Shadowing My Dreams (Haunted Hearts)

Chapter 11

11

Jack

“ G ood morning,” I opened the door and grinned at Arch. He looked even better today than he did yesterday, and I had to stop myself from asking himto go to his place and have my way with him right there. That was something that old Jack would do. I wanted a chance at something more. Slower might be better even if it was harder, and making me very hard in the process.

“Hi,” he replied bashfully.

I stepped outside and gestured for him to step backward. “Is it safe?” I held out my hand. “I really want to kiss you.”

“I don’t know,” he said huskily.

“Why don’t we…” I stepped forward, wrapped my arms around his waist, and pulled him into me. “see?” I bent down and tilted his chin up. Our lips met, and I stayed there for a second with my eyes open. Nothing changed. Then I kissed him the way he deserved to be kissed. Deeply – passionately – the way I wished I had kissed him last night. God, the thoughts that zoomed through my head as I tried to go to sleep were all of him and what I wanted to do with him. How I wanted to hear him laugh and moan as I entered him.

I was still a man whore. At least it wasn’t only my pleasure I was concerned with.

He placed his hands on my chest and I ground myself against him. My cock strained at the fabric of my shorts. “I’m fucking dying here,” I whispered into his mouth.

“Stop, Jack,” he giggled, and his voice sounded like the purest of bells. “We have work to do. Once we do this, we can do… that. Maybe?”

“Implication noted. But maybe? Oh, definitely. I just have to get my uh…” I gestured down at my hard cock. It stood out straight as it pushed against the fabric. The waistband stretched with its effort.

“That’s uh… wow. I don’t think I’ve…” His blush was fucking hot.

“It’ll fit. Trust me.” I chuckled and turned back to my open front door. “You coming? You soon will.”

“Stop. I have to concentrate, and you make me… you make that hard to do.” He said so bashfully that I had to stop myself from kissing him again.

“More hard ?” I smirked. “Harder? I don’t think it will get much harder, Arch.”

“God, you’re horrible. We went on one… uh…”

“Date? You can say the word.”

“Fine. Date.”

“You had fun. I know I did.”

“Yes, it was good to get to know more about you. You’re not exactly as I thought you were.”

“Well, I hope you’re ok with how I am because you did just let me play tonsil hockey.”

“God, you’re such a bro.”

“I think you like that, too.”

“I do not.” He clapped his hands and looked up the stairs. “We have work to do, Jack. I have information that will help us now that he sent over all the information.”

“You found out something.”

He nodded. “His name is Isaac Nelson – I think. It makes sense for that to be him. The previous owner kept all of her records, and he sent mea ton of scanned papers. No wonder it took so long. I should send him a thank you. Maybe a Doordash certificate.”

“What did you find out?”

“Isaac died in eighty-four. It doesn’t say anything more than he had been sick and died of natural causes. Maybe it was cancer? Maybe it was something else. But he died in the house. California law makes you tell new tenants or any kind of sale of property when someone has died in the place within ten years. It’s on all the records.”

“Why wasn’t I told that?”

“Are you listening? It’s only within ten years of the death, and you bought this place decades later, Jack.”

“He is the only person that I could find who died here. It has to be him.”

“What are we going to do? You’re gonna make me go back up there and touch you, right?”

“At least you get to touch me.”

“True.”

“Are you ok?

“Knowing he’s a gay man and sarcastic as shit makes him less scary to me, you know? It’s like he’s… I don’t know. Family? A part of the gay family. So am I. I woke up today feeling like he wasn’t a threat. He’s just angry and sad.”

“Alone for all these years.”

“Yeah. Instead of being scared, I think I may be invested. You said something last night that made me… He deserves a happy ending, doesn’t he?”

“He sure does. Hopefully, we can give that to him. Knowing his name and a little about him will help. Maybe we can reach him in some way this time?”

“Now?”

“No time like the present.”

I followed him up the stairs and noticed that he was wearing shorts today. His white legs were peppered with what looked like the softest of red hair and freckles. I bet his whole body was covered in freckles, and I wanted to trace them into different patterns with my finger after I made him moan my name. I had it bad, and I was just diving into the deep end. How weird that I wanted this – him – something more than a fantastic fuck and a see you around. I wanted the always around part with him, and I hoped he felt the same way. I wasn’t even freaked out by it – and old me would have definitely been freaked. Hell, I would have denied it.

“Are you ready?” Archie held out his hand and without even second guessing myself I took it and held onto him firmly. The world shifted and we stepped into the in-between where a disgruntled gay ghost was already shaking his head at our presence.

