Until Then

18. Noah

EIGHTEEN

Noah

Hayley’s ex is a true scumbag. The man has made it his mission for the whole of the week to blast every image of us across his platforms, to boost every other post with comments. I know his type, a guy who can’t stand to look like the rejected one.

He probably took a bit of pride when he was caught with Red and Hayley was cast aside. No doubt, he spun the story as being unsatisfied with the normal girl he had at home.

If the normal girl is Hayley Foster, I’d be running home every night.

The worst I’ve gotten is a furious message from Eden

Eden: You dump me in public for cheating when you had a GIRLFRIEND FOR MONTHS?

Eden: You are a dirtbag, Noah.

There’s a bit of guilt letting Eden think I was fooling around on the side. Part of me wants to admit it isn’t true, but Eden is not the sort to let such a juicy bit of gossip stay secret.

And the reality is, Eden never cared about me. As much as it makes me feel a little like that dirtbag guy, I didn’t care much about her either.

No one dug into my chest the way Hayley did all those months ago. She’s the one who matters in this. Being tossed into the limelight is never simple.

I check in each morning, making certain she’s all right. So far, she insists she’s fine. I’m the one who teeters between happiness she’s back, and the plaguing thoughts that hover like a damp cloud in my head with all the ways I’ll bring her down, ruin her.

I tilt my head back and swallow one of my pills, chasing it down with a long drink, and wait for the fog to lift a little.

A few more, then we’ll try again. I stare at the bottle, nerves and unease are there. Still, it’s the right move. It’s the next move.

Dan Stone has been the one working with me for the last three years. The best kept secret of Noah Hayden, but he thinks it’s worth a try to wean down the meds.

Last time I tried, it didn’t go so good.

We’re more controlled this time, but Hayley’s here now. Maybe she’s not really mine, but there are pieces of me that would add to her reservations of making us into something more, no doubt.

I force myself to put my phone on the table and get ready for the day, get some sunlight.

Halfway through the attempts at taming my wild cowlick, someone buzzes my condo. Rees and Vienna left two days ago, so did my dad and Justine. Briar is still on her honeymoon. Carter went back to Vegas with Wren and Griffin for the last of the break.

I pat the back of my head, trying to get the stupid strand of hair to lie down, and press the button to the gate. “Hello?”

“Noah?” A woman responds.

“Who’s this?” Hair lifts on the back of my neck. I’m accustomed to being very vague when people find my address.

“Don’t worry, I’m not a crazed fan.” She laughs. “Then again, I think that’s exactly what a crazed fan would say. Anyway, it’s Greer.”

Hayley’s friend. “Um . . . hi?”

“I know, freaky, right? I have your address though because you one hundred percent let Hayley text me your driver’s license. Bold of you back then, but I was in the neighborhood for work, and have a few questions for you.”

I arch a brow. “You here to murder me?”

“Not today. We can talk out here if you don’t want me up in your space. Totally get it.”

I like that idea better. I press the button again. “Give me two minutes.”

More like five minutes later, I step out of the building in my full garb. Sunglasses, a Vegas Kings hat, and keep my chin down. The morning commute is the worst time to be out in the sunlight.

“Over here.” Hidden behind the corner of the building, Greer waves. She’s dressed in a stylish pantsuit, and holds two coffee cups. When I approach, she hands me one. “I didn’t know exactly what you like, but I figure you can’t go wrong with chai.”

“Thanks.” I tilt my head. “What’s up?”

“I’m not weird,” Greer insists. “I’m a little eccentric, but I promise I’m here on official business on behalf of Hayley, and I already have a signed NDA prepared which states I will never give up your personal address.”

True enough, the woman pulls out an official contract from her satchel. Lawyer. I forget, she’s a lawyer.

“Thanks.” In truth, I don’t really know what else to say.

“Look, I’m only here for my girl’s best interests. She’s been vague about what happened at the wedding, only that you two are starting to see each other.”

I nod. “That’s the plan.”

“Hmm.” Greer deepens her scrutiny on my hidden face. “Well, I’d like to see to it her name and connections aren’t used to drag her through the mud if things go badly.”

A spark of anger nestles in my chest. “I wouldn’t do that to Hayley, or her family, I’m assuming those are the connections you mean.”

Greer doesn’t ruffle under my briskness, merely hands me another contract. “I’m sure you think you won’t, but I’ve learned sometimes people like to save face and they get rather petty. Hayley is still trying to rebuild a few things since the last headline started to expose the truth, and she doesn’t ever want her ranch or business impacted because of bad blood.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about. She said the ranch is struggling because of cancer treatments.”

Greer hesitates, then softly curses under her breath. “I assumed you knew. Forget it. Her grandpa’s cancer definitely gave it a financial hit.”

“Whoa, back up. What’s going on? Is someone harassing her because of the douche canoe?”

Greer’s mouth twitches. “Are we talking about Jasper?”

“Yes!” I flip my sunglasses onto the brim of my hat. “How many jerks has she been with?”

