Why Not Now? (The Blue Vista Crew #2)

11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Ava

“R ight. Of course.” I clear my throat. “I just need to save my work and get changed.”

“Can I see it?” Derek gestures to the computer where I’d been editing the pictures I’d taken last week. I’d already finished with the ones I’d taken at Blue Vista on Monday and had been finishing up on a few more images that would form part of my portfolio.

“I guess so.” I lead him over to my desk and sit down, taking a quick breath for courage before clicking on the first image. “I took a bunch of pictures last week at this cute little restaurant downtown.”

I show him the plates and the tables. It’s an Italian place with a cozy ambiance and I’m happy with how well the pictures turned out. There are a couple of the candles they have on the tables and one of a waitress writing something on her notepad.

“These are awesome, Ava. Did you send your portfolio to Spencer and Vic?”

“Oh. I didn’t know if that was a serious offer. Besides, what can they do? You guys have an awesome business, but can they really get my name out there?”

Derek chuckles, and I glance at him over my shoulder. “Yes. Have you heard of Cole Enterprises and Sterling Properties?”

“Who hasn’t?” I say. Especially since I want to do photography for businesses, I certainly know two of the largest companies in Vancouver.

“Spencer Cole and Victoria Sterling. Neither of them work for Daddy’s business, but they have connections just the same. And that’s not including me. I’m the acquisitions director. I’ve been building relationships with businesses in Vancouver and the surrounding area for the last five years.”

I snap my jaw shut when Derek taps my chin, my mouth having fallen open as he explains his high-profile friends.

“You sure made it big in the friend department,” I say, turning to the computer to finish saving my files. I move to stand, but Derek presses me back into my chair.

“Where is your portfolio saved? Is it online?”

“I—Derek. This isn’t a big deal.”

“It is. Where is it saved?”

I navigate to the website where I’ve created an online portfolio of all my best pictures. It’s something I’m incredibly proud of. I’ve put so much time into it, selecting the exact layout I want, learning how to adjust the template that came with the website builder so it would work for what I need. Each picture is carefully curated, with web pages dedicated to different types of businesses I’ve photographed. I’ve sold a few of the pictures when a business owner notices me and I told them what I’m doing. Most only live on my website.

Even though I’ve made the website itself as perfect as I can, I never really tell people about it, not wanting to feel like a failure in this if no one decides to hire me.

“Good. Open an email.”

His hands are still on my shoulders and he’s kneading the muscles there. Heat swamps my body, flashing through my limbs and pooling at my core.

He leans forward and his breath caresses my cheek. My eyes drift closed.

“Open an email, Ava,” he says, right next to my ear and I shiver, but I also do what I’m told. Once the blank email is open, his hands leave my shoulders, and I whimper in protest. He laughs softly as his arms come around me to reach my keyboard. He types three addresses into the To field, then moves to the subject line.

“All yours, sweetheart.” His hands settle back on my shoulders and he keeps massaging while I type the subject and the body of the email.

I’m melting into my chair as his fingers find and rub away the knots in my neck and shoulders. If he offered to give me a full-body massage, I would not be turning him away. I’d almost rather stay home tonight and let him keep touching me than do whatever it is he has planned.

I hit send and his hands leave my shoulders again. He claps. “Let’s go.”

“Hm?”

“Come on, Ava. Christmas awaits.”

The haze lifts and I remember what I was going to do. I stand, finding him much closer than I thought he was going to be.

“I need to get changed first.”

“You look perfect. Get your camera.”

As I usually am in the colder months, I’m wearing light grey leggings and a cream-coloured sweater dress, my wardrobe more of a uniform to remove some of the decision-making from my life. I suppose it can work, though for the first time in a long time, I wish I had a more diverse wardrobe like I used to in high school. “Okay. Go upstairs and I’ll be up in a minute.”

He leaves me and I grab a belt to go with the dress, run a brush through my hair, leaving it loose, and gather my camera and a couple other things, then head up to see what Lacey and Derek are doing.

They’re sitting in the living room where Lacey has books spread over the couch.

“What are you studying, Ace?” he asks, looking over her books.

I stop to eavesdrop.

“I failed a math test this week. My teacher is the absolute worst.”

Derek shakes his head. “You can’t blame your teacher for you not studying.”

Lacey sighs. “I know. I just hate math so much.” She closes her book, tracing her fingers over the cover. “My friend Jess changed the M on the cover of her book to D-E so instead of math, it says death.”

Derek laughs. “I wish I’d thought of that. Have to say, I didn’t like math much in high school either. You know how you keep thinking, when am I ever going to use this shit in the real world? ”

“Yeah. Do you?”