“Are you serious? Why has the friend’s of Dorothy committee reconvened. I thought you understood that I didn’t want to participate in your gay games.” The ghost, Isaac (maybe), was on fire today. I hiccupped my laugh back, and we stepped into the room. I glanced over at Arch, and the color was already draining from his face. Honestly, he didn’t have much to drain with his iridescent skin.

“Isaac Nelson,” Archie said calmly. “Is that your name?”

“Oh, God,” he sighed. “They think we’re friends.”

“You’re dead, and we’re alive, but we don’t have to be enemies.”

“Well, tell me something I don’t already know, please? I’m dead? How will I ever go on living with that knowledge,” he chuckled. “Oh, wait! I don’t have to because I’m fucking dead.”

“And stuck in this place. Why have you stayed behind?”

“You’re very bland, and you’re destroying my peace. Seriously, you should find a tanning bed because your pasty skin is glaring and hard to look at.”

“Why did you stay? Tell us, Isaac, we want to help. It’s what we do. We’re not here to…”

“Annoy me? Too late.”

“We’re not here to force you to leave. You’re staying here for a reason – what is it?”

“Love, you little fool. I have stayed here staring out this window, waiting for love. Now, will you please leave, or are you going to continue boring me to death?”

“Love? You’re waiting for someone.”

“How astute. Give the big lug a ribbon for stating the obvious.”

“You died before he did, and you’re sitting here waiting for him to come back to you. That’s very romantic.”

“Call me Jane Austen, and I’ll call you Edgar Allen Poe. I mean, you do speak to spooks. Boo!” he teased, but he was anything but scary to me now. He was actually quite funny, and in life, I would have liked to know him.

“You’re waiting on your lover? What was his name? Maybe he’s still alive, or maybe he crossed over, thinking you would have done the same. You’re waiting here, but you have absolutely no idea, do you? That’s so sad. Let us help you. Please?” I walked closer to him and pulled Archie behind me. He was dragging his feet.

“I hope he lived. Waiting for him here has been… I’m not usually this put out, but when you’ve been put to pasture, and no one seemed to care – It was a disheartening death. One of thousands upon thousands by now, I’m sure.”

“You had AIDS?” I realized what he was saying.

“Had being the operative word. There is no AIDS in death, just loneliness and pensiveness like a boy holding onto a secret. All of us gays held onto a secret that we weretoo scared to let people know. Those secrets were as toxic as the fucking disease. They both rot you from the inside. Only one of them kills you, though.”

“Do you know what year it is?”

“Why should I fucking care?”

“You died forty years ago. The world has changed so much. Being gay isn’t… We don’t have to keep that secret anymore. Not like we used to. Now, kids come out much younger than even my generation did. Things got better.”

“AIDS? Is HIV still a thing?”

“Yes, but it no longer is as it was either. People can now live with HIV, and we have real drugs that keep you undetectable.”

“WE even have a drug to take if you’re having sex that helps prevent you from getting it,” Archie added and gestured over to the bed. We walked over, and he sat down. “If you aren’t sick – why do you still carry it with you?”

“Hmm… Do I? I didn’t know. I’m dead and feel nothing but my own emotions, and even they’re more muted than they were in life. It’s hard to even work up a good hissy.”

“You are free from disease, Isaac. Let it go – please? It’s tearing me apart.”

“How?”

“Let go of the past and your anger. Whatever – whyever you are punishing yourself – you have to let it go.”

“You make it sound so easy. You have no idea what I did.”

“I think I do. You were living your life the best way you knew how – like every gay man in the seventies and eighties. You were punished by that fucking disease for living. It wasn’t God’s plan or retribution for sin; it was just something that happened, and we were its first victims. You can choose to stop being a victim.”

“We can’t stay any longer. Isaac, you’re hurting him.”

“I… I’m not trying to, I… Fuck… He was so hot, and I never even knew his name. I knew it was risky, but at the time, I only knew a couple of people who had gotten sick. This was, in the beginning, understand. The problem was we didn’t understand anything. No one was giving us real information. He didn’t have a condom – I hated them, anyway. I know how I got it, and I’m so scared that Drew died the same horrible way that I did.”

“What was Drew’s last name? We’ll see what we can find out. We want to help you, Isaac.”

“Parker. Drew’s name was Andrew Parker.”

I let go of Arch’s hand and he fell over on his knees. He was weak and I helped him up and slowly walked him to the bathroom.

“I… I don’t think I’m gonna… Get out!” He gestured, and I understood. I turned and shut the door behind me.

Andrew Parker.

“I hear you, Isaac. Rest and let go of your pain. It’s going to be ok.” I spoke to the windowsill and smiled at the fact that I just had a conversation with a ghost, and I wasn’t running for my life like a little asshole. It was because that the very cute boy who was puking in the bathroom had been by my side, and I trusted him.

I trusted him enough to do this, and I would do it again as long as he was by my side.