Greer fully smiles now. “We’ve all been with a few, right? Anyway, this simply states you will not speak of Sweet Cream Ranch negatively or Hayley in the event of a split or break up.”

“I’m not signing that.”

Now, it’s time for Greer to look like she might shank me. “She deserves protection, Mr. Hayden.”

“I don’t. Need to. Sign it.” I lean forward, holding her gaze. “I have no intention of ever breaking up.”

Greer’s face softens. “I love the enthusiasm, truly. Briar was absolutely shipping you two from the second you showed up at the cocktail loft, but life does happen. You both already split once.”

“Correction—I was ghosted, but I digress.”

“Fine, but now you know her, you know more about her life. There’s more at stake now.”

“Look, Greer. I didn’t know who she was last time, but I found out. I could’ve slung mud about the very memory of her to people close to me, and I still didn’t. I didn’t want to because despite the little ghosting mishap, she meant too much.”

“I’m glad.” Greer’s voice is softer than before. “But . . . she has hurts, Noah. Hurts that she doesn’t share easily. And I really, really, don’t want her to get hurt again.”

Who’s hurt my wildfire? I’d like to know, I’d like to meet them personally. With a sigh, I hold out a hand. “All right. If it helps prove I’m not in this to hurt Hayley, I’ll sign all the things. But I’m not going to be another jerk in her life, Greer. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt her.”

“I believe you,” she whispers and watches me sign two lines on her gag orders. “Thank you. For what it’s worth, I think you two are great together. Want a bit of advice?”

I lean forward, hungry for any piece of information about Hayley Foster. “Would love it.”

“Hayley has reasons to be leery about a guy wanting her for the long haul. The only guy who’s done it has been family, like uncles and her grandpa.”

“And her dad?” I blurt out the question without thinking, only half aware it’s not really my business at all.

Greer blanches. “Let her talk about that loser.”

It’s a small answer.

Dad equals danger zone.

He must’ve been a total jerk if no one at her family’s table ever mentioned the man.

“Haze has reasons to be leery of you and your social status,” Greer goes on, “but . . . I’ve never heard her voice sound so peaceful, so purely happy, than I did last year when she called me the morning after you met.” Greer looks at the sidewalk for a breath. “I’m afraid, I’m the one who spilled the beans on who you are. I tried to tell her through the night, but she ignored me to be with you. Another thing that never happens. Don’t doubt that she feels—and deeply—about you.”

“It’s all right,” I say with a smile. “I knew it was a big risk to share my face, but I . . . I didn’t want her to go. I would’ve done just about anything to keep her.”

Greer’s eyes glisten. “Again, I believe it. Another reason I’m team Noah. Even if I came with a gag. I appreciate it.”

I give her a nod and watch her put the papers back in her bag.

“If you want to see our girl in action,” Greer says before she turns to leave. “You ought to head to the ranch right now. She’s quite a sight when she’s working. I hear Nan is smitten with you. She’ll take care of you.”

Once I’m alone, I waste no time racing back upstairs, only to grab my keys and wallet, before I speed out of the city, the perfect excuse to see my girl.

This time when I arrive at the ranch, I’m greeted less like the plague and more like a cautious guest. Milton waves, and Justin nods his head.

Alice steps through the front door before I even finish climbing the stairs.

“There’s Mr. Famous.” Hayley’s grandmother wipes her hands on a dishtowel before tossing it over her shoulder.

“Hello, ma’am.”

“Tell me, when do you Southern boys lose the ma’am business?”

“Never.” I flash her a grin. “Not unless we’re specifically told to call you by something else.”

“Well, call me Alice or Nan, then. I feel old with ma’am.” She holds out an arm, beckoning me inside. “Get on in here, you look half-starved.”

I glance down my chest. I thought I was filling out a bit. Filming will start in the next few months, so it’s back to the trainers and workouts and—ugh—macros.

Alice takes me into the kitchen, never leaving a moment to ask about Hayley. I haven’t seen her, and now I’m wondering if I ought to have driven straight to her acre. Hard to do when the road cuts alongside the main house and everyone was watching me drive up.

Seemed better to visit here first, I guess.

Once I’m properly plated with sliced apples and a cup of peanut butter (Alice insisted I needed protein) she points me toward the back door, leading to the pastures and arenas. “I take it you didn’t come here to visit me. Hayley Mae is working, but she’s on her last session.”

Alice walks us to the nearest arena. There, in the middle, is Hayley, leading a horse with a kid on the back.

My wildfire is stunning. Tight jeans that leave nothing to my imagination. Dusty leather boots. A straw hat over her long fiery braid.

I’m about to shove past a kid all to get my hands on his therapist for a minute or two. Instead, I calm the inner caveman and watch how she works, how she moves, how she laughs, full and light every time the kid cracks a joke.

The boy can’t be older than ten. He’s wearing a helmet, but his legs dangle on the side of the horse.

Alice props her forearms on the top of the fence and steals one of my apples. “He was born with spina bifida, and uses his chair there.”

