Relentless Sinner

Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

Jaxon

The cold silence of tension surrounds us like a thick fog of acrid smoke. It’s almost as tangible as Gabriella and I sitting next to each other in the back seat of the car.

Andrieu is driving while Vladmir is in the passenger seat. I imagine that having the two of them here along with me must feel like overkill to Gabriella. Good.

Let her feel scared.

Let her tremble in her skin and feel the weight of her actions.

Let her think of me as the asshole. Her monster. Her villain .

I’m pissed as fuck. Anything could have happened to her. I don’t know what the fuck she was thinking.

Okay, that’s not true. I do know.

She wants her freedom, but she wasn’t thinking about the risk of getting it. People seldom do. They think if they can just reach a certain point, they’ll know what to do after.

That’s the part that could get you killed. Or in her case taken captive by someone worse than me.

Her father is on the lookout for any cracks in my fortress for him to get a foot in and seize her. She knows that.

I guess to her it was still worth the risk.

I have to hand it to Cora. She came up with a solid plan that would have had even me running around in circles for weeks.

If I hadn’t overheard that phone call this morning everything would have been so much harder. In fact, I’ll admit, there’s a good chance I may not have found Gabriella at all. Which I suppose could mean her father may not have found her, either.

It would all depend on whether he knew about the house in Isla del Ciervo. Even if he didn’t I imagine he may have found out easier than I did since he’s part of the family.

I was able to get those details when my men caught up with the guys Cora hired and beat the information out of them.

I learned everything else about her sister’s location today, although I’d figured out what country they were in the other week. It played on my mind so I did some digging around. I realized the name Sere referenced in the email Natasha sent Gabriella referred to the artist.

But the main clue was talking about praying with their mother. I looked at some details about their mother and saw that she spent some time in that church in Marseille when she was alive.

With the need to be extra careful these days, I found Natasha and Alessandro all on my own without getting help from the usual people I’d call on to dig for information. I felt it was best that I keep the information to myself for the moment. So I even fucking hacked into the church’s surveillance system and took the picture from the footage of them.

The car slows for traffic and I glance at Gabriella, at the perfect outline of her beautiful face. She’s gazing out the window and doing her best not to see me.

Feeling my gaze on her, she turns inward even more. She’s so tense that one more twist will make her neck snap.

The last time we were in a car together I wanted her so badly I took us into the woods, where I devoured her in the back seat. I was barely able to drive us home because as soon as I was finished with her, I wanted her again.

I ended up fucking her on the hood of the car the moment I parked in the garage. She wanted me, too. Just as much as I wanted her. Now she doesn’t even want me to look at her, much less touch her.

I know I’ve spoiled what we had but that was inevitable. We want conflicting things.

I also know she fully believes I took pleasure in watching her squirm in terror as I doled out my threat to her sister. I didn’t.

I didn’t enjoy showing her the nasty side of me and watching her stare back at me with disappointment, hurt, and regret in her eyes, knowing the feelings she had for me would turn to dust. Nor did I enjoy listening to her practically begging for her freedom and denying her.

Letting her go and knowing I’d never see her again sliced into me deeper than the loss of the empire. I know that’s saying a fuck of a lot, and I don’t know how to deal with that revelation.

I remind myself again that she was only supposed to be a contract. I always felt that I could live with an arranged marriage because it meant I didn’t have to feel anything. But all that changed the moment I met her.

The dark silence and tension grow between us with every passing second. By the time we reach home—over an hour later—the air is so thick I could cut it with a knife.

When Andrieu parks outside the house I make sure I get out first because I can see Gabriella gearing up to storm off inside. I won’t have her throw a tantrum—even a silent one—in front of the men.

I walk around to open the door for her and when she steps out she summons the filthiest look imaginable and throws it at me. Then she’s as stiff as a board when I lead her into the house.

I note the way her gaze flicks around the hallway from wall to wall when we walk in. As if she’s acknowledging she’s back in this house and that she failed.

Today was supposed to be goodbye.

Sorry that I’m not sorry, Krasota.

She says nothing to me once we reach the stairs and she continues up. I stay where I am, deciding to give her some space.

I need to speak to Eve then catch up on some work and check in with the men who are keeping eyes on Damian and the other members of my family.

I decided to travel to Italy with Cillian tomorrow. Micah and I were going to get there ahead of time to see his family. It’s not possible for me to link up with them now. I also feel that, in light of Gabriella’s thwarted escape plan, I need to be around until morning. Not because I think she’s going to try to escape again. But because I feel like my presence needs to be here.

I find Eve in the kitchen writing the grocery list. She’s standing by the island jotting down some items. When I walk in she stops and looks at me.

“Did you find her?” she asks, her eyes filling with concern. I’m not sure if the emotion is for Gabriella or for me. I know she feels sorry for Gabriella and was never a fan of this plan to force her to marry me. At the same time she feels sorry for me, too. She knows my family situation and how badly I want the empire.

