The Risks We Take Duet Box Set

50. Carys

CARYS

I n the month since Nattie and Brady’s wedding, I’ve become really good at acting like I’m okay. Maybe I should have been a Broadway actress, after all. I’ve cracked a few times, but for the most part, I’ve done a pretty good job of hiding my pain.

I’ve noticed I now eat my feelings.

Not the best move, but I’m still running in the mornings, so it’s not effecting my health or the size of my ass just yet.

I haven’t heard from Cooper since that morning in the rain.

It’s what I wanted. What I knew we needed. But I fucking hate myself a little more each day. Chloe, Daphne, her roommate, Maddie, and I have been trying to do regular brunch dates at the Busy Bee. Everyone’s lives have gone a little crazy this summer, so it’s been a good time each week to sit down and laugh at our problems, instead of crying over them.

With our food mostly eaten, we’re just bullshitting at this point when Maddie looks at Chloe. “So, Chloe...” She waits dramatically for Chloe to stop running her finger through the syrup and look up. “Did Daphne tell you Watkins asked for your number?”

Oh holy shit. Watkins plays on the Philadelphia Kings team with Declan and Maddie’s brother, Brandon.

“Um, no.” Chloe eyes me with a smile. “But I’m pretty sure that’s a big old no. Our inner circles are already a little too incestuous, if you ask me. I will not be dating your brother’s work wife, Mads.”

I slap a hand over my face to hide the obnoxious laugh threatening to break free. “Oh my God. His work wife. That’s great.”

Chloe’s phone vibrates against the table, and she silences it. “It’s Nattie. I’ll call her back. She probably just wants to make sure I’m going to watch the game. Like I haven’t seen enough of our brothers playing football to last a lifetime.” Brady and Aiden were both drafted to the Maryland Sentinels last spring.

The phone vibrates again, and Chloe blows out a breath, then slides her finger over it. “Nat, I’m out at breakfast with the girls. Can I call you after?” Whatever she just said has Chloe’s face going terrifyingly white as she looks over at me. “Breathe, Nattie. I need you to breathe. Where’s Brady?”

My heart skips a beat. “What’s happening?”

Chloe ignores me and looks across the table toward Daphne.

“Well, call his coach, Nat. Call Murph.” She sits quietly for a minute, refusing to meet my eyes. “Hang up the phone, Nat. I’m calling Sabrina to come over until we can get Brady. Give me a few minutes, and I’ll call you back.” She sucks in a sharp breath. “I love you too, Nat. Call his coach. I’ll get Brina there as soon as I can.”

She ends the call and refuses to meet my eyes.

It’s as if a vacuum has sucked all the oxygen from the room, and I can’t breathe.

“Chloe...” My body starts shaking as the tears pool in my eyes. This can’t be... “What happened?” I push the question past my lips.

Chloe takes a handful of money from her purse and throws it on the table. “We’ve got to go.” She pushes me out of the booth, and I vaguely hear her say something to Daphne.

I turn around once we’re outside the Busy Bee and grab hold of her arm with shaking hands and whisper, “What. Happened?” Terrified of her answer in a way nothing has ever scared me before in my life.

“Let’s go to your mom’s, Care Bear.” Chloe looks over my head toward Daphne and Maddie, and I snap. My entire body is strung tight when I claw at her.

“Chloe,” I beg through the tears that are pouring down my face. “Please, just tell me. I need to know.” When Chloe doesn’t answer, a guttural scream scratches up my throat. “Tell me!”

Chloe grabs my hands while Maddie and Daphne gather around me. “It’s Cooper.”

No.

It hurts to breathe.

“Is he dead?” The words are barely above a whisper as I shake uncontrollably.

Chloe tilts her head to the side, and a tear leaks down her cheek. “We don’t know. His unit... They were captured.”

There’s a gut-wrenching cry ringing in my ears as my legs give out, and I fall to the sidewalk.

The sound is horrific.

Like a dying animal.

Someone make it stop.

Please .

It isn’t until Chloe grabs my face in both of her hands and yells my name that I realize the sound is coming from me.

T ime is a funny thing. It plays with your brain.

I’m not sure how long I’ve been sitting on Coach’s couch, waiting for a breadcrumb of information from whoever called Coach with the news in the first place when it dawns on me I have my own people to call.

When I stand, Chloe stands with me, but I shake my head. Declan and Belles watch from the other side of the sectional couch.

“I can call my old roommate,” I announce. “She’s married to Linc. Or Cooper’s team leader’s wife. Either one of them might have more information.”

Declan stands and presses his hand to the small of my back like his brother’s done so many times. “Come on, Carys. Let’s go to the other room.”