A small wheelchair is parked by a woman—the kids’ mom, I assume—and it looks like it could race if he wanted.

Hayley is telling the boy something, and in the next breath, the kid straightens his back. They start walking again—the horse with Hayley at its side.

“The way she explains it,” Alice goes on as though she knows I want to ask. “The motion of the horse mimics our hip movements. It’ll help him strengthen all those core muscles and his pelvis a bit. Sort of like working his body the way it would if he was walking on his own two feet.”

In truth, I’m mesmerized, pulled into Hayley’s confidence, her gentility with the way she handles both child and horse. The kid is sweating by the time they circle around to his mom, but there’s a smile on his face the size of the state.

He loves it.

The horse loves it.

Hayley loves it.

I’m pretty sure I love her.

A lot of love is going around.

I pull out my phone. As promised, I have every intention to share what I’m seeing with others. They need to know what she’s doing here. If I can give a taste of her goodness to the world, this will be more than worth it.

Even if she doesn’t want me in the end.

I’ll forget that part is even an option for now.

The boy laughs as Hayley scratches the horse’s belly and it makes a grunting sound of pleasure. Then, she directs the kid how to work his core to help swing a leg over the side, where she’s waiting to help him sit back in his chair.

“Good work, Colt. Any pain?”

“Nah.” He shakes his head and adds a Velcro strap across his legs. “Got a little nervous when she started trotting, though.”

“You did perfectly,” I hear Hayley say. She tells him how he properly engaged the tone of his other muscles and gained control even if he couldn’t use his thighs and knees as well.

“Same time next week?” the mom asks.

Hayley nods and pulls out her phone, scheduling the appointment, then walks with them to the gate, where she notices me for the first time.

Her eyes go wide, then the smile creeps over her lips. Hard to fake happiness, and I’m going out on a limb to guess she’s happy to see me.

“Oh, my gosh.” It’s the mom who lets out a breath when she sees me. “Are you . . . Noah Hayden?”

Hayley hesitates.

“The one and only, Jean.” Alice claps my shoulder. “He’s dating our Hayley.”

Jean gapes. “Really?”

Hayley hesitates, but slowly recovers. She steps up to the fence, holds my stare, then pecks my lips, smiling. “Yep.”

Maybe I’m not a good enough actor. One kiss initiated by her, and I’m stunned silent.

“I’m sorry, I don’t want to be weird,” the mom goes on, “but my husband and I are big fans of the show. You do Kage Shade so well.”

Speak. Fans. Talk.

I return a smile. “Thank you. I’ve got to give most of the credit to our showrunner and the writers, though.”

We make idle chit chat about the show. I learn she and her husband are both fans of the book series. Since I have an in with the author I promise to bring a signed copy to Colt’s next session of Chase’s new series before it’s released, and I’m pretty sure I earned a fan for life.

Before they leave, I stop them. “You can absolutely say no, but I took a video and you can see Colt’s profile in it. I was going to post it, you know, brag a little about my girl. Are you all right if I do—I’ll cover Cole’s face completely.”

His mom looks at him. “You okay if your video goes on Noah’s page?”

The kid grins up at me. “That’d be cool, but just make sure it's not when I’m screaming.”

I laugh. “No screaming, got it.”

“Noah’s been interested in helping at the ranch,” Hayley says with a touch of shyness. “He’s not just a pretty face and actually likes horses.”

“How’d you two meet?” Colt’s mom asks as we walk to their car to load up.

“Um, a chance meeting actually,” Hayley says.

“She stole my blueberry scone.”

“I did not.” She pinches my arm. “He stole mine.”

After I help put Colt’s chair in the trunk, I drape an arm around Hayley’s waist. “Agree to disagree. The point is, she had no idea who I was, and I couldn’t help but fall headfirst.”

With a hand to her chest, Colt’s mom grins. “I love that. I also love the idea of more people learning about this one.” She nudges Hayley’s arm. “She’s been a miracle worker for Colt. He’s just free here. He feels so big and?—”

“ Mom , stop.” The kid complains from the open window.

She laughs. “Sorry. Well, we better get going.”

We wave, and I assure her I’ll have the copies of the book next week. Chase already sent me ten to give to friends and family. Rees claimed his before he went home.

Hayley jabs my ribs with her elbow when they’re well down the lane. “You are an unexpected surprise, Pretty Boy.”

“It’s been too long since I’ve seen you,” I say, and there isn’t a lie to be found.

“Hmm. Needy. I kind of like it.” Hayley glances down at her jeans, then to mine. “You know, you’re sort of dressed right. What do you say before I change, you prove your cowboy skills? Want to go for a ride?”

I’m almost embarrassed how the idea of horseback riding with Hayley Foster makes me squeal like a toddler. “Do I want to ride horses with a sexy woman, alone? I think you’ve just described my lifelong dream. If I die, it’s because I’ve gone out happy.”

She snickers. “Don’t die yet. I’m not finished with you.”