“I did. She’s gone upstairs.” I walk up to the counter, rest my hands on the surface and release a haggard sigh.

“How is she?”

“Pissed with me. I guess that’s to be expected.”

She doesn’t answer or react except to press her lips together in that habitual look of displeasure. It would be unbecoming of her to do anything else regardless of being right or wrong.

Eve has worked for my family since before I was born. She was Jacob’s nanny, then she became his maid when he left home.

She took care of me when I was little, too, but Jacob got her because the best was supposed to go to him. It was my father’s order. I didn’t get her until Jacob died.

Through the years she’s always been the same. Only speaking when necessary and never out of context or out of line. I expect her to be the same way with me now.

“What would you like me to do?” She studies my face.

She’s asking that question because she was the first person I informed about Gabriella’s plans to leave today.

“Just act normal. Gabriella will know I spoke to you, so no point acting like you don’t know what’s happened.” I often find that causes more problems and distrust.

“Okay, I can do that. Did you want me to go speak to her?”

“No. She needs to cool off.” I need to cool off, too. “Just let today pass and pick up in the morning.”

“Alright. What about you? Do you need to talk?”

I shake my head. It’s best I say nothing. She won’t like anything I have to tell her. In fact, I know I’ll disappoint her.

“You know she’ll want to see her cousin, right?” Eve raises a questioning brow. “And keeping her locked away in the room will make it worse.”

In all the time I’ve known her that’s the closest she’s ever come to speaking her mind. I know it’s because this is a new situation for both of us.

I’ve never kept a woman captive before and Eve is practically my accomplice.

“I need to make sure Gabriella knows where we stand.”

“I don’t believe you have to worry about that. The fact that she’s here means she knows where you stand.” She straightens and stares at me with that motherly warmth in her eyes I’ve always been fond of. “Forgive me, may I speak freely?”

As if she wasn’t already doing that. “You may.”

“As horrible as your father was and still is—may God forgive me for speaking ill of a dying man…” She pauses and makes the sign of the cross over her heart. “He cherished your mother. His marriage was never about business. I want the same for you. I think you could have that with Gabriella. But it’s up to you. It all depends on whether you want a business arrangement or a wife .”

My breath stills and knots in my lungs, fighting to break free of the rage roiling inside me. I want to tell her business is business and I don’t care about having a wife when I have a multibillion-dollar empire at stake. But the words don’t come.

“I’ll figure it out, Eve,” I say, knowing that’s not really the answer she was hoping for. I just can’t think right now or see past the red waves of rage still blazing before me.

“Okay. Let me know if you need anything.”

“Of course.” I dip my head and make my way to my office.

I grab a bottle of Scotch from the cabinet, pour myself a glass, then knock it back, savoring the malt taste in the back of my throat. It’s swiftly followed by a rush that gives my mind the chill I crave. The only other thing that could mellow me out is fucking.

That’s not really an option right now because the only woman I want to fuck wouldn’t want me to touch her.

Everything is so fucking messed up. And I’m a mess.

The problem here is that I’ve allowed Gabriella to get under my skin. We’re not even at the finish line yet. Things will only start moving when we take our vows and become husband and wife.

Until then I’m still flying blind.

I plop myself down in my chair, open my computer and start running through my emails.

I do that for a few hours and finish off the bottle of Scotch. I check the time and see it’s after eleven.

I’ve got to get to bed. I have an early flight in the morning.

With that in mind I shut everything down and make my way upstairs to the bedroom. The lights are turned off and I can see Gabriella’s still form on the bed.

She would appear to be asleep but she’s not. I can tell the difference no matter how realistic she may seem to be.

I jump in the shower quickly and when I get back out to the room I notice she’s lying on her side facing the wall.

She turns her head slightly to look at me, then looks away again. I’m glad she’s given up pretending.

I get in the bed and slide in next to her. Instantly her body goes rigid, back to that tense state.

“Am I your prisoner again?” Her voice, still and soft, finally pierces the endless silence between us that has been festering like an open sore oozing blood.

I turn and look at her. She’s still got her back to me but in the silver moonlight I can see her breathing has picked up.

Eve’s words come back to haunt me. Do you want a business arrangement or a wife?

I want Gabriella. That’s my answer. But right now that answer seems to sit somewhere in the gray area where all that exists is conflicting desires.

The air becomes charged with more tension the longer I wait to answer her question. There are several things I want to say, all of which she won’t like, so I decide to follow my head with the same answer I gave her weeks ago. “That depends on you, Krasota.”

She looks at me now and I can tell she’s been crying. “What does that even mean for me now?”

She’s right. She’s in limbo because she fucked up her previous plan of making it look like she was doing what she was told. She knows the trust is broken and I’ll be more careful now. “Get some sleep. We’ll talk about it some other time.”

It’s best we don’t talk about it now.

I don’t want her to hate me any more than she already does.