We walk into the dining room, and I grab my cell phone from my pocket with shaking hands, then look up at Declan. “What if we don’t want to hear what she says?”

“He’s fine, Carys. Cooper’s too fucking stubborn not to be fine. And I think you know that.” He holds me against him, supporting my shaking body, and I call Emerson and hit the speakerphone so Declan can hear.

It rings three times, and I think I’m about to be sent to voice mail when Jack answers, “Carys. Jesus Christ, Carys, are you okay?”

The sobs I’ve been trying to control since we got here push from my lungs. “No. I’m not okay, Jack. Is Em okay? What does she know? So far, all anyone has told us is that they’ve been captured.”

“We’re at Jessie and Ford’s house. Emmie just wanted to be with Jessie.” The strain is audible in Jack’s voice.

“Can I talk to one of them, Jack? I need to know if they have more information than we do.” I force my legs not to give out from beneath me as I push away thoughts of never seeing him again.

“Carys?” Jessie’s hoarse voice comes through the phone.

“Jessie...” We both cry. “Please tell me someone gave you more than they’re giving us.”

“It’s not good, Carys. I’m waiting to hear back from one of the guys who called me earlier. He wasn’t supposed to, but he did. They’re hurt, Carys.”

Declan’s fingers tighten against my shoulders, and I look up to see everyone standing in the doorway. Nattie and Brady must have gotten here at some point because she’s standing in his arms, shaking, while Coach and Mom push into the room.

“What do you mean, Jessie? Who’s hurt? What happened? Do they know where they are?” Everyone in the room starts talking at once, and I yell at them all, “Stop! I can’t hear her.” I move out of Declan’s arms and pace the room. “What the hell’s happening, Jess?”

“I’m not sure, but I got a call from one of the guys from a different team who I know. He said they’re hurt but not captured. They couldn’t find them in the rubble, so they thought... But they’re not...” She tries to stay calm, but I don’t think any of us are capable of that right now. “He wasn’t sure of anything yet, Carys. But I can call you back the second I get word from him, or the official call. But I’ll get it from him before that.”

“I love you, Jess.” A tear hits my phone, and I wipe my face.

“Love you too, Carys. Stay strong. That’s what they’d want.”

We end the call, and I turn to look at the entire family staring at me. “You heard what she said. According to her guy, they’re not captured, but they might be hurt.”

They look at me curiously until Coach gives me a strong hug. “Alright, everyone. We have no idea how long it’s going to be before we know anything. So, we might as well all get comfortable.”

The doorbell rings, and we all jump, then Mom rushes to answer it.

I hold my breath, praying it’s not the military on the other side.

She opens it slowly and exhales loudly when a delivery man is there with a huge tray of food. Declan crosses the room and takes it from the man, then lays it down on the kitchen table. “It’s from Max Kingston.”

Max’s family owns the Philadelphia Kings football team that Coach coaches and Declan plays for. He’s also Daphne’s boyfriend.

Coach walks into the room. “Max had the team jet fly the kids in from Maryland earlier, and he told me it’s ours if we need it.”

My heart swells at the kindness of this man, and I fight back more tears, then walk outside to sit in the backyard. I lower myself to sit with my feet in the pool and remember the first time I saw him here at a party the summer after he moved to Kroydon Hills.

He was gorgeous.

There were so many guys from our high school, tanned and toned and showing off, but he was all I could see.

I slowly swing my foot around in the water and picture his face appearing in the ripple.

It’s amazing how nothing seems like it’s important anymore. Nothing but him being safe and whole. I’d make a deal with the devil himself if it meant Cooper would be okay.

I’m not sure how long I’m alone before Annabelle joins me. She lowers herself carefully to the cement, her pregnant belly throwing her balance off.

“How are you doing, Carys?”

I look at her. If you didn’t know her, you’d think she had everything she ever wanted. A dream life. An easy life. But she had to fight her way there. Her parents died, leaving her as the sole guardian of her little brother. A crazy stalker tried to kill her and the twins while she was still pregnant with them. Declan and she have an incredible life, but she had to go through hell for it.

Was I not willing to fight for what I wanted?

Was I being weak when I thought I was being strong for both of us?

“Carys . . .” she pushes.

“Sorry, what?” I guess I got lost in my own thoughts. “Where are the kids, Belles?”

She runs a finger through my hair. “We gave in and got a nanny a while ago. I needed help, and she’s amazing.”

“That’s good,” I tell her absently.

“Carys . . . are you?—”

The back door opens, and Murphy yells for us to come inside. “They found Cooper.”