“Not really,” he says. “Not most of it. But you still gotta pass your math tests.”

“I wish I could come with you guys. I’d rather be doing pretty much anything than studying.”

I swallow hard at Lacey’s wistful tone. I can’t give in. Making her study is the right thing in this situation.

“Pass your math test and I’ll take you out with us,” Derek says.

“Really?”

I clear my throat and move into the dining room where they’re seated. “No. Not really. We don’t bribe for good behaviour.”

Derek turns to me with that smile that makes me think I’ll do just about anything he says. “I prefer to think of it as positive reinforcement.” He stands and turns back to Lacey with that smile and a wink. “Show me that A, Ace.”

He leads me out the front door.

“You can’t come in here and offer to take my sister out if she gets an A on her math test. That’s not how the world works.”

Derek holds up his hands. “I didn’t say I would take her out if she got an A. I told her to pass the test. I’m taking you out. There’s no reason she can’t come as well if she’s free and has all her studying done. You guys deserve a little more fun in your lives, I think.”

“We have enough fun.”

“Do you?” He opens the passenger door of his car for me, and I glare up at him.

“Yes.” I slide in and he closes the door, then gets into the driver’s seat.

He passes me his phone, unlocked, the music app loaded. “Choose a song. We’ve got enough time for two before we get there.”

I look down at the phone in my hand. If we were going to listen to music when we were together, he’d always let me choose. I’d get to put on whatever I wanted. As a Swifty, that meant Derek had to listen to way more Taylor Swift than he probably liked. He never complained.

“Get where?” I ask, considering a couple songs. “We’re leaving late. Will that be a problem?”

“No problem. And it’s a surprise.”

I scroll through the app, noting the playlist names and a few of the album covers associated with them. “You have a workout and a cool down playlist.”

He shoots me a quick glance. “You don’t have to choose one of my playlists. Put on whatever you want.”

I select a song I know we both like, and it comes on loud enough to rattle the glass.

“Shit. Sorry,” Derek says, turning the volume down.

“Still listening to your music way too loud?”

“Always.” He grins at me before turning back to the road.

I set the phone down and turn to face him. “What’s the difference between workout and cool down?”

“Uh. One is for working out, the other is for cooling down?”

“You’re asking me?” I say with a laugh. “Aren’t these your carefully curated lists? I remember you liked to have a specific soundtrack for almost every situation. Except for when you let me choose the music.”

The hip hop song switches to the next.

“Maybe I don’t do that anymore.”

I grin at him and repeat the words he’d said to me when he’d correctly assumed I still scheduled every second of my life. “People change, Derek. They don’t change that much.”

The second song is one by Lorde that we used to listen to while he was driving. An image of him, younger, the window down, his elbow resting on the window-frame, superimposes over his current self, older, just as confident as he drives down the road, one hand lightly holding the steering wheel. I’m still watching as he uses that one hand to turn the wheel, guiding the car effortlessly into a parking lot and into a spot without ever needing his second hand. I shouldn’t be surprised at how hot his competence is, but by the time he kills the ignition, my panties are damp and I’m ready to tell him he can take me here in the front seat of his car if he wants.

“So?”

I swallow, wondering if he’s guessed my thoughts. But he’s talking about where we are. I blink out of my lust-fueled thoughts and note we’re at VanDusen Gardens. I’m honestly shocked he’s found a parking spot, but he’s always been lucky.

He gets out of the car and comes around to my side, turning his cap around to shield his face from the light rain before opening the door for me. “Come on.”

“Isn’t the Festival of Lights like thirty dollars?”

“Not quite. Let’s go.”

I still don’t get out. “Derek. I told you nothing too expensive. Two tickets for not quite thirty dollars is not quite sixty.”

He sighs and crouches next to me, looking up at me from under the brim of his cap. “Ava. I can afford one slightly more expensive outing. I promise the rest aren’t.” He considers for a moment. “Well. One is more, but I got comp tickets to that, so it doesn’t count.”

“Comp tickets?” I ask, confused.

“Yes. My buddy’s wife has been on me to take some for a while now. I never got the chance before.”

“Why did she want to give you comp tickets?” I delay longer, debating between my desire to go in and not wanting him to spend his money. It’ll feel too much like a date.

“I got them some deals on their wedding this past summer. Now. I’ve already paid for this, so if you don’t come with me, it’ll be a waste. And you won’t get pictures of the lights.”

I purse my lips, and his gaze drops to them. “Fine. I’ll come. But I want it noted that I am not happy about you spending money on me.”

“Consider it noted.”

He holds out his hand and I take it, getting out of the car. He looks me over, frowning.

