipulating lives. You want to marry your mother?"

"Kath is nothing like Mama," I replied. "Kath has a career."

"Regardless of their employment status or hobbies, they are similar people." Grandma's stern voice could cut steel. "Don't fool yourself. If you love Kath, fine, marry her. But if you loved her, then you'd be head over heels wanting to marry her, not sitting here telling me that you can't stop thinking about Amara."

I groaned and dropped my face in my hands.

Grandma smacked the back of my head lightly. "Get your head out of your ass, Lucas."

I chuckled and looked up to see her annoyed eyes glaring at me.

"Are you so weak that you'll let family pressure you into marrying Kath?"

I arched an eyebrow. "Are you trying to get a rise out of me with the weak comment?"

She grinned. "Absolutely."

I draped an arm around her and leaned my forehead against her shoulder. "I fucked up. I knew Amara would never fit in, and when Mama told me about Kath, I spoke some bullshit."

"Amara heard you."

I nodded. "Yeah, and then I proceeded to take the coward's way out by letting her walk out of my life because stopping her meant that I had to turn against my family."

"And let's not forget your pride. You weren't going to beg Amara to stay."

I took a deep breath. She knew me well.

"And the same pride was assuaged that Kath wanted back in your life. Mercer had dumped her—"

"She told me she left him."

Grandma gave out an unladylike snort. "He got his side piece pregnant and decided to marry her . Mercer and Kath lived together and got engaged, but he didn't marry her. That tells me he was never going to."

I wondered why Kath was with me; was it familial pressure? We started going out as kids after LPC acquired Bellamy Foods. I'm sure her father and mine thought it was the perfect arrangement. Maybe she realized that she didn't love me and left me for Mercer because she loved him. I remembered how angry Hugh had been with her for that.

"Do you think Kath is being pressured to marry me?"

"Kath? No. That girl is so selfish that she does whatever she wants without thought or care for anyone but herself."

"That's a rather harsh assessment."

Was Kath selfish? Yes, she was, but wasn't everyone?

"Kath left you because Mercer was already running his father's company, and you weren't. Then he left her, and now she's back because you've taken over LPC and have done great things in the three years you've been CEO. You're now more successful than Mercer." Grandma did not mince her words. "It didn't matter to her that you were living with another woman; she basically bulldozed in and got you."

"She didn't bulldoze—"

"You think your mother didn't know that Amara was listening to your conversation with her?" Grandma seethed.

"What?" Shock ran through me. "No!"

Grandma rolled her eyes and looked at me like I was an imbecile. "Ask Jerome. Patsy may not have made you say you didn't love Amara, but she had a pretty good idea what you would say about Kath."

"Even Mama isn't that devious." I couldn't believe that my mother would purposely sabotage my relationship with Amara and hurt an innocent in the process. But then again, it took only a moment's thought for me to admit that Mama had been doing everything she could to break Amara and me up since I introduced her to the family.

"Lucas, what do you want?" Grandma demanded, her eyes searching mine.

I spoke from my heart, the truth finally breaking free. "Amara. I don't know how it happened, but I fell in love with her. And I've been too scared to admit it, too scared to go after what I really want because it doesn't fit into everyone else's idea of what my life should be."

She reached out and took my hand in hers, her grip surprisingly strong. "Then don't make the same mistake I did. Don't let fear or obligation dictate your life. Kath is not the one for you. I could always see that, even if you're only now starting to realize it yourself."

I nodded, my heart heavy with a certainty I'd been avoiding for so long. "I know. I think I've known for a while, but I didn't want to admit it. It's easier to stick with what's familiar, even if it's wrong."

She smiled, a twinkle in her eyes. "What are you going to do about Jax?"

I blinked. "I thought he was taking care of her because you asked him to."

"Have you seen them together? They have so much chemistry."

I wasn't sure if she was teasing or serious. "Amara told me they're just friends."

"But imagine if they weren't. How would it make you feel?"

"Devastated."

"Good. Now you know how she feels. So, when you go to her, go on your knees. Go with humility. You wronged her ."

I sat back down. "I already put my foot in it."

I told her about my phone conversation with Amara.

She laughed, a soft, knowing sound. "Good for her! I hope she makes you crawl. I've always liked Amara. She's real, Lucas. She's got that fire, that spirit that you need in your life. She's not like Kath, with all the pretenses and the games."

"I know." Fuck if I didn't.

"Why do you think Jax likes her so much? He's sick of the society types after what happened with Daniela."

Jax had once dated the love of his life, a woman who wanted to get married and start a family right away. She expected him to give up golf and join the family business. He'd wanted her support; she'd wanted to be married to the Caldwell heir. Dani moved on quickly, marrying into another family just like hers, just like mine—and since then, Jax hadn't been in a relationship with any woman.

"I know you like to work with facts. So, here it is. Kath betrayed you once before, and even if she's changed, the foundation of your relationship is shaky at best. Amara, on the other hand, has got her feet firmly on the ground. She's someone you can build a life with, someone who will stand by you through thick and thin. That is if you can convince her to give your sorry ass a second chance."

"Thanks for your faith in me."

"I have faith in you , but not your groveling skills. Let go of your pride and ego; they're not important. She is. Go after her, Lucas. Don't let fear or obligation hold you back. Life is too short for regrets."