“Wait. Where’s your coat?” he asks.

“Um. I’m wearing it?” I zip it up and pull my hood on as though to prove my point.

“That’s not waterproof. You’re going to get soaked.”

I shrug. “It’s not a big deal. I don’t have another coat.”

“Ava. How can you not have a waterproof jacket in Vancouver?”

I roll my eyes. “It was a choice between coat or shoes. I chose shoes. It’s warm, at least.”

He shakes his head, moving to the back of his car. “That just means it won’t dry fast later. Here.” He pops the trunk and pulls out a bright blue shell jacket, shaking it out. He puts it on me over my coat, zipping it up so I’m completely covered.

“What is this?”

“The jacket I wear when I’m running. It’s clean. And waterproof.” He scowls. “Let’s go.”

I follow him to the admission gate. We’re through quickly and I come to a stop as I take in the lights for the first time. The riot of colour makes the breath catch in my chest and I pull out my camera to take a picture.

The lights, the laughter, the music. Everything combines, sending a shiver through me, the magic of the season filling me up as I capture the joy in the pictures. Couples and small groups of people mill around, smiling and laughing despite the cold, wet weather.

When I look up at Derek, he’s already watching me, a soft smile on his lips. “Worth the entry fee?”

I wipe the stupid grin off my face. “No. I’m still mad at you.”

He chuckles. “Sure you are, sweetheart. Come on. Let’s see what else you can take pictures of.”

We start on the path that winds through the park and I stop every few feet to take pictures of the beautiful lights dressing up the trees and the baubles that seem to float on the surface of the pond. The glitter of the decorations glint in the sparkle of the lights and every photo is pure magic.

As we walk, I glance down at my view screen on my camera. These are going to be stunning in my portfolio. Something about Christmas makes everything seem a little brighter. I don’t know why I never thought to come here before, or to any of the other Christmas events that happen in and around Vancouver.

Derek pulls me to a stop on one side of the water and I glance at him, curious. He doesn’t say anything, just waits until suddenly a song begins, and lights flash in time with it.

I gasp. “Carol of the Bells,” I say.

He smiles. “Your favourite.”

“How do you…”

He shrugs. “I remember. I’d like to tell you I planned this, but it’s just a happy coincidence they use your favourite Christmas carol for the light show.”

I link my arm through his and lean my head on his shoulder as we watch the lights dance and change colours in time with the music, other couples around the pond doing the same. When it’s over, we continue on, walking through a light tunnel and around the water. I don’t unlink our arms.

I let Derek lead as we make our way back to the admission gate and start a second circuit. I just take in the lights this time, not worrying about photography, enjoying the views and the laughter of other people, letting the ambiance fill me up.

Derek stops us under an archway, and I look up at him quizzically. He points above our heads, and I see we’re standing under some mistletoe.

“You led me here on purpose, didn’t you?” I ask.

“Maybe.”

His eyes search mine and I know he’s wondering the same thing I am. What is this between us? What does it mean? What can we do together without having our hearts broken?

The questions fade as he pulls me closer, unlinking our arms so he can wrap his around me.

I close my eyes and tilt my face up, waiting for him to close the distance. When he does and our lips brush, I sigh and melt into him. I press my hands against the sides of his face, the sharp stubble from his five-o’clock shadow scratching against my palms.

It’s a sweet kiss, not like the ones we shared last night that were hungry and wild. This one is soft, almost unsure.

When we break the kiss, neither of us speaks. He just searches my eyes again, and I desperately want to ask what he’s thinking. Instead, we simply move on, his arm still wrapped around my waist, keeping me tucked against his side.

“This is beautiful,” I say after a while. “The only thing that would have made it better is if it was snowing instead of raining.”

He snorts. “That I can’t pull off. Even I can’t control the weather.”

“What made you think to bring me here?”

“You always loved the lights. I thought about Canyon Lights out at Capilano Suspension Bridge, but this is closer. And cheaper, actually. Was it a good choice? Do you love Christmas again?”

I laugh. “Trying to get out of taking me out after just one night?”

He smiles down at me and my heart squeezes at his expression, a look that makes me feel precious. I find my eyes focusing on his lips. “I’ll take you out whenever you want, sweetheart. Just say the word.”

For a second, I’m transported back nine years. We’re still nineteen years old, still in love. My parents are still alive and I’m in college, my whole life ahead of me, full of promise.

Then I blink and I’m in the present, my heart aching, because I can never get back there, no matter how many fun Christmas things Derek takes me to, no matter how many sweet kisses we share under the mistletoe or how many hot nights we share in bed. I’m not that naive girl anymore. I haven’t been in